At what age did you know you were gay?

[skijor]

I try!

[James]

As I remember it was around 8 or 9, I see your in the states, so, does your junior or senior high school have a gay straight alliance club? That would be a help in the coming years, also if yor city has a glbtq center( gay lesbion bisexual transgender questioning), they may have resources available to everyone as ours does here. One of the groups I sponser (financially) is for parants of gay etc youth. I commend you on the exellent job of raising your children as you stated your other children are supportive.
Is your husband a retired military, lots of us have issues and are ahh, overbearing. If so you may find support for the other issues with veitnam veterans of america, as we welcome vets from all wars, Jim

[ZipZapZop]

Four .

[Sylph]

Four .

Simplest. Answer. Evah lol

[issonotfunny]

I always knew that I was gay since a very young age, or at least I was different. Like around kindergarten, I knew what was pretty/cute/beautiful but I also knew what i was attracted tos

[VNight2014]

Ive always known. It took me a few years to learn what gay was though. I never liked girls, even as friends until recently, and even then they all turned out to be lesbians... I was raised Mormon and didn't know what gay was until I was in middle school. So I'm glad I know now and I'm happy!

[Miles]

I really opened up to the idea of being bi at 16, though in retrospect there have always been little sign posts I guess. I figured it was pretty much settled by 18.

[Tyrion]

Why everytime I get on here the mod has to review my posts?

I think once you get past a certain number of posts that goes away

[daisy]

THANK YOU, THANK YOU for answering my questions and so much more . I can't believe all the support and great responses and kind words.

James, The HS my son will attend does have a gay/straight alliance club but he is entering Jr. High so it will be a few years for that. My husband is not military. Just difficult.

Nick, I never associated playing with dolls to be gay. The reasons I thought my son was gay was way beyond that. He just happened to play with dolls. And happened to like girl clothes. But my suspicions of him being gay was more of a feeling than that. I just KNEW And it apparently I was right.


queenodi, you crack me up

[dfiant]

Hmm. I was a sheltered child, I didn't actually understand what "gay" was until grade 9ish. Anything gay was banned from my father's home.

Oddly, From grade 6 to grade 9 I had feelings for a friend, and he had them back for me. Neither of us really understood what they meant, and over time I think he realised he was bi-sexual rather than gay, and he said quote on quote, "You know how awhile ago, some people thought I was gay? I'm not. Like, I like gay people and stuff, I think some of my friends don't like them though, like [insert a random friend], but I think it's okay to be gay, but I'm not. Haha.".

So whatever. No big deal. I cried myself to sleep for like a week. I began to actually understand in grade 9 that I wasn't like everyone else, but I would try to have a normal relationship. I thought that if I went out with a girl that I would "become" normal.

But that didn't work.

In grade 10 I accepted AND UNDERSTOOD, finally, that I was gay. I educated myself using Wipe Out Homophobia on Facebook as to what sexuality and everything was. I love that page .

In a way, I'm a little bit jealous of people who knew when they were like 10. I knew I was different, but I didn't understand for ages, and it caused some problems in my youth. Had I been raised by my mom, things would have been different.

You have an opportunity as a parent to help your son along, to make sure he doesn't have to go through the slow process of coming to terms with himself alone. You can get him into groups of people that think like him (if he's a nerd, he'll fit well into nerdish things, and meet great friends, and BONUS, nerds don't tend to get too involved in the drug scene ).

Now, I'm going to address some of your concerns I sincerely believe that homosexuality impacts personality, and that one of the things many homosexual persons experience is that many of us shrug off gender roles. Some homosexual men are very feminine, a lot have done girlish things, a lot aren't into sports. Some of the exact same men grow up and go into the army. Some don't. But it doesn't mean your son will want to turn into a girl. Remember: Gender and sexuality are very unrelated, people who change genders don't usually change their interested in at the same time. A lot of men that become girls become lesbians, and in other countries, gender swapping is regarded as a cure to homosexuality! Being gay does NOT mean being a female .

Personally, when I was young, I used to want to be a girl, I thought they had easier lives! I think I was so wrong, today I'm very happy to be male. Things change, and your son's experience isn't unhealthy. His willingness to try all sorts of things right in front of you means he is comfortable around his parents, and that's something you should be so so proud of.

If you have questions, pages like this are always around for you. Hopefully you can come back and get to know some of us, and get insight into your son... although to be honest, you're doing a good job already. You care, that's like parenting rule one. .

I love you