I've been quiet for a reason.....

[Beaux]

So what is this, attempted manslaughter?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Criminal_tr...ion_of_HIV

This is reckless - this ain't love, this is something far removed from love.

I just had a similar discussion with my roommate who is putting out ads saying he is drug and disease free. Such a lie can be a death sentence, and judges are cracking down on the spread of HIV by HIV+ people who know they are positive and still have sex with a negative person without telling that negative person their status.

Regardless of his reasons, this HIV status lie is way to big to let slide.

I can understand lying about a loved one who committed suicide, such a death is not something easy to talk about.


I have no idea what is going through his brain. This risk he posses to you is a serious risk and is not an act of love. He is purposefully having sex with you without protection when he knows he is positive and you are negative.

I strongly suggest you get the RNA test done for HIV. Go to your doctor and have them specifically test for the HIV genetic material (RNA is to viruses what DNA is to you). The antibodies test is not wholly accurate and only tests for the antibodies that may be present if you are infected. However low viral load means low antibodies and there may not be enough to get an accurate test from in your system.

I can understand why you didn't haul ass. I get that, but honestly, if he has lied about his status and is willing to infect you what else is he willing to do to you?

I fear that this is the type of lie you should not have to live with. I'm sorry. I know you have feelings for him, but apparently he doesn't have the proper feelings for you - real love does not place the one you love in such a terrible place with such incredibly horrible risks.

I really have to sleep SOON (I have been getting up at 4:30 am to make it to school and work on homework before class/ to get away from my husband and see him as little as possible), but I HAD to respond to your post; cause God can have a SOCK sense if humor. When we used the over-the -counter HIV tests, I got a false-positive. I am going to be honest with you: I came very close to killing myself that day.
Ray talked me into going into the doctor and getting on Atriple (an anti-viral) like he is taking. When I got there they insisted that I have an RNA test (along with two other kinds of tests for "mutations". Four days later I went back and found out I am negetive. I was so ecstatic that when they asked if I wanted to press charger against Ray, I said "no".
I honestly cannot say now if I think I should have pressed charger or not. I worry about him being let loose on an unsuspecting world..

"I know you dont care for me and my opinions..."
Mr. Tinkles,
Though we don't always agree, please don't believe that I have animosity or animus towards you. I have read many, many posts you have written that I thought were written with good intent and a loving soul. You have a good heart.
Beau

[Genersis]

That's crazy!

Please be very careful.
This all feels very wrong.
Perhaps that diary could be useful to the police you talked to?

Dreamer's idea isn't too bad either, taking legal action; and personally, I'd feel compelled to take action to stop him putting other's lives in danger.
Although I'd feel very embarrassed and feel it a bit too much on the personal side of things considering the subject matter; so in the end I guess it's how well it balances out in your eyes.

[SolemnBoy]

I'm sorry about all the terrible things that happened; it must have been very hard to deal with. It was extremely relieving getting to the end of it though and realizing that you somehow managed to evade an infection. I'm not sure how likely a transmission is but if you had unprotected sex for over a year I'm pretty sure you were very lucky in that regard.

I don't really know what the forum was like a few years ago, but based on some of the responses you've gotten, at least people are willing to be supportive! Keep telling your story if you feel better about getting it out!

[Kenny221]

Oh thank goodness you're safe! I'm just so glad you're okay Beaux. I know it's gonna take some time to recover from this, so take your time Beaux...it's okay to go quiet from time to time, we all have problems in our own lives. You just need to remember , no matter whose in the community, gayspeak will always support you with open arms.

[jimcrackcorn]

Beaux, I'm very glad you are OK........

Big HUGS
Jim

[Joshular]

I couldn't live with a liar :S
To me once a liar always a liar.
I'm glad you don't have HIV tho. And I wish you all the best for the future. My thoughts go out to you.

(Kiid)

[trialbyerror]

Hi Beaux
Thank you for having the trust and courage to share

Your anguish, sense of betrayal, apprehension, are all very clear. Again It's a privilege that you have opened up to me (and everybody else) thank you for your trust

Sorry you had to find out that your house you where building was just a house of cards...

I can only hope that like me, the telling helps you to come to terms with it, helps you to close the chapter and move on....

Please don't let that affect your faith in life and other people, I've gone that road It's a fucking dead end of loneliness...

Strength to you...




Trial...

[tavi]

Just to add to what everyone else has said im just so pleased your okay beaux and now you can look forward to good things

Ps ~ I trust you are finished with this careless fool, i think you should press charges, for what he did is attempted manslaughter but that is your choice and i imagine you just want things to return to normal, though the most important thing is your fine :-)

[Dreamer]

Four days later I went back and found out I am negetive. I was so ecstatic that when they asked if I wanted to press charger against Ray, I said "no".
I honestly cannot say now if I think I should have pressed charger or not. I worry about him being let loose on an unsuspecting world....

Understanding your blinded, enlightened state of relief from testing negative,
I'd urge you to reconsider not pressing charges.


I ask you, would you do the same had you tested positive?
Because the chances of you having done so could have easily not been in your favor.


He's committed the ultimate betrayal...
and that's placing his priorities and selfishness
over your health (your life potentially) and well being.


That's not love!


He's guaranteed to do it to others,
if he hasn't done so already.


Mere speculation,
but he probably cheats on you all the time,
given the fact he could give less than two shits about you
(and since honesty doesn't resonate with him naturally),
spreading this dreadful illness to unsuspecting others out there.


He's a literal danger to society!


He needs to be put in check for all the lives he has
and will continue to ruin.


I'm against the criminality of HIV,
when it's misused towards honest
hardworking people living with the virus
who have no ill will towards others,
in that regard,
because it happens way too often
by the hands of bitter, ignorant, dishonest individuals..


But your husband is not one of those people....


Not only has he failed to inform you of his status
(NOT ONCE since being with you),
but he's refused one of the most thoughtful efforts to reduce most,
if not all risks,
by using a condom!


I'd be lenient if he didn't tell you at first, and eventually did,
somewhere along your relationship,
but YOU FOUND OUT and he never anticipated telling you!


Given that he's seen FIRST HAND the devastation possible
by AIDS inflicted on his ex-boyfriend,
further angers me that he could care less.


He posed that same potential destiny onto you,
since, if you had contracted it from him,
you wouldn't have found out until it was too late!


Knowing all of this,
he continues to treat you like absolute shit!


He's a complete sociopathic scumbag!


Press charges,
and if you have any dignity left,
divorce and move on!


Sorry for coming off harsh,
but it's done with love,
not ridicule.

[Ryocchi]

All I can say is thank god you still have your health, whatever you decide to do now, I wish you happiness, not many have a second chance, please don't waste your life anymore in someone who doesn't love you.