I've been acting pretty masculine lately, but I don't know if that's who I am so I feel guilty about it.
That's kind of because I have a semi-concious belief that masculine gay men are less gay than feminine gay men.
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Why should you be guilty though? Did you offend or hurt anyone? I would call it just a behavior experiment or phase, whichever you prefer. If you realized that that's not really who you are, then no harm done, go back to however you were acting before. At least that's how I see it.
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I don't understand. My guess is that perhaps you've separated traits into "masculine" and "feminine" and feel you have to choose one or the other. In that case stop thinking like that and try to be you instead of living up to some arbitrary image. I've heard some say there's a little woman in every man and vice versa, and that's for straight people, too.
OTOH, if you're trying to "be a man to impress the men" around you then that would mean you should develop more self-confidence so you didn't look for approval from everyone else.
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I think most gay men are more masculine than the Hollywood view. Don't worry about it, it doesn't make you "less gay." Even if it made you unusual it's still ok to be different.
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