The go-go dancer...

[Anonymous]

I don't know why I even bother with the anonymity anymore as you guys always find out that it's me!I just shared the most memorable night with my boyfriend but then he said something that shook me up.He told me that about 1 week ago,he was approached by a local gay bar that wants him to be a go-go dancer.I've never been to a gay bar so I don't even know what these dancers do.He hasn't accepted the job yet as he wanted to run it by me first and my pooh bear really needs this job.He promises that it's all legit and I have nothing to worry about but I keep seeing those horny men "grabbing" my baby.Am I overreacting or should I be worried?Yes,the drama never ends!

[newc_student_18]

Erm well i'm not exactly sure what a go-go dancer is either. But i think if he is happy doing it, and it will earn him money he needs then i wouldn't be too worried. If it's anything like Newcastle i see old men (no offence anyone but it is always older guys) grabbing for me/my boyfriend anyway and we don't work as a dancer or anything. I think in many gay bars it's inevitable that people will inappropriately touch people who may just be walking past, so just because he is dancing or whatever i shouldn't think much would change.
Unless of course you think you can't trust him not to take things further with one of these guys? If that's the case then i think it's something much more than being a dancer your worried about.
But then what do i know, i'm being all "knowledgeable" when i know little. I hope i don't sound condescending, there is a good reason i rarely give advice, because i often sound like a 'tard lol

[Anonymous]

Believe you me,my gherkin would never dishonour I relationship.It's the mere thought of him shaking his cute behind (my baby's too adorable) for the entertainment of these strange men.He told me that they won't be allowed to fondle him but they can't stop them from "brushing" against him.Fuck.He starts working next Tuesday.My baby,having to "sell" himself.Life isn't fair.

[marshlander]

... He starts working next Tuesday.My baby,having to "sell" himself.Life isn't fair.

It's not as though he is entering a life of prostitution, drug addiction and will bring you back some nasty disease that will kill you horribly and slowly! He's taking a job as a dancer in a club, for heaven's sake

Everyone enjoys a bit of eye candy and if your man has the looks and the moves and is comfortable doing the work, what's so bad? The job has a very limited lifespan anyway. Be proud that he possesses the right attributes for this job and that other people find him so attractive ... and that you're the one who's won his heart.

As to "selling himself" don't we all do that? As a musician I have to sell myself to every audience I work for. Presumably you've attended interviews and have had to sell yourself? Most people in business seem to work on the principle of selling oneself to the client in order to get their attention.

You've mentioned there are safeguards in place to protect him from too much unwanted attention. He's presumably grown-up enough to cope with a bit of flirting. If he doesn't like it he can quit. You getting hysterical is hardly the support he needs at the start of a new and challenging part time job. I'm sure your best instincts are to keep talking to him, listen when he's worried, hug him when you can't think of anything to say and laugh when he tells you about the funny things that happened at the office today.

What's your alternative? Try and guilt-trip him into giving up? That'll shut down communication quicker than anything.

Good luck to both of you.

[marshlander]

You asked how I would feel if I saw Albert gyrating for other people ... funny you should say that, since I have frequently watched him dance for the delight of others. He is a fantastic dancer (a trained one too) and I love to watch him dance ... and to see others admiring him. I was actually writing from a little real experience

I have often watched him perform with his regular (female) dance partner, which is sometimes difficult, since dancing as a couple sends out different messages, but I would not dream of coming between him and an activity he loves so much and at which he is so good. During a pause in a performance by his dance group at a venue in Switzerland a few years ago we were alone in a room adjoining the main hall and we waltzed to the sound of the orchestra next door. Unfortunately we were busted by an elderly woman who walked through and remarked how "unseemly" it was for men to dance together :mad: That hurt.

I'm sure he would not be too offended if I suggested that his days of taking a job as a professional gogo boy may be a little in the past, but he is still my disco bunny and has matured into a most elegant dancer of many styles. I would like to think that I would feel the same pride in his achievements whatever style he danced and for whatever audience. I can get both private tuition and personal performances that none of the audience, nor his regular partner come to that, will ever enjoy. mile:

I think it's great that you are going to be able to support your guy by being there. I'm sure just that act alone will boost his confidence no end. Of course he's worried. Apart from anything else it's a new job and, by definition, one that is done very publicly. Sounds stressful enough to me.

[Anonymous]

LOL at spotysocks!I don't know where to start man!

[spotysocks]

haha we love you Anon! i deleted the posts you made and forgot to tick the anonymous box to keep anonymity although what you saying is actually sweet and makes wanna go ''awwwww''. However since you dont know where to start reposting your post i will try to help.

[Anonymous]

It's not as though he is entering a life of prostitution, drug addiction and will bring you back some nasty disease that will kill you horribly and slowly! He's taking a job as a dancer in a club, for heaven's sake

Everyone enjoys a bit of eye candy and if your man has the looks and the moves and is comfortable doing the work, what's so bad? The job has a very limited lifespan anyway. Be proud that he possesses the right attributes for this job and that other people find him so attractive ... and that you're the one who's won his heart.

As to "selling himself" don't we all do that? As a musician I have to sell myself to every audience I work for. Presumably you've attended interviews and have had to sell yourself? Most people in business seem to work on the principle of selling oneself to the client in order to get their attention.

You've mentioned there are safeguards in place to protect him from too much unwanted attention. He's presumably grown-up enough to cope with a bit of flirting. If he doesn't like it he can quit. You getting hysterical is hardly the support he needs at the start of a new and challenging part time job. I'm sure your best instincts are to keep talking to him, listen when he's worried, hug him when you can't think of anything to say and laugh when he tells you about the funny things that happened at the office today.

What's your alternative? Try and guilt-trip him into giving up? That'll shut down communication quicker than anything.

Good luck to both of you.

Okay...I get what you saying marsh,he isn't coming home with a disease but STILL.How would you feel if prince told you that he was going to be gyrating his hips for other men?I know it's not stripping but STILL.It's not about me but about him so I know I have to support him which I have.He's also not over the moon and he's worried about so many things.But I will support him nonetheless even if it means going to a gay bar for his 1st night.

[Anonymous]

You asked how I would feel if I saw Albert gyrating for other people ... funny you should say that, since I have frequently watched him dance for the delight of others. He is a fantastic dancer (a trained one too) and I love to watch him dance ... and to see others admiring him. I was actually writing from a little real experience

I have often watched him perform with his regular (female) dance partner, which is sometimes difficult, since dancing as a couple sends out different messages, but I would not dream of coming between him and an activity he loves so much and at which he is so good. During a pause in a performance by his dance group at a venue in Switzerland a few years ago we were alone in a room adjoining the main hall and we waltzed to the sound of the orchestra next door. Unfortunately we were busted by an elderly woman who walked through and remarked how "unseemly" it was for men to dance together :mad: That hurt.

I'm sure he would not be too offended if I suggested that his days of taking a job as a professional gogo boy may be a little in the past, but he is still my disco bunny and has matured into a most elegant dancer of many styles. I would like to think that I would feel the same pride in his achievements whatever style he danced and for whatever audience. I can get both private tuition and personal performances that none of the audience, nor his regular partner come to that, will ever enjoy. mile:

I think it's great that you are going to be able to support your guy by being there. I'm sure just that act alone will boost his confidence no end. Of course he's worried. Apart from anything else it's a new job and, by definition, one that is done very publicly. Sounds stressful enough to me.

Wise,consoling words indeed marshy.But like you said,prince does ballroom dancing which is very different to shaking your bom-bom plus I don't think the audience usually has lustful thoughts about prince.I was also very proud when I saw him dancing at the theatre but this is totally different.The only good thing about this was seeing him practise his dance moves yesterday,HILARIOUS.

[marshlander]

... The only good thing about this was seeing him practise his dance moves yesterday,HILARIOUS.

Hold that thought Just make sure he knows you are laughing with him, not at him mile: