Would it be easier..?

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Easier? Doubtful. Different, definitely.

[SilverFrost]

I don't know if being straight is easier than being gay, but I can only speak from my own point of view as a straight person, so I'm not expert in this. I just think everyone, no matter what label they are under, have problems. Which problem is worse than the other? Just thinking...

My answer is "yes, it would be easier" but if I got to choose, I would still choose to be gay again.
I don't hate women but I find most of their activities boring. I like doing physical demanding activities (working out, hiking, trekking, etc) while most (not all) of the women don't. And many women like to think that men should be providers. I don't really like this idea. I like everyone to be as equal as possible. It's just my personal opinion though.

And then I read this... *sigh* This kind of opinions make me sad and disappointed, because it's not the only one and basically, to me this once again sounds like "eww women". Besides I can survive without a man providing me living, I'd rather be equal with my bf and so far so good... But I better stop now, before I start ranting.

[NerdyGiant]

I honestly believe I would be happier if I was straight... Every guy that has shown interest in me, or I have shown interest in, has hurt me in many different ways. I've been used, lied to, dumped for exes, betrayed, and assaulted on the verge of something worse on many occasions... Yet the women that have shown interest in me were genuinely amazing people that I found attractive for their personality, and have moved on to long lasting relationships and are living in a happily ever after state of mind. If I was straight I wouldn't be single most likely, I wouldn't get hurt as much, and I wouldn't be as f***ed up.

It doesn't help that the "gay culture" in my city, and especially for my age group (18-30) is full of backstabbing, hookups, sabotage, and just awful people in general.

[Ekwarph]

I honestly believe I would be happier if I was straight... Every guy that has shown interest in me, or I have shown interest in, has hurt me in many different ways. I've been used, lied to, dumped for exes, betrayed, and assaulted on the verge of something worse on many occasions... Yet the women that have shown interest in me were genuinely amazing people that I found attractive for their personality, and have moved on to long lasting relationships and are living in a happily ever after state of mind. If I was straight I wouldn't be single most likely, I wouldn't get hurt as much, and I wouldn't be as f***ed up.

It doesn't help that the "gay culture" in my city, and especially for my age group (18-30) is full of backstabbing, hookups, sabotage, and just awful people in general.

Sorry, I'm gonna be straightforward. Not sure being gay is the reason. You just met the wrong ones who don't share your point of view.
Why are you (and others who have the same opinion) complaining about the fact that gays are not for long relationship? Probably you're the only gay in the world who's over ? It's just bullshits. Not even worse than straight people. But you know, it's easy to say that it's because of gays that I'm not okay.

Nothing against you, you're very far from being the only one complaining about that kind of things...but that kind of remarks tend to annoy me...it's always easy to blame everybody but oneself and it clearly doesn't make things easier for you.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

My answer is "yes, it would be easier" but if I got to choose, I would still choose to be gay again.
I don't hate women but I find most of their activities boring. I like doing physical demanding activities (working out, hiking, trekking, etc) while most (not all) of the women don't. And many women like to think that men should be providers. I don't really like this idea. I like everyone to be as equal as possible. It's just my personal opinion though.

Yeah I almost agree.

Look, when you can pass a 7-10 pound baby from between your legs, breast feed it and deal with the 3 am feedings and nasty stuff these parasites leave in the diapers, then you may start to understand why women want to be 'stay at home' moms in the traditional sense.

The whole 'two career' family thing has destroyed families and society. TV became a babysitter for a generation of Latch-key kids, and society has suffered. I watched the whole damn thing spiral downward.

Like it or not for thousands upon thousands of years the whole Mom stays at home to tend the hearth and home and fed the kids while dad goes off to hunt buffalo or mine metals or plow the field worked very, very well to insure the survival of the species and lead to the whole of civilization to continually progress until the 1960's when Women were liberated and no one wanted to stay at home to raise the kids then everything went south from that point forward.

True equality in this would be that Mom goes out to earn the bacon and Dad stays home to deal with the dirty diapers, clean the house and fry up that bacon. We ain't seeing enough of that and now three generations of kids have been raised less than human.

And I hate to burst your bubble, human beings are NOT equal. We each have our own skill set and abilities. Tell me, when is the last time you brought down a deer with a #50 bow? (8 years ago was the last time for me). Do you know how to preserve a hide with the brains of your kill? No - well gee where is this equality thing because I most certainly do know how to preserve a hide with the brains. How many chickens have you removed the head from and cleaned and gutted then cooked up for a Sunday meal? Do you even know how to gut a chicken without making everyone sick?

Violinists, pianists, Sculptors, Carpenters, Welders, Medical Doctors.... Equal? Where exactly are they equal aside from everyone being books of blood for when they are opened they are red?

This whole notion that humans are equal defies the notion that each human being is unique. You can't have it both ways.

Just because a person stays at home and tends to hearth and home does not make them less than everyone else. It does not lessen them as a human being and until such time as I can sterilize your species, there is a need to have at least one parent to rear the next generation of useless eaters you call 'humans'. It is a tradition that worked well for 150,000 or more years.

[NerdyGiant]

Sorry, I'm gonna be straightforward. Not sure being gay is the reason. You just met the wrong ones who don't share your point of view.
Why are you (and others who have the same opinion) complaining about the fact that gays are not for long relationship? Probably you're the only gay in the world who's over ? It's just bullshits. Not even worse than straight people. But you know, it's easy to say that it's because of gays that I'm not okay.

Nothing against you, you're very far from being the only one complaining about that kind of things...but that kind of remarks tend to annoy me...it's always easy to blame everybody but oneself and it clearly doesn't make things easier for you.

Did I ever say that gay guys aren't for long relationships? No. I'm saying that all the ones I meet typically just want sex, that's a fact based on my experiences. And every guy I meet that wants a relationship already has someone. And I don't get what you are trying to say by "it's easy to say it's because of gays", it's easy to say because that is what I have experienced. Have you experienced what I have? No. Guys around my age that show interest in me just want to get me in bed, the back of their car, or a bathroom stall.

And I'd like to hear what I should blame myself about. You say I'm blaming others yet I'm only drawing upon my experiences and what I have been through. What have I done wrong essentially? I'd say the worst I've done is like the wrong guys, but that's because I'm looking for a relationship. I'm sorry if it's such a bad thing to try and find love that doesn't involve sex and only sex.

I'm saying that I wouldn't get the same s*** if I was straight. I wouldn't have women trying to assault me and rip my clothes off. In comparing the women and men that have been interested in me, I would be happier being straight because at least the women that have shown interest me were good people. Not saying I wouldn't get heartbroken or hurt, just saying it would be an easier and overall happier life with less drama most likely.

[southbiochem]

The whole 'two career' family thing has destroyed families and society. TV became a babysitter for a generation of Latch-key kids, and society has suffered. I watched the whole damn thing spiral downward.

I will disagree with you here...2 career families have little to do with how kids turn out to be and a lot to do with the quality of the parents

How do I know this...look at me, Bowyn...would you say, overall, I turned out bad?..

well, my mom fought my grandma to be able to go to college and not be a housewife...both her and my dad had jobs and we didn't see much of them, at first we were left with grams, but since age 5, mom taught my sis and me to be self-sufficient and here we are...

And then I read this... *sigh* This kind of opinions make me sad and disappointed, because it's not the only one and basically, to me this once again sounds like "eww women". Besides I can survive without a man providing me living, I'd rather be equal with my bf and so far so good... But I better stop now, before I start ranting.

if it helps, Frosty, a lot of women are far superior than me, my mom being one of such women...and I have no trouble admiting it

I really don't know what does being gay or straight have to do with hiking or other "manly" activities or not, I really didn't understand DanK's comment..

[Ekwarph]

And I'd like to hear what I should blame myself about. You say I'm blaming others yet I'm only drawing upon my experiences and what I have been through. What have I done wrong essentially? I'd say the worst I've done is like the wrong guys, but that's because I'm looking for a relationship. I'm sorry if it's such a bad thing to try and find love that doesn't involve sex and only sex.

I'm saying that I wouldn't get the same s*** if I was straight. I wouldn't have women trying to assault me and rip my clothes off. In comparing the women and men that have been interested in me, I would be happier being straight because at least the women that have shown interest me were good people. Not saying I wouldn't get heartbroken or hurt, just saying it would be an easier and overall happier life with less drama most likely.

You took what I said in the wrong way.. The main thing I meant is that being straight couldn't have arranged things. My own opinion. You just don't see it cause you see from an external look. It's easy to say that it's because you're gay whereas it's because you didn't find the right person.
Each time it doesn't work there are in most cases 2 responsibles, so as most people did on this planet, you probably did something wrong.

It's my opinion. I would say that to anybody, and not only you.

[Festino]

When i talked about this with my crush i made him cry lol (guess he would rather be straight, idk), i think it would be simplier, because society (where i live at least) makes being gay hard.

If i was straight i know i would have been a stud since middle school, with so many girls coming at me alas i had the unsavory duty of turning them down, not for me, i could have faked love with all those girls, pretty girls, it was for their sake, i will never fake love, nor will i cheat on someone.

On the other hand i get a huge boost of confidence being gay, its something in the back of my mind all the time i am working or studying i think to myself "Im so cool and being gay makes me cooler".

In a way (closet way) im proud of being gay and if i got to choose i wouldnt change it.

[Woollyhats]

If I had not been gay I would not have developed my critical thinking or ability to have a positive outlook enough to survive what life has thrown at me, I am consistently the one that has remained calm in my family following crisis after crisis, the ability to do so comes largely from learning to trust and control myself while I was closeted with an abusive parent for many years. On the off chance that we're assuming not being gay magically stopped the abuse, realize now that I'm an ultra conservative fundamentalist, because my critical thinking skills never developed after I asked, "Am I really an evil person?" while coming to terms with myself. I would also not have learned to push myself, I would have far lower expectations of myself, and I would expect less from myself. I would have given up on school long ago, and would likely have joined the army to escape my family and related problems, and probably gotten into drugs like my brother (before he quit, anyway).

So, to answer the question of if not being gay makes life for me easier, I think that on the contrary, if I had not been gay (or come to terms with being gay), I suspect my life, and the life of everyone around me, would have been a lot more difficult. And while I'm not exactly happy, I've mastered the ability to grapple with my emotions and reach a state of relative calm inside of myself.

Being gay might only be a part of who I am, but it's influenced every aspect of my character, it has made me who I am today, and I'm not going to lie, I don't have the easiest life. I don't really get to have the novelty of saying whether it would be easier, or harder. I only have the reality to say that had I not been gay, and handled it in the way I did, I honestly don't think I would have been able cope.