05-03-2014, 03:40 AM
So a few months ago I became interested in gay dating. I think I even made a thread about it too. Well since then, I decided to give it a try and download a few gay dating apps. Grindr kinda sucked so I used Hornet instead (which also sucks, but it's better than the others). I met a guy who I thought was pretty cute and he also seemed really interested in gaming and Japanese culture, which I also really like. I think we exchanged friendly messages for a solid month before I asked him if he wanted to add me on Facebook. He agreed and we continued talking on there. It was all just friendly conversation and occasional advice on being gay since he seemed more experienced than me. He's had a boyfriend before and at the time was single. I wanted to meet up with him, but he said he was busy with working two jobs and taking college courses. But since the semester is over for both of us, we both have much more free time in the summer; perfect chance to finally meet. But today, as I logged onto Facebook, BOOM!! In a Relationship! It was the very first thing I saw......and now I'm bummed.
Now I mentioned before that I've never been in a relationship or even made much of an effort to pursue one. I'm a really introverted and shy person who's also really picky when it comes to people I deem worthy of my attention. I've been trying to become more social and outgoing, but it's a working progress. So I'm just thinking to myself, if I was interested in this guy on a relationship level, what could I have done better? Like I said, all our conversations were just friendly stuff. I don't think I ever made any moves or anything, I wanted to be his friend and meet him face to face before I just moved in on him. I'm always afraid of coming off as some kind of creep and I don't know how to be subtle with flirting, so I just be friendly. Is that my problem? Should I have pushed to meet him sooner than just waiting until summer when our schedules were freed up? I mean obviously he had enough time to see this other guy, so maybe it could've worked? Maybe my problem was getting my hopes up. Maybe I should've just thought of him as a friend first and foremost. I don't plan on just dropping him now that he's in a relationship or anything, I still wanna meet him at some point. Maybe he knows some other guys I could meet. Who knows? But in hindsight, what could I have done better if I wanted this guy as more than a friend? If I ever meet another cute guy who likes video games and geeky stuff, what could I do differently?
Now I mentioned before that I've never been in a relationship or even made much of an effort to pursue one. I'm a really introverted and shy person who's also really picky when it comes to people I deem worthy of my attention. I've been trying to become more social and outgoing, but it's a working progress. So I'm just thinking to myself, if I was interested in this guy on a relationship level, what could I have done better? Like I said, all our conversations were just friendly stuff. I don't think I ever made any moves or anything, I wanted to be his friend and meet him face to face before I just moved in on him. I'm always afraid of coming off as some kind of creep and I don't know how to be subtle with flirting, so I just be friendly. Is that my problem? Should I have pushed to meet him sooner than just waiting until summer when our schedules were freed up? I mean obviously he had enough time to see this other guy, so maybe it could've worked? Maybe my problem was getting my hopes up. Maybe I should've just thought of him as a friend first and foremost. I don't plan on just dropping him now that he's in a relationship or anything, I still wanna meet him at some point. Maybe he knows some other guys I could meet. Who knows? But in hindsight, what could I have done better if I wanted this guy as more than a friend? If I ever meet another cute guy who likes video games and geeky stuff, what could I do differently?