Coming Out Quiz

[Wade]

1. Why did you come out when you did?

I came out when I was 18. At the time I was severely unhappy and I thought the reason was that I was in the closet. I thought coming out would fix everything. It didn't at the time, but in the long run I'm very happy I did.

2. What was the best part about coming out?

My brother telling me "Yeah, I always figured one of us would turn out gay."

3. What was the worst part?

There wasn't really a worst part for me. My coming out was pretty smooth. My family and friends at the time didn't give a shit, which was fantastic.

4. What was the biggest surprise?

I was so nervous in trying to say the words "I'm gay" to my then best friend (who's female) that when I finally said it she exclaimed "Oh thank God! I thought you were going to tell me you're in love with me."

5. Any regrets about coming out?

In a way. I came out to everyone close to me except my father. He still doesn't know. I was too terrified to tell him at the time, and now I wish I had. My fear now is that when he finally does figure it out (which... he should have some suspicion. His 25 year old son has never shown any interest in the opposite sex and he loves musical theatre...) he'll discover that I told everyone else years ago. It's possible that his feelings might be hurt. I wish I had told him then. There's a lot of unsaid things between us that float in the air when we see each other. I think if I came out to him it would literally be the first time we actually had a genuine conversation about something that matters. Regardless of his reaction, I know things would be better between us today.



Overall, I have no regrets about actually coming out to who I did come out to. When I was younger the idea of coming out seemed so implausible. "Coming out" seemed so monumentally terrifying. I just figured I'd marry some girl and live a life of quiet desperation. So far, none of my past fears have come to fruition, and no one whose opinion and regard I care about thinks any less of me.

[elad12]

1. Why did you come out when you did?
My wife of 30 years had died 4 years earlier and I felt like enough time had passed and after 40 years of living straight I just wanted to live the rest of my life as a gay man.

2. What was the best part about coming out?
Feeling like I was myself again for the first time in 40 years. Being free to be myself. Not living a lie.

3. What was the worst part?
Feeling on one hand like I had wasted the best years of my life living straight and on the other hand feeling guilty for having those feelings because the life with my wife had been a good one really other then sex and intimacy.

4. What was the biggest surprise?
How young it makes me feel.

5. Any regrets about coming out?
Not that I can think of.

[Jake]

1. Why did you come out when you did?
I came out because I was tired of living a lie, while being with girls and being a father although I was very happy there was something not right. I came out for myself first but foremost for my baby Alex that I met 8 years ago who was totally fine with his gayness and I didn't want him to feel the need to keep is boyfriend as a secret. I officially came out I was 30 years old which mean one year after I met Alex. I loved the dude too much and didn't want him to suffer for my need to hide.
2. What was the best part about coming out?
Funny enough many came back to me saying there was something wrong about you Jakey... while you were a very honest person we knew there was some kind of a huge secret you never wanted to tell. The acceptance level was quite amazing... my family had nothing to say much about it as they said that I deserved to be happy... I had a very rough childhood and they were just happy for me. I only lost two of my "so-called" friend but gained so much more
3. What was the worst part?
Although I was out it took me sometimes to get used to it... I kept refusing on kissing Alex publicly for almost a year after I came out,
4. What was the biggest surprise?
My confidence level went from practically null to a lot more extrovert I wasn't scared anymore and yes I started showing some feelings which I would have never do before... because I was a ma'an lol
5. Any regrets about coming out?
Oh your god no! I love my baby to death, He loves me and I know it and we have done what we wanted... we had sex like rabbits and settle down with kids... those I already had and the other that followed. We broke the statistic = an interracial young gay couple can have a normal life, kids, dreams and love all at once without being seen as outcast. And we broke the 5 years benchmark of being in a gay relationship at a early age.

[bluefox4000]

1. Why Did you come out when you did?

I came out at 11 cause.....fuck hiding, lol.

2. What was the best part about coming out?

Acceptance from mt family.

3. What was the worst part?

Learning about biphobia and that a large part of it comes from my own community.

4. What was the biggest surprise?

hmmmmmmm.....none that i can think of.

5. Any regrets?

None. Fear doesn't pay.

Mick

[starbelly]

1. Part of it was accidental, and part of it was deliberate on my part. I came out to my best friend and then from there told a family member and within a week my whole family (some extended too) knew. It was kind of ridiculous but relatively easy I guess.

2. I didn't have to make shit up anymore, or pretend to be interested in girls. It was a constant point of contention for me. Keeping an act up. Why would I want to continue to do that?


3. Not sure if there were any bad aspects of it, honestly. My family is great and it didn't have a negative effect on my life at all.


4. My parents basically already knew. Even more surprising though was that my brother DIDN'T know or even suspect it. That surprised me. I was also surprised by how liberating and cathartic it was to actually talk about it and be comfortable with talking about it. When you grow up seeing only men and women together, you get the memo at a young age that two men or two women who are together is somehow wrong or abnormal, so you keep it under wraps. It's not until I actually started discussing it that I realized how taxing it is to keep it a secret.

5. I don't regret it at all. I don't think most people do.