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07-15-2013, 03:58 PM

Last night I went to my first ever gay bar. I had plans to go with friends, but they canceled. I really wanted to go so I went alone. I had so much fun! There was fog, glitter, and rainbows galore. While I was there I saw this guy I had this huge crush on. I meet him online through a dating site in February and we talked for a two months through text. He is a college student who works his way to pay for rent and school, so I knew he had a busy schedule and did not necessarily have time for a date. When I finally got the courage to ask him on a date he stopped messaging me all together. I was hurt, but I got over it. A few weeks ago he messaged me again, but I didn't say much back because I just thought he was a pig and wanted me to be a late night booty call. He never said anything along those lines, but when you ask a guy to come over at 11:30 at night what else could he have wanted?! Haha When I actually saw him in person for the first time last night it was different. He seemed pretty shy. I didn't talk to him because I just felt it would be awkward. I caught him looking at me a few times during the night. When I caught him looking, he looked away like he was embarrassed. I have to admit, I do still have feelings for him. What is this guy's deal? Should I message him? Should I talk to him? I don't know what to do here.

Dan1980 · 07-15-2013, 08:10 PM

I don't see any harm in you messaging the guy and asking him out. From what you say about him in your post he may want to date you and is too shy to ask. You could arrange to meet up for dinner then maybe go to the gay bar.

07-15-2013, 08:13 PM

He might just be shy. Talk to him live or message him. Otherwise you might miss a opportunity.

07-15-2013, 08:17 PM

EVERYONE is different online than they are in "real life".

You have nothing to lose by asking him out. You both might be pleasantly surprised.

When I was dating online, I was happy with a FEW emails back and forth, but after that I wanted to meet in person. Relationships are based on FACE TO FACE interaction. There's chemistry involved.

Good luck!

07-15-2013, 10:15 PM

^^^ That is not altogether true with me what you see is what you get - I hate wearing masks.

As for you OP- go with your first impression/gut instinct. That little voice warning you off most likely is better than second guessing. Besides he is too busy for a relationship at this time. Even if he is not looking for just a booty call, that being busy thing ends up tearing relationships apart.

07-15-2013, 11:00 PM

SCREW THE TEXTING!!!!

Walk your ass over to him and drag him somewhere you can talk, face to face.
Find out what his "deal" is.

07-15-2013, 11:07 PM

The thing is I asked him out through text a few months ago and he never responded to my message. I just took it as he wasn't interested. Since he messaged me again a few months later and asked me to come over I don't know what to think to be honest. After I caught him looking at me multiple times last night, it just leaves me confused about how he might feel.

07-16-2013, 02:04 AM

You'll never know if you don't try.

Richard

07-16-2013, 03:06 AM

I think what I'll do is wait until next Sunday and talk to him in person. Sunday is the only day of the week that the bar is a gay bar. Weird right? There isn't much of a gay scene in town so I'm pretty sure he'll be there again.
I'll keep you guys updated. Wish me luck!

07-16-2013, 03:13 AM

Bowyn Aerrow Wrote:^^^ That is not altogether true with me what you see is what you get - I hate wearing masks.

Hence all the "elf" faces?
LOL