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LONDONERThyey walk among us and they vote
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[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]THEY WALK AMONG US! AND THEY VOTE!
No comments needed!)


Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: 'Free to good home. You want it, you take it.'
For three days the fridge sat there without anyone looking twice. He eventually decided that people were too mistrustful of this deal. So he changed the sign to read:
'Fridge for sale, $50.'

The next day someone stole it!


I stopped at Mc Donald’s and ordered some fries. The girl behind the counter said, “Would you like some fries with that?”


One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said,"Where?"


While looking at a house, my brother asked the Estate Agent which direction was north because he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" My brother explained that the sun rises in the east and has for sometime. She shook her head and said: "Oh, I don't keep up with all that stuff..."


My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria when we overheard a girl worker talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the beach. She said, "I drove down in a convertible but didn't think I'd get sunburned because the car was moving."


My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car that is designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. SHE KEEPS IT IN THE CAR TRUNK !


I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage claim area and went to the lost luggage office and reported the loss. The woman there smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and said I was in good hands. Then she asked me, "Has your plane arrived yet?"

(I work with professionals like this.)


While working at a pizza parlor, I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time, then said, "Just cut it into 4 pieces. I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."
"You can be young without money but you can't be old without money"
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
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