Levels of Gay - The Ol' Catholic Guilt

[CurtNJbi]

Am I the only one who had levels of what I considered "gay". I was raised in a Catholic school so I lived a good chunk of my life believing being bi was sending me to hell. I use to actively tell myself I wasn't going to do anything gay and after I did I just told myself I wouldn't take it to the next level.

The first time I gave a guy oral I had him wear a rubber, cause that seemed "less gay" lol. Then I told myself I'd never be with a guy again.

A few weeks later I'm going down on him again, no rubber.

Then it was:

No anal

No kissing

No facials

Now I've done them all....I guess I should just realize it's me having fun, but I have a lot of issues getting past the old Catholic guilt. Like suddenly one more act is going to make me "Gayer" or more bi. I have things I want to try that I kind of put off, just cause of the guilt.

[Tulloni]

I've noticed that there are a lot of Catholics on gay dating websites! In fact there seem to be more Catholics there than other Christian groups, Hindus, Buddhists, etc. There certainly seem to be more gay Catholics on these sites than us Protestants! I wouldn't worry about the old guilt thing too much - lots of other Catholics are probably doing this a lot more, and then some! us WASPS have it hard at times as well - we constantly have (idiotic) people tell us that being gay is 'deviant', 'wrong' 'abnormal' then you get the same stupid fucks coming up with terms of abuse. I don't think its just the churches though, its schools, the education system, the peer group, the media, all stigmatising gay people and culture and making it hard for us to live in peace.

Just remember - you've got nothing to be ashamed of!

I don't believe in hell so I know its easy for me to say this but like I say above thousands of gay Catholics around the world are out looking for other men on these sites. Some for relationships and others for casual sex. So don't worry, you aren't alone!

Btw I am a bit self-conscious so am probably worrying needlessly but I hope I didn't offend you in anything I said above? If so I am sorry

[justbry87]

I'm not a Catholic anymore, but I can understand
where you're coming from.

I think no matter how you sugar coat the 'gay-act', in
the end it's still.. well gay.

It's kind of like that silly joke about people who diet and end
up eating the last piece of cake.

"The calories won't count if I don't eat the last bite..!"

Same goes for sex in general, gay or straight.

Guilt, for me just comes from fear. If you see a God that's
accepting and loving of all his [or her] creations then fear
and guilt won't even come into play.

[MisterTinkles]

Not trying to be offensive here or anything.......

But Catholics and Baptists pretty much have the same thing in common.

They preach one thing and then do the exact opposite. So why would you even have any guilt over something that is pretty much all lies to begin with?

[Pix]

I don't understand the appeal of Catholic guilt. It seems to me that most Catholics ignore much of the church anyway, but for some weird reason remain Catholic in name only, like this:



Why not drop the name and stop saying they're Catholic? :confused: My guess is because they associate it with family and community, but I'm not certain. Too bad they can't find something smarter or at least more trustworthy to bond with the rest of the community with.

And interesting enough I had a friend who tried to convert me and when I explained I could never believe in the Papacy and a lot of church doctrine she said that was ok because "real Catholics are jaded anyway." And btw, she was heterosexual but had far more sex than I ever had, and said the first time she engaged in S&M (both sides) was with boys who also went to Catholic school when she was 12. Just one more reason why I roll my eyes when I hear people say how oversexed most gay people are.

[justbry87]

^Yeah, every time I run into someone either on FB
or Instagram who is bashing someone for either being
gay or being Pagan/not Christian, I always take a glance
at the pictures they have and it's almost always either filled
with scantily clad women, them partying and drinking the
night away and doing a lot of the things they are preaching
is a sing according to their God.

Lol, I roll my eyes so hard they could fall off.

[Undreamt]

I think its quite common, I know it has handicapped me in the past.

[Pix]

^Yeah, every time I run into someone either on FB
or Instagram who is bashing someone for either being
gay or being Pagan/not Christian, I always take a glance
at the pictures they have and it's almost always either filled
with scantily clad women, them partying and drinking the
night away and doing a lot of the things they are preaching
is a sing according to their God.

I think partly it's to feel better about their own sins, that is by condemning others then they feel they could be worse and it's easier for God to forgive them and/or the church to accept them. (I suspect something similar goes on when some gay guys spew hate at "queens" trying to show they're not "THAT gay" and "therefore better/acceptable").

Unfortunately it gets extreme, like out in the Caribbean where older men seducing and even raping underage girls is considered the "Caribbean way" (here in the US we call that "rape culture") while lynching gays. And I think it was only a few months ago where I read of a guy who tried to get off from manslaughter after he killed a teenage girl and seriously wounded the girl's mother while he was racing from the police in a fit of "road rage" which he said was brought on (and "understandable") as his morals was offended because he saw 2 women pretending to kiss, and yet the guy was a convicted sex offender who preyed on underage girls. And an expose catching the busting of people trying to meet up with underage girls in the USA revealed not only seemingly devout Christians but when they busted yet another Baptist preacher the comment was, "We're not even surprised anymore."

As for me a preacher told me when I was 13 (and learning I spent years on the outskirts of Houston) that his town didn't tolerate "punks from the big city" and he wouldn't allow me to corrupt his community. And yet that Bible Belt town he "defended" was where I FIRST (not Houston!) smoked pot, went to my first kegger (despite that it was a dry county in addition to nearly all of us underage, though it got raided by deputies which was the highlight as most of us got away!), tried shrooms (and had a giggling flashback in school that other kids recognized), saw porn, fooled around more than I ever did before, and fired a "borrowed" gun a boy wanted to teach me to shoot (and was lucky not to lose a finger too close to the ejection port). That is it was his Bible Belt town that did far more to corrupt ME than the other way around!

Oh, and as I was being dragged by my granny to leave the church where the preacher confronted me I marveled that a guy drove his truck out of there with a girl sucking on his face (in the church parking lot) and mentioning it to others they said the church was where people went to hook up ('course EVERYTHING social was based on the churches as there wasn't much else...) and the sermons as he gave that day on how horrid sex was REALLY got people horny and thinking dirty (in retrospect I suppose it's a predictable result after hearing a loud sermon going, "SEX! All these sinners having more fun than YOU! Now don't even THINK about it or you might as well have done/do it!")

[Miles]

I don't understand the appeal of Catholic guilt. It seems to me that most Catholics ignore much of the church anyway, but for some weird reason remain Catholic in name only, like this:

Haha, that describes my mother to a T.

[Matt]

This thread, is one of may reason why I am a recovering Catholic.