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What's on Your Mind
I want to leave Earth and never come back
[-] The following 1 member Likes Chase's post:
  • BlueStar
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I have a lot of courage, but not enough to leave this life. There has always been one little pleasure at a time delaying my fatal move.
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(11-30-2020, 10:07 PM)BlueStar Wrote: I have a lot of courage, but not enough to leave this life. There has always been one little pleasure at a time delaying my fatal move.

are you seriously thinking of harming yourself? Do you need someone to talk to?
Bernd

Being gay is not for Sissies.
[-] The following 1 member Likes Bhp91126's post:
  • BlueStar
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@BlueStar I don't think you and I talked much on the forum but I've seen you around since I've been on here. While I don't know your situation and I'm not very poetic, but i understand how you feel. I'm not a professional, I don't know that I have good advice to give...anyone so take anything I say with a big grain of salt.

I once was going to drive my car off the side of a mountain. I was self employed at the time, my life, social life, finances were all crap. I've also more recently thought about hanging myself....that's something I've not shared with anyone. Usually you talk about this stuff and people give you an 800 number to call. I can't explain why I get into the lows and how or why I get out of them, but we are here for you if you need someone to talk to.
"I’m not expecting to grow flowers in a desert, but I can live and breathe and see the sun in wintertime"
Check out my stuff!
[-] The following 1 member Likes InbetweenDreams's post:
  • BlueStar
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Just saw this post! @BlueStar yeah if you ever need to talk - lots of us on the site are here to help or please feel free to drop me a PM! @InbetweenDreams Mike too.
Bighug
Note: No trees were destroyed in the sending of this contaminant free message. However, I do concede, a significant number of electrons may have been inconvenienced.
[-] The following 1 member Likes andy's post:
  • BlueStar
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@Bhp91126
@InbetweenDreams
@andy

I will write a thread about this soon enough.

I permanently think about fatality. Only a few times in my life it has gotten close to seriously happening. But it is a very disturbing feeling to live with.

Thank you for your support, I need it these days...
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(12-01-2020, 09:43 PM)BlueStar Wrote: @Bhp91126
@InbetweenDreams
@andy

I will write a thread about this soon enough.

I permanently think about fatality. Only a few times in my life it has gotten close to seriously happening. But it is a very disturbing feeling to live with.

Thank you for your support, I need it these days...

if serious suicidal thoughts are a recurring issue, you need to get some professional help! 

The sooner the better.

While people on here are happy to give advice, support you and boost your self esteem, this is a far cry from what a professional can do, esp. since GS is all in writing and not real time conversations. If you have a doctor talk to him about it. only a pro can determine what kind of help you need

(besides a straight jacket, 


so you stop chewing your nails,  Big Grin )
Bernd

Being gay is not for Sissies.
[-] The following 1 member Likes Bhp91126's post:
  • BlueStar
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I do not chew my nails x)

I need time and strength to begin a therapy. I got one friend who is often looking out for me. And I need to write down things on a site where people who surround me would not know about it, that is my point.
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(12-01-2020, 11:56 PM)BlueStar Wrote: I do not chew my nails x)

I need time and strength to begin a therapy. I got one friend who is often looking out for me. And I need to write down things on a site where people who surround me would not know about it, that is my point.

writing things down helps to focus on what is important. 

not even your toenails?
Bernd

Being gay is not for Sissies.
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(12-02-2020, 01:45 AM)Bhp91126 Wrote:
(12-01-2020, 11:56 PM)BlueStar Wrote: I do not chew my nails x)

I need time and strength to begin a therapy. I got one friend who is often looking out for me. And I need to write down things on a site where people who surround me would not know about it, that is my point.

writing things down helps to focus on what is important. 

not even your toenails?
No, I would rather chew a chicken bone which I do often when finishing a KFC meal.

That's right, I get to write down or type on my PC a lot of things when I'm nervous. Music, too, helps me escape the world. I need more than that, though. I will get an appointment with my usual therapist when our lockdown ends.
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