My name is Tim. 20-years-old.
Since couple of days I've accepted myself as a gay man and told to my friend. It is interesting thing - when you stoping denying your orientation in yourself and accept completely you for yoursel, in your mind. As fully as you are. I'm just figuring out it, because before I was trying to not thinking about it, just forget, put on away. But last months I was thinking a lot about my life, my future and I finally decided: if I'm a gay - it is ok, just accept it and live, and now I'm trying to integrate more to this, actually, MY community. And that's why I'm here. I've registered for following discussions, ask questions, understanding some things and meet with new people and other staff. If you have questions, will be happy answer or help.
My English is not so good, so don't beat me for that :-) I'm trying improve it.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
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Welcome, Tim! If you think your English is bad, you should see me write in Russian! 
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Congratulations...It seems that the more people one tells, the more comfortable one becomes. This is a good place for talking to people about your problems, making friends, and learning English...
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TimU Wrote:My name is Tim. 20-years-old.
Since couple of days I've accepted myself as a gay man and told to my friend. It is interesting thing - when you stoping denying your orientation in yourself and accept completely you for yoursel, in your mind. As fully as you are. I'm just figuring out it, because before I was trying to not thinking about it, just forget, put on away. But last months I was thinking a lot about my life, my future and I finally decided: if I'm a gay - it is ok, just accept it and live, and now I'm trying to integrate more to this, actually, MY community. And that's why I'm here. I've registered for following discussions, ask questions, understanding some things and meet with new people and other staff. If you have questions, will be happy answer or help.
My English is not so good, so don't beat me for that :-) I'm trying improve it.
From a guy from Central Asia your English is astounding, sir..
welcome to GS, feel fre to adress us about any issue or question  mile:
I have one question myself..isn't Central Asia less than friendly towards homosexuality, or does Kyrgystan falls far form their neighbours?..
I ask because more than one Kazakh and Georgian has come here for help in getting out of their country due to death threats..
Are you in any possible danger? Let us know
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Thanks a lot, guys! You're so welcoming. I'm lucky that I'm here. It's so interesting, big forum, including any questions. Feel myself as at home :-)
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Quote:I have ione question myself..isn't Central Asia less than friendly towards homosexuality, or does Kyrgystan falls far form their neighbours?..
I ask because more than one Kazakh and Georgian has come here for help in getting ou tof their country due to deatn threats..
Are you in any possible danger? Let us know
Unfortunately, in general in all of the five Central Asia countries situation with LGBT is worst. In Kyrgyzstan and Kazakhstan it's a little bit better than in rest, but LGBT have to hide themselves. In Kyrgyzstan society doesn't understand us and it encourages violence vis-a-vis LGBT. LGBT can't dating in public places, can't show their orientation, can't publish their images in dating, meet for web-sites. In the capital - Bishkek city, where I'm live, and one or two big other cities, LGBT have chances to find partners,. But trying to find partner - it is a big risk. Sometimes policemen register at dating web-site as a gay, but when they dating, policmen take gays to their office and say: or you give me money now, or I'm going to call your parents, school, university and say about your orientation. Most of people think that homosexuality is a disease and try to treat. Other parents just say: you're not my son/daughter anymore and go away. But also sometimes parents accept, it's very rarely. Basically, gays in Kyrgyzstan lie about their true orientation, because it's dangerous for your health, and also for your life too. And, unfortunately, that Kazakh boy was right.
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TimU Wrote:Unfortunately, in general in all of the five Central Asia countries situation with LGBT is worst. In Kyrgyzstan and Kazakhstan it's a little bit better than in rest, but LGBT have to hide themselves. In Kyrgyzstan society doesn't understand us and it encourages violence vis-a-vis LGBT. LGBT can't dating in public places, can't show their orientation, can't publish their images in dating, meet for web-sites. In the capital - Bishkek city, where I'm live, and one or two big other cities, LGBT have chances to find partners,. But trying to find partner - it is a big risk. Sometimes policemen register at dating web-site as a gay, but when they dating, policmen take gays to their office and say: or you give me money now, or I'm going to call your parents, school, university and say about your orientation. Most of people think that homosexuality is a disease and try to treat. Other parents just say: you're not my son/daughter anymore and go away. But also sometimes parents accept, it's very rarely. Basically, gays in Kyrgyzstan lie about their true orientation, because it's dangerous for your health, and also for your life too. And, unfortunately, that Kazakh boy was right.
Well, if you run into trouble, you can enter into some more modern countries as a refugee. If you choose to do this but have no money for legal assistance in Canada, our charter of rights and freedoms does in fact protect anyone on Canadian soil, and a lawyer will be provided for you. It's difficult, and an infamous story in Canada is that a gay man recorded himself doing a gay sexual act to prove he was gay to obtain refuge status in Canada. You could also emigrate to such a country, if your home life is too difficult. This is a slower process, and also very difficult, but more certain  .
The police do sound scary though, I hope you are careful in regards to finding possible partners, use a proxy server if you watch things you're not supposed to, that kind of stuff. I'm not sure of any ways to foil the police off the top of my head, but perhaps you could look only at people you connect with as friends first in regards to gay dating (if you take a long time in developing a relationship, I imagine you would get to know a person and notice if something is unusual about them), and demand proof of identity (such as Facebook with clearly active friends who in turn have active friends)? A facebook account, in my opinion, can be used to validate a person's identity if they have enough information open, since they'd have to make hundreds of fake accounts and then have friends for their friends account to convincingly pull a fake. And if you ever get caught with a guy at your house, obviously he's renting a room.
If you decide to try dating, think of things like that. Police men are not infallible, and they're lucky I'm not a criminal  .
Your society does also have potential to change. The parents who do accept their children, and the friends of LGBT, are going to be motivated to stop homophobia. So if you stay in your country, you might eventually see a younger generation where more and more people don't have to hide. Which doubtless will be bitter sweet, but, I think if I were an older LGBT person, and I got to see the world turn into a place where people younger than me could live openly, happily, it would be a very emotional thing for me.
Either way, I hope you continue on with your life. If someone ever asks why you don't have a girlfriend in your job or whatever, you could always pull a, "To be honest, I had a horrible accident...down there... ".. , tell them to mind their own business, say you had one and she got hit by a space ship, make it funny if you can.
Again, thanks for joining our forums.
OH
PS IF YOU DECIDE TO RANDOMLY DISAPPEAR TELL US WHERE YOU WENT SO WE DON'T WORRY YOU DIED OR SOMETHING.
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Kumawool
Thanks a lot for your support and advices!
I said above that I'm new in LGBT, and I know only general information about it. But also I heard that in Bishkek working a strong LGBT community who supports gays, lesbians and etc. Sitation is very bad and dangerous but every year step by step some politics, human rights, MPs, even president talking a little bit about problems with LGBT. And I think that if LGBT community and other organisations keep supporting gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgenders, situation with a little steps, but going to change. We just should hard work on that.
On local web sites most of gays are publishing not their real images and names, because it doesn't security. And you really couldn't know: is this user true gay or it's policeman or mad person who triying to treat you. But I don't know how often does it happen.
Our people changing: learning English language, go abroad, meet new friends from west countries, watching new movies and ect. Globalisation influence on us too, and maybe a little bit people in KGZ, but they understand LGBT, support. When abroad LGBT communitites try to talk about rights, marriage, adopts and etc., our people watching it and it's true, a lot of local people don't accept it, they think it's madness. but also a little part of people think: why not? they are look as we, we believe in one God and they tried to understand us. So, I think, that LGBT will be accepted in KGZ, but it takes time. Maybe 5 or 10, maybe 20 years. It depends on activity local communities and how often this question will be on top in the world, I think. I'm actually optimistic.
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