Why do I get hit on by middle aged daddies?

[Anonymous]

I'm 18 years old gay guy and I can't understand why I always get attention from men who are old enough to be my fathers. Every time I go to some gay club to meet some new people and just have fun, I'm always approached by some middle aged man who tries to get to know me. I like guys of my own age and I don't mean to insult anyone, but from my point of view, men in their 40ies and 50ies are old. We're completely different generations and I don't think we could have something in common.

Somehow it slowly starts to annoy me. I feel like I'll never be able to find a boyfriend, because guys of my age don't seem to pay any attention to me, older men is what they're looking for. Does it always happen like that - younger guys like older men and the other way round?

[EvenOlderButWiser]

but from my point of view, men in their 40ies and 50ies are old.

Its not just from your point of view, its from ours as well!

Its a bit like being a vampire. If us oldies suck on the blood of a young twinkling stud, we get to be young again. Well at least in our minds

Besides, thats what happens in all those old daddy-son movies, right BA



ObW
X

[TwisttheLeaf]

No. It doesn't always happen like that. Rest assured there's plenty of younger gay men out there interested in men their own age or younger than them.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that you must have a somewhat 'pretty' appearance? It's not always the case, but from experience I can tell you that that -is- what will draw the older who are attracted to young men in the easiest.

Don't get discouraged, man. Take it, instead, as a compliment. BE NICE, above all. Hell, you can tell them that you're not interested but do it nicely. You never know, that guy hitting on you could be a future potential boss so you don't want to go pissing him off or hurting his feelings. (Has personally had this experience.)

[Iceblink]

I feel like I'll never be able to find a boyfriend, because guys of my age don't seem to pay any attention to me, older men is what they're looking for. Does it always happen like that - younger guys like older men and the other way round?

I'm attracted to mature men. I wish I could say it is just because I myself am older, but it has always been that way. When I was your age, I always found a mature, handsome man so much sexier and intriguing than young, boyish types and it is still that way. The funny thing is, when I see men my age going after guys in their 20's, I'm always saying to myself, what could they possibly find attractive about these guys and what could they possibly have in common, despite that I would have been all over many of these older guys when I was younger.

[Uneunsae]

I'm the "pretty" type and tend to attract older men. I do like older men, but only about 10 years older than me, not more. Though I do take it as a compliment and have discovered through talking with said older men is that they are attracted to me because they are not worried about labels anymore. They are secure enough with their sexuality to be with someone feminine like myself.

[matty7]

jump yourself forward 30 years - who u gonna find attractive, hundreds of fit tweens on a dance floor or a 50 year old with a beer gut, comb over, and a a touchy feely hands thing about the same age ??????

that's an extreme example but you get the picture why you get hit on - and u will be that guy sooner than you think, so make the most of now

[HumbleTangerine]

I doubt it's as problematic as you make it seem. Just tell them you're not interested.

Personally, I find the concept of 50 year old men hitting on 18 year olds really creepy, but they're not really doing anything wrong besides embarrassing themselves.

[Bhp91126]

Don't worry, your problems won't last long. The oldies will get wise to your attitude and the next generation of fresh meat already lies in wait...

[artyboy]

lol seems my blood has been stuck a few times lol!

[yourname]

Yeah, I don't get this. When I was --errr---'young', I fucking loved any and all attention I got from anyone, young, old, straight, gay, even male or female. Just because someone "fancies" you (as the Brits say, lol) doesn't mean you have to chow down on their dick....just because someone "fancies" you, doesn't mean you're unattractive to other people or are otherwise hindered/lessened/devalued by those "middle aged men's" attention. It's just absurd. If someone [anyone] "likes" you, then you're probably "attractive"...which is to say you're probably attractive to your target as much as you're deemed attractive by those not your target. So....either your target is just silently admiring your beauty (while us old disgusting geriatrics are just brave enough to say "hey, you're a hottie") or you're so focused on what you say you don't want (us disgusting, rancid, leper-like old fogies) that you're just not seeing those other young hotties go gaga over you.

Either way, I'm not seeing what the real problem is here, except a problem with you and your thinking: first off, as a vile, gross, wrinkled, probably-contagious, and slimy old guy, I gotta say: when I tell a young dude he's bangin', I'm not stupid enough to think I have a chance. And even if I did, I have the wisdom (in spades) to know that what I'm looking for in a mate is stuff he won't have for a decade or so. Secondly, what do you think is going to happen because an old guy recognizes the obvious (you're hot)? What, you're gonna get raped? Do you think that ---like a vampire---he's gonna look into your eyes, msmerize you, and suddenly you're gonna be spread-eagle in a sling with 20 geezers lined up? I mean, do you think so little of yourself that you actually don't think you have the power to say "no thanks" if some (just to repeat: disgusting, yadda, yadda, yadda, blah blah) hits on you? If a someone you think is super-hot sees a bunch of guys --you know, even ugly, disgusting, rancid, etc, etc, geriatrics--fawn over you, do you think he'll think less of you for it? Because I've never seen that happen. From my (considerable....honest) experience, the more cache you have with any group of people, the more cache you have with every group of people.

So love it. Because it isn't gonna last. I mean, it doesn't 'last' for anyone, but especially for whomever actually has the unfortunate honour of "winning" your favour, and then finding out what a shallow, superficial, insecure douche you are. Because it doesn't matter how hot you are, that shit doesn't look good on anyone. :/