Gay Christian

[Counselor]

So I am a Christian and I am gay. I use to think you could not be both gay and a Christian, but recently within the past few months I came to the conclusion that you could. However because I was raised in church, I believe that you can be a homosexual, but you can not act on it. That it is the act of homosexuality that is the sin, not the being homosexual. So I am looking at a life of being single. Which can suck at times, but at times I am ok with it. I am not trying to start a debate. I just want advice on how to be more ok with being single and never acting on my desires.

You are not going to ever hear me say "force yourself to be miserable."

If there is a god that dictated natural law, he did not create you to be miserable. Your body is designed to respond positively to pleasure, not abstain and pine for it. You should do what makes you happy, not impose rules from a silent father figure that can't defend his "plan" for you.

Your feelings have value, and you need to understand that no amount of dogma should be allowed to invalidate that.

[Kiid]

So I am a Christian and I am gay. I use to think you could not be both gay and a Christian, but recently within the past few months I came to the conclusion that you could. However because I was raised in church, I believe that you can be a homosexual, but you can not act on it. That it is the act of homosexuality that is the sin, not the being homosexual. So I am looking at a life of being single. Which can suck at times, but at times I am ok with it. I am not trying to start a debate. I just want advice on how to be more ok with being single and never acting on my desires.

Jesus died for your sins. And love is not a sin. I have friends who are gay and are Christian and they are allowed to be as gay as they like they are allowed to be themselves. As you are too. One of them is even head of the Christian Student Movement and queer support at the university here. Jesus said nothing about homosexuality. And the old testament was to be done away with so you are allowed to date who ever you like. And I bet you've sinned before so jus ask for forgiveness and it'll be given on your death day.

Not that I believe in god but I think everyone should have the right to find a soul mate!

[LateBloomer]

Thanks, its not making me uncomfortable, I am glad for the advice, but I dunno I still feel like
God is against acting on it.
Also if he created me gay but it is against it then he is not the God I thought he was. However I do not think he is that cruel. So I am still not sure that he created me to be gay. I think he more or less allowed me to be this way, but still does not want me to act on it. Also I am afraid that if I think it is ok to act on it, I may die and find out its wrong and end up in hell over it. Plus I do not want God to give me over to a reprobate mind.

Sorry for that act of randomness I hope you can make heads or tails of it.

Babe, listen...

I'm Catholic and gay.

You have a couple (very common) misconceptions here.

First of all, being a Christian means that you believe Christ is the son of God, he died on the cross, rose 3 days later and that you follow His teachings.

That's pretty much it.

Guess what? Christ never took a position on homosexuality. Nope. All of that came much later from the Church. And guess who runs the Church: MEN. And who are these men? They are human and therefore sinners, just like you and me.

Furthermore! Yes, God made you. He knew your name before you were born (Luke?) and He loves you.

All that said, you need to live YOUR life in a manner that is satisfactory to YOU. If you truly believe you are giving glory and honor to God by living essentially a life of chastity then so be it and more power to you. But I happen to believe that God put us on this Earth to love Him and each other (unabashedly)!

It's up to you, and I know it's hard to be critical of the Church at a young age. I left for many years until I could reconcile all of the seeming contradictions, but eventually I came to realize (as much as the Church would hate to admit it) there is a difference between what Christ taught and what these men preach.

Christ was ALWAYS an advocate for the poor, the broken, the outcast (prisoners, prostitutes, tax collectors, etc). There is no question in my mind--or heart--that the love I have for my partner is contrary to what Christ taught.

My sexual activity is contrary to the Catholic Church, YES, no doubt. But they're stuck in a rhetorical argument about what the true purpose of sex is (conception and the value of life, etc....) and that's a whole other kettle of fish that I could write forever about....

Just find your truth and live with courage and if that means a solitary life, then so be it. I won't judge you. But please never feel like God or Christ will love you less because you are a child of God, no matter what anyone says.

[Kiid]

Hello Tyler!

As you have already found out, there are lots of non-christians on here, and are ready for debating on religious subjects.

If you havent found a religious co-heart on here yet, you might want to chat with Bowyn Aerrow.
I think he may feel he's ganged up on sometimes, being the local believer....he would probably appreciate some backup!!!

I don't believe. But I think that having faith can be good for ones soul.

[Tyler]

Thanks to everyone I just watched the video by Matthew Vine. It has a lot of truth, some truth that may take me awhile to believe to be true. thanks.

[Xela]

Hi Tyler! I too am a gay christian with a lot of questions. I have spent most of my life denying that I am gay but I can not keep it up. I thought it was impossible for me to be gay because I thought christians could not be gay, guess I was wrong. Anyway, I don't have all the answers either. All I know is that God is love and he loves me no matter what, and you too. Don't lose your faith, hold on to it. I hope we can make some sense of this!

[Tyler]

Me too. I do want a family and to be in a monogamous relationship. I just want God to be okay with it.

[Xela]

I can understand that. I too want to be in a relationship and don't want to go against God. But I don't think it is reasonable to be single your whole life. That does not sound like a happy life to me... I actually met someone a few months ago and I tried to get into a relationship with him, which was probably not smart considering I was not completely sure of his orientation. My point is when you see someone you like, it will be hard to stay away. I plan to get into a relationship sooner or later, I can't be alone.

[Kiid]

Me too. I do want a family and to be in a monogamous relationship. I just want God to be okay with it.

God is ok with it!

[Tyler]

God is ok with it!

I want to believe that, but I do not want to make the wrong choice.