A series of one liners
Sagittarius
02-25-2014, 11:31 AM
"I had a car crash the other day. A dwarf got out the other car and said, 'I'm not happy'. To which I replied, 'Which one are you then."
"I swallowed some Tippex last night. Woke up with a massive correction."
"What's the difference between a woman and a terrorist? You can negotiate with a terrorist."
"Two cannibals eating a clown. One says, 'Does this taste funny to you?'"
"Two goldfish in a tank. One says to the other: 'How do you start this thing?'"
"My wife went out shopping and brought home the escalator. It was marked down."
"What do you call a law student who tries to sue himself? Self tort."
"Two dogs walking down the street. 1st dog: "Do you use condoms?" 2nd dog: "Durex" 1st dog: "I asked you first."
"What do you call a teacher with no arms, no legs, and no body? The Head."
"I swallowed some Tippex last night. Woke up with a massive correction."
"What's the difference between a woman and a terrorist? You can negotiate with a terrorist."
"Two cannibals eating a clown. One says, 'Does this taste funny to you?'"
"Two goldfish in a tank. One says to the other: 'How do you start this thing?'"
"My wife went out shopping and brought home the escalator. It was marked down."
"What do you call a law student who tries to sue himself? Self tort."
"Two dogs walking down the street. 1st dog: "Do you use condoms?" 2nd dog: "Durex" 1st dog: "I asked you first."
"What do you call a teacher with no arms, no legs, and no body? The Head."
"You can be young without money but you can't be old without money"
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
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