Twin brother is not ok with my homosexuality and pretends he is. Why?

[Anonymous]

Actually I also thought about him being gay as well, because I read somewhere about this possibility of identical twins both being gay. He just had a girlfriend once and that's it. However I think he's straight.

[Vigilias]

Hello Anonymous!

Which anonymous are you, there are a few around here and I need to sort them all out in my lil blond head! lol

Okay, down to business...

I've scanned quickly the responses to your post, I prefer to stick my oar in without clouding my thoughts with the thoughts of others. It's just the way I work.

From what I can gather, the general consensus seems to be that your brother will come round in time, that you should give him the space and the time he needs. In the meantime, your missing your brother and the close relationship you once enjoyed.

He doesn't bring up the subject himself, he says he has no feelings, thoughts or desire to discuss the matter and when you bring it up he shuts you down quickly. That's a little unfair but he's your brother so you will of course forgive him - of course you will!

How about writing him a letter, telling him pretty much what you've told us here? Leave it where he can find it. Who could resist reading a letter or a note that mysteriously materializes right where we're bound to see it? Tell him how you miss your relationship with him. Could any family members help? Are you out to family and what is their position on the matter?

Your boyfriend sounds supporting and sensible - sounds like a keeper!

Whatever happens, don't keep us in suspenders, let us know how you're getting on.

Hope it all goes well for you!

[Vigilias]

As for the possibility of him also being gay, yes it can happen, but so can many things from missed appointments to meteor strikes, and you have enough to think about at the moment without speculating on your brothers sexuality.

First things first... you have to build the foundations before you put the roof on!

[ardus]

Not being a twin myself I can't claim to understand how you feel, but a good friend of mine told me that he was closer to his twin sister than anyone in the world.

I imagine it must be very difficult to suddenly lose that closeness.

I think most of the people who've responded are probably right, his reaction seems to me like he's hurt and having a hard time dealing with it.
How long since he found out?

Richard

[Anonymous]

Not very long time since he found out, maybe a month or so.

[Tulloni]

I know a couple of gay twins. Both identical but they have different builds. One's slim and one has some weight on him but they're both great guys on the whole. Both gay but get on alright. I don't know many identical twins though so I don't know how they would think. I've got a brother, we're 2 years apart though and very different physically. We don't even have the same hair colour.

Well maybe he'll come around sometime? It was messy coming out to my family and my brother but it was alright in the end. He's got to grow up and understand at the end of the day and as your twin brother (who tend to be even closer than non-twin brothers) he should be a bit more sympathetic.

Sorry I don't mean to sound blunt. I can be like that sometimes but he must come round to the idea. I wouldn't mind if my brother started dating, for example, a black girl so why should he care if you're going out with another guy?