Hey there guys! I'm Junior its my first time here, and I was reading something and end up here, my problem is the following...For some reason it seems I'm not relationship material, I don't know whats wrong with me (or the guys I date) but almost anything move foward, it would be with me or its really general with you guys all?
I mean I kind feel its ME, like I'm not pretty enough or kind enogh, Well actually after a couple of years I'm kind of feeling hopeless, hahaha.
I mean its really that hard of find a LTR/Relationship? Or its just me? I'm ugly? I'm too far away? I'm unavailable? WTF is going on?
Thankyou y'all already! 
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Gotta kiss a lot of frogs before you meet a prince.... or a half decent human being.
Yes it is that hard for a gay male to find a relationship with another gay man. Figure we are about 1% of the population, that means for every 100 males you meet, one will be gay - then figure that finding a gay male who is compatible is going to be like what one in a thousand? So that its going to be at least 100,000 males of the species you have to meet.
Some times one is lucky, sometimes one is not.
You're only 22 - so you still got a lot of time ahead of you. This isn't a race, take your time, meet guys, date and hold on to your ideas of finding a suitable mate.
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Obviously you are not alone, hehe.. There are lots of Single Gay men in the world and you just have to find the right one for you..
And we are young, we can enjoy our singlehood.. Romance will come when its our time and if we are ready  i dont wanna hear the word "hopeless" from a 22 year old guy, haha
And dont say you are not pretty or kind enough, a person will soon come who would appreciate your totality..
Anyway before anything else, are you closeted? Have you had previous relationships??
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Stop looking so hard.
BF material usually happens when you least expect it.
ObW
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Actually it isn't hard to find if you make a conscious effort to find them.
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Bowyn Aerrow Wrote:Gotta kiss a lot of frogs before you meet a prince.... or a half decent human being.
Yes it is that hard for a gay male to find a relationship with another gay man. Figure we are about 1% of the population, that means for every 100 males you meet, one will be gay - then figure that finding a gay male who is compatible is going to be like what one in a thousand? So that its going to be at least 100,000 males of the species you have to meet.
Some times one is lucky, sometimes one is not.
You're only 22 - so you still got a lot of time ahead of you. This isn't a race, take your time, meet guys, date and hold on to your ideas of finding a suitable mate.
Gosh, you're pessimistic :o
We're about 5%, you're exagerating :p
On those, lets say, half is top, the other half is bottom, so 2.5% left.
On those, about 20% are in your age criteria, so we're at 0.5%
On those, maybe 40% (if you're not difficult) will appeal you, so 0.2%
On those, you will appeal on half of them, so 0.1%
For a sex friend, you have about 0.1% of population suitable.
On those, 60% of dumbasses, who don't share at all your interest so about 0.04%
On those, maybe 30% who don't share your relationship vision, so more or less 0.025%
On those, 50% who can't share the flat (different vision of hygiena or whatever)
So don't worry, we arrive at 0.1 per mil who can be in a relationship with you. Much more than 1/100,000. :p
EDIT : I forgot half of men and those who are already in a relationship, stupid I am 
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2 brazilians over the 3 I know who came at my college are gay, so maybe, it's a bit more in Brazil :p
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brazilian Wrote:Hey there guys! I'm Junior its my first time here, and I was reading something and end up here, my problem is the following...For some reason it seems I'm not relationship material, I don't know whats wrong with me (or the guys I date) but almost anything move foward, it would be with me or its really general with you guys all?
I mean I kind feel its ME, like I'm not pretty enough or kind enogh, Well actually after a couple of years I'm kind of feeling hopeless, hahaha.
I mean its really that hard of find a LTR/Relationship? Or its just me? I'm ugly? I'm too far away? I'm unavailable? WTF is going on?
Thankyou y'all already!
Do you truly believe that all the couples you will meet in your life are a match in heaven? Or that everything is blue skies and red roses? Yes you came here and you can read that many are in a relationship but is it all as beautiful as you believe it to be?
If you read some of my text you will find that I'm actually married to my dude, have been 8 years together and that we have 6 children. Now is it true, is it false, is it just a story that I keep for the Internet? It doesn't matter to me whether you believe it or not. You're not part of my private circle so there's no way for you to know.
Few months ago I had the very same pseudonym account ("Jake" which is my real name diminutive - only my mom call me by my real name and it's normally when she's pissed off at me hahahaha) and in that account I had pictures of myself and my husband who also used to have an account on this forum. Unfortunately I have learned that sometimes it's better to keep stuff for oneself, my husband is a former model, the typical blond Australian twink/jock like dude that gay porn sites like Boycrush and 8teenboys would die to have in their farm of models. Now some individuals decided to do a picture search on my husband - why? Well because for them it looked too good to be true that I had such a cutie as a husband so they wanted to find out for themselves if I was just not pulling their legs... and they did find some, in some he was name Trevor, other he was Devon, Mike, Simon etc etc. You get the picture. In fact Alex model's name is Tyler and he always have been known as Tyler in the modeling world and yes he had a website and its pictures were plastered across the web making it easy for pretty much everyone to grab them and modify them or re-post them in picture blogs.
What shocked me and make me leave is all the hypocrite comments from some people that often are trying the be the greatest adviser and yet when they can kick you down they will out of envy or jealousy.
So what's all that's story about regarding your post? Stop judging yourself the way you're doing it right now, stop doubting of your qualifications, there's plenty of people who will voluntarily put you down you don't need to provide them any reasons to be right because when you do that's when you're loosing confidence in yourself and you have them win... but what are they winning? NOTHING! But you sure lose a lot for not believing in yourself and keeps on pulling yourself down.
Relationship isn't easy to find and it isn't easy to maintain either. As I said earlier it's not always blue skies and red roses, Alex and I who have been together for a long time are quite often falling on each other's nerves for any sort of stupid reasons, but what always makes it up is that we truly loves each other, it's not just a matter of coming online and saying... look I have a supermodel as a boyfriend, if his beauty was the only thing that keeps us together, I'd say we were not in a real relationship.
So you want to find the right guy? Well it will take time, patience and humility. It will also take you much more confidence then what you're displaying right now. Forget about the calculation of 1/100 gay finding a boyfriend and focus on showing a positive attitude toward yourself. Negativeness is quickly sense by human beings and it will often be that simple little aspect that may kill your chances of not finding the right person.
It can take months, years or a decade before you truly find the one that will rock your world, but in-between if you're scared of being hurt this will lower your chances because unfortunately you will be hurt in this venture no matter what.
Also a word of advice, if you have some sort of a LGBT club close to you, go there, visit them, get involve by offering your time, make friends. Online dating may be the most spread ways to find a boyfriend, but honestly - and I speak of experience, I never was able to find the right guy from dating sites. Because on dating sites everyone are displaying a "fictitious/margin of reality" character that is truly not what they are... even I when I had my profiles ups on those sites wasn't myself. I found Alex - well in fact he came to me... because I would have never have the nerves to approach such guy because just like you I lack confidence back then, I knew I wasn't an ugly guy, but to me THAT guy was way over my league, just to find out that we actually were both a match in heaven - if such place exist hahaha.
Yeah my dude used to be a supermodel, but the funny part of that... so was I lol I used to model for United Colors of Benetton and other clothing companies... but my confidence was very low, there was many guys I was attracted too in my agency but was to scared to make the first steps or even approaching them in a friendly way. I thought of them as being too beautiful or that I had nothing to offer... yet I had a lot to offer and this wasn't just sexual or physical.
So dude rise up, start believing in yourself, start showing your qualifications, don't over do it but don't be scared of showing your true colors from the very beginning... be a peacock but don't be too flamboyant... keep some feathers hidden and show them when you feel the moment has arrived to deploy your whole wings.
That's my advice, make what you want of it
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Ekwarph Wrote:Gosh, you're pessimistic :o
We're about 5%, you're exagerating :p
On those, lets say, half is top, the other half is bottom, so 2.5% left.
On those, about 20% are in your age criteria, so we're at 0.5%
On those, maybe 40% (if you're not difficult) will appeal you, so 0.2%
On those, you will appeal on half of them, so 0.1%
For a sex friend, you have about 0.1% of population suitable.
On those, 60% of dumbasses, who don't share at all your interest so about 0.04%
On those, maybe 30% who don't share your relationship vision, so more or less 0.025%
On those, 50% who can't share the flat (different vision of hygiena or whatever)
So don't worry, we arrive at 1 per mil who can be in a relationship with you. Much more than 1/100,000. :p
Hahaha well actually that kind of make sense and can you belive I never had to think in those terms? We are really fewer then the straight ones, so actually makes sense its even hard to find "the one".
But like think about it, you are for example there is just "gay guys" almost everyone is looking for a relationship, and not hookups, and even this way, its really hard.
I even stoped of look here in Brazil, I'm in the level "WORLD" right now hahahaha
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brazilian Wrote:Hahaha well actually that kind of make sense and can you belive I never had to think in those terms? We are really fewer then the straight ones, so actually makes sense its even hard to find "the one".
But like think about it, you are for example there is just "gay guys" almost everyone is looking for a relationship, and not hookups, and even this way, its really hard.
I even stoped of look here in Brazil, I'm in the level "WORLD" right now hahahaha
http://www.ted.com/talks/amy_webb_how_i_...ating.html
Look at this video, that made me LMAO ! 
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