Why? Life's inponderables

[LONDONER]

Why do supermarkets make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front?

Why do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke?

Why do banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters?

Why do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in our driveways and put our useless junk in the garage?

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavoring, and dish washing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff??

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

[NayNay]

I am pretty sure I can put mascara on with my mouth closed lol

[MisterTinkles]

Why do supermarkets make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front?
Because they want you to get sick, so you have to walk through the store to get stuff for that hacking cough you get from smoking.

Why do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke?
Because there is no such thing as a diet cheeseburger and diet fries.

Why do banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters?
Because money cant roll off a counter top.

Why do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in our driveways and put our useless junk in the garage?
Because our useless junk cant be replaced, unlike a car.

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Because we would all look like Michael Jackson (when alive) if it were reversed.

Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
For the same reason men cannot lower the lid after peeing.

Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
Because they can prevent the news from being advertised, so they don't have thousands of "relatives" and "friends" show up at their door.

Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?
Cause they wanted to hear you complain.


Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?
Cause they aint got it right.......yet.

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavoring, and dish washing liquid made with real lemons?
Well, you could drink the dish washing liquid, but then you would need one of those doctors who are just practicing.

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Because if you end up making money and cashing in, he gets broker.

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Because people are in a rush to get to a stand still on the highways at 5:15pm.

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Because then there would have to be cat flavored dog food. And who wants THAT?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
He was too busy cleaning up elephant and hippo poop.

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Human stupidity knows no bounds..

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff??
Because that would make sense. Have you EVER known ANY company that used any sense when making something?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
They do, you just dont notice.

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
Hmmmm.........ok, you got me on that one.

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
Just IN CASE you dont make it.

[trialbyerror]

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Because then there would have to be cat flavored dog food. And who wants THAT?.[/B]

Common tinkles, arn't you just a tad biased here?...:biggrin:

[MisterTinkles]

Common tinkles, arn't you just a tad biased here?...:biggrin:

ME???

BIASED??????


Why would you think I would bitch slap you for that?????