Seeking Wisdom

[James]

So are you finding what you are looking for, or can we halp more?

[gilhooly]

You are doing a good job. I came out to my parents in 1956. My parents were pagans and cheered me on. I fell in love with about 50 boys by 16. I was a very cute boy. About 40 boys swore the would love me forever.

By 30 I had attended weddings for most of my former lovers. I loved going to weddings so I stayed friends with these guys. My parents loved and accepted me and I adore them to this day.

I was not going through a phase. Many of my friends were definitely going through a phase and became good straight parents with a good attitude about gays and lesbians.

Tell your daughter you love her but try not to direct her. Let her stumble, grumble and mumble her way with sex. No one knows for certain how your daughter will end up.

Avoid blame and guilt for everyone. People should be adults and accept facts when they have been determined. 13 is a little young for certainty. I fell hopelessly in love with one guy when I was 22. We stayed together for life. My parents honorarily adopted him. They loved Tom as much as I did.

It takes awhile to be certain. Stay calm and deal quietly with the fallout. I wish you luck. No matter what you do, you will be criticized by someone. Keep and protect your relationship with your daughter. She is permanent, not a visitor in your life.

GOOD LUCK
John

[learning1]

So are you finding what you are looking for, or can we halp more?

Everyone on here has been helpful. I am still waiting for the minister I told you about to call. I have tried taking to my daughter about it, but she is finding it to be too awkward, so I have backed off. I plan to just let things develop and be there for her as needed. What else is there to do at this point?

[HumbleTangerine]

I just wanted to add that anyone who's ready to come out at such a young age obviously trusts their parents very much. It's pretty unusual for LGBT teens so you must have done a really good job as parents!

[James]

You have done much already, looking for the right answers and ways to support your daughter. My hats off to you as parents, give it time as you say, but be there when she finally does need to talk about it. Just love her as you always have, trust her, support her, let her grow, Jim

[marshlander]

... I plan to just let things develop and be there for her as needed. What else is there to do at this point?

If more parents could do that I'm sure fewer kids would be screwed up.

[sillyboy86]

I think you're a good parents if she shared this very personal thing with you at her difficult age.
Maybe it's only a period, maybe not, as you said 'things happens' and it's not a bad thing in this case. I'm sure you will stay near her and support her decisions.

And for the rest... I agree with the wise Jim and the others.