My mom is crazy but i love her

[lauj]

My mother is not really crazy but every time she meets one of my guy friends, she asks me all these questions, "does he have a girl?", "is he your friend friend?", "does he do drugs?", "do you like him?" She says this all in front of him but in my native language. My buddy's facial expression are always like "did I do something wrong." Than she reminds me that don't trust anyone outside your family(she's got trust issues because of her past). Than she goes and gives them a bunch of vegetables that she just picked up from her garden. She is like a typical Asian mother. Before we take off to what ever were doing, she walks up to the car and tells me a million times to be safe and don't drink. I love her, she is so loving. Even today, if its cold outside she will yell at me to put on a jacket. She just found out how to text so she'll text me "hi dan you okay Love you bye be safe." Than she'll call me to make sure I'm okay. I've had my friends tell me that I'm lucky to have a mother who cares so much about her sons. She is really supportive but still wants me to marry a girl, any girl. When I was a teenager she always asks me if it was an Asian chick I'm dating. Now she asks if its a girl or boy. I remember the first time I got dumped by this guy and i started to cry. She came over and hugged me, told me its okay, that I shouldn't worry about that and move on. Than asked if i got dumped by a girl or guy lol. I don't live with my mother but she is always over the house. I used to take her frequent visits for granted but now I realized how lucky I'm am. I wonder from time to time if I have grown up because of this. Sorry I just wanted to open myself up more on this forum. Maybe it will help people get a better picture of who I am in real life and whats important to me. Wow I do sound like a mama's boy but when your mom suffered so much in life and put her kids as first priority , the only thing you can do is respect her and try to do what she tells you to do, but I'm still not gonna date a chick for her.

[Cuddly]

Thanks for sharing. Your mum sounds cute. The whole native language infront of your bf is really rude though!!

[50Plus]

Your mom sounds sweet. Especially talking in the native language in front of your boyfriend. Too funny.

Am sure a lot of us do not realize how sweet our mom's really are.

[Drew02]

Typical Asian mother? I would have said typical Portuguese mother, because I have a friend from Portugal with a mom just like yours. No matter what time of day it is, I can't leave her house without eating something that she's made "just for me". I keep telling her that if I liked women, I'd sweep her off her feet.
What impressed me about your post is your attitude of love and acceptance. I know so many people who are embarrassed by their parents and always making excuses for their behavior. Your attitude shows a lot of maturity and self-confidence. And your mom is amazing, you really are one lucky guy!

[Bowyn Aerrow]

So that is where all of my mother's maternal instinct went!

My mother was a slimy, selfish, vicious, malicious, manipulative psychopathic bitch who also practiced witchcraft and not the nice 'white light' craft that wicca an most other pagan people practice, we are talking blood sacrifice, and other horrors. My mother literally was a witch.

Yes you are lucky, very lucky. And her asking all sorts of questions about your male friends is her way of accepting your most likely going to have a husband not a wife. It may be difficult for her to come out and say 'its OK' or to stop harping on the grandchildren aspect of this situation, but I think deep inside, with all of those caring questions she is asking she desires your happiness and hopes/prays you end up with a good person.

Sure, you disappointed her plans. Most parents lay out their offsprings life well before the offspring takes its first breath. The typical formula is Married, children, good career, white picket fence... yada yada yada. When the child decides to depart from this plan it is met with resistance in nearly every case - be it not going to that university or being homosexual.

Parents try to balance out their needs - nay wants - they had for their child and the child's happiness. Seems to me your mother is doing her very best to accept this alternative life that she most likely never even dreamed you would take.

Give her major kudos on acceptance and tolerance to the point she has.

And if she is the full archetype of motherhood, your husband is going to be a lucky fellow as well.

Your mother is not typical Asian Mother, she is typical Motherhood - or what idealized motherhood is all about. I have witnessed a lot of different cultures throw off the same sort of mothering instinct in women.

You're a very, very, very lucky fella.

[TwisttheLeaf]

Your mother sounds amazing. You're very lucky.

[CellarDweller]

crazy mom's can be fun.

Whenever I tell my mom I've met someone, the first words out of her mouth every time are "Is he Italian?"

My mom also had a thing for scaring people. If she heard you coming from somewhere in the house, she'd hide in a room so she could jump out and shout, scaring the shit out of you. LOL

[Will101]

She sounds like a really supportive and loving mother! Haha , if she is not a homophobic mother who tells you to change, or is ashamed of your sexual orientation then I think you are lucky to have her! Did you tell her already? That you only like boys? ( I guess so lol)

[Virge]

OMG luaj!!!!!!!! You just described my guy's mother, grandmother and his aunts!!!!! They're all from the Solomon Islands and speak Ontong when they're all together. I'd dated Jay for over 2 years before I met them at a big family party. From being with him I'd learned all the gay and sex words from him plus enough to understand and say a few things. So when they were yakking in the kitchen I was listening and having a hard time not laughing. That went on for about an hour, listening to them talking about me (not bad stuff) and speculating about who did what to who in the bedroom, if I was rich, if I had brothers who liked girls, was I a real american cowboy, laughing about me having hands as big as boat paddles. So there I was on the patio watching the guys play cricket and I heard one of his aunts say there wasn't enough beer or ice. I answered from the patio, "I will go auntie,".... in their language. There was 30 seconds of total silence from the kitchen then... 20 minutes of giggling. After that they loved me.

I bet your Mom is just like his and 100% concerned just for your happiness. WARNING. When you find the right guy and you mom puts her approval on him... you're going to become 2nd rate to him in her eyes. Jay's Mom and grandmother don't even act like he's in the room when I'm around them. Hahaha! But then... my mother and dad are the same way about him so it evens out.

I bet all your mother wants for you is to see you really happy with someone and it really won't matter if it's a man or woman. When you make it through the stuff you're going through now and get to a place in your life where a strong relationship can happen, she'll be the happiest woman on earth. And don't get jealous if she starts acting like she likes your guy more than you. I'm starting to learn happy parents do that sometimes.

You've made my evening with this. Thanks!

[Adam]

Your mom sounds amazing! She reminds me of my best friend's mother-in-law --- except that this one pretty much ignores her own son in favor of his husband (my friend). The other night we went out, and she called and texted him like 12 times. Not for anything important, just to chat or joke. It may sound like it could be annoying, but it's not. She was babysitting because her son (my friend's husband) was out of town. We got back there really late, but she stayed up to make sure we ate something. You just have to love a mom like that!