Another coming out thread!

[generic6]

Hey everyone - thanks for taking the time to read this!

I'm soon turning 23, and have decided that i want to come out (finally!).

I've had several girlfriends in the past and i think the majority of people are under the impression i like girls. I have had various (very difficult!) relationships with guys on the downlow, one which has recently ended and despite my excuses, i 100% know that it is because i was too afraid to come out.

It's took me a long time to come to terms with it, but i'm starting to feel pretty positive about it now - i've always been quite afraid of my future, knowing that i'm gay but thinking that i will never be able to be in an open, loving relationship has frightened me to say the least.

2 of my friends know and my mom knows too. My concerns are, how to tell everyone else? Especially ex-girlfriends? And mainly the people i work with - it's an all male company, with alot of banter about being gay etc. as i suppose you would expect. More than anything, i don't want to make everyone else feel awkward and be excluded from social stuff at work.

I know that i want and need to do it - i just wish that i could go on holiday, someone else could tell them, and then i could come back after a couple of weeks and they'd be over it aha.

Any suggestions?

[megumidesu]

why would you need to tell your ex girlfriends ? unless you're still friends with them ?

in which case treat coming out to them like you would any other friend . if they're really your friends they'll support you , although it might take a bit of time for them to accept things ...

[OGB]

Are you very close to your ex girlfriends? If you are just on friendly terms without being really close , I don't see the point of telling them.I am keeping in touch with my ex online , one of them still likes me but she his on the other side of the world to me so I don't see the point of telling her , I don't want her to think I was playing her or that she feels bad that she was in a "serious relationship" with a gay guy. I think ignorance is bliss for her but I might be totally wrong as there is always risks in the future that the truth comes out on Facebook or the likes.... It all depends on the sort of relationship you have with them , do you think they sort of know your gay?

[Shiner]

Eh your similar to me, in terms of discovery etc.

I like my approach. Who needs to know that you are gay unless it actually involves them, or they ask?

I also work in a male orientated, semi-homophobic workplace, and the only times I've come out is to other gay guys, to support gay guys being bullied, when I've been asked if I am, and after constant attempts to set me up with women.