I have always been attracted to only men since I was a little boy. Women's bodies do nothing for me at all. I really dislike women's legs. So I knew I was gay since birth. There was never a doubt in my mind
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I have always known I was gay. Attracted to only men all of my life. Very effeminate. I have never been attracted to women. I just can't imagine being with a woman. I dislike women's legs most of all.
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I think the problem with sexuality, and sexual identity, is the fact that so many people feel they have to put themselves into one of three-or-four different pre-sets, and then just accept that's who they must be.
Personally, I think orientation goes way beyond straight, gay, or bisexual; and I think for some it can go beyond just the sexual elements.
Sometimes we can have a romantic "orientation" of sorts that is contrary to our sexual one, and we can all have different variations that affect our attractions - some people are only attracted to people older/younger than them, of a particular colour, of a particular career, etc, etc.
Another example would be how some people are attracted to both genders, but may seek purely sexual relationships with one gender, and purely romantic relationships with the other. And even then, that could change depending on the person.
I think a lot of our struggles when it comes to our sexual identity, stem purely from the fact that we feel the need to identify it, and find a name to put on it, so we can then explain it to others in a succinct way. And I think this "generalization" in terminology strips away a lot of important elements that define our personal wants/needs when it comes to love & lust.
Sexuality can change, or desires can evolve. We can't change who we are willingly, but I think subconsciously we do change over time. For instance, a bicurious teen could potentially grow up to find themselves completely attracted to women, or completely attracted to men - even after having experienced genuine feelings for both.
A lot of people dismiss teenage sexual experimentation as a "phase", but I think it's merely the period where we do most of our discovery - as we reach the stage were we're doing a lot of growing up at once.
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I know exactly how you feel Ghost. I asked myself the same questions about my sexuality. Especially since I came out a year ago. I have never been in a relationship with anyone before so i asked myself, "well how do i know if I don't like women if i haven't tried?" I tried to look at a woman sexually but it just doesn't work for me. Deep down you just know who you are. Don't let others opinions or thoughts scare you. Worrying over stuff has always ruined my time with things.
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Like someone on here told me when I was trying to figure out if I'm gay or not, "It's not about who you have sex with. It's about who you can see yourself growing old with, spending the rest of your life with, sharing your most personal secrets with. If that person you see yourself with happens to be of the same gender, then you can pretty much guarantee that you're gay."
But like most people on here, and in the LGBT community, I hate labels too. I say love the person you love and save the labels for the clothes.
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Have you tried the egg test yet?
That's the one where you crack an egg into a bowl then put it under your bed while you're asleep. If the egg is slightly reddish in color by morning, then you know that you're gay!
Also, a good way to tell is if you like having sex with men instead of women.
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