Am I really gay?

[Swanny]

I want to be gay, but really do not know If I am. I want to know now whether or not I am truly gay. Anyways, I am noting the fact that I think men can be really attractive and handsome and what not, but I sometimes do not get erected at them unless they have smooth skin and a round ass kind of like a girl. I do not want to be attracted to girls and do not find the idea of heterosexual intimate relationship exciting or stimulating, but instead something to endured for the sake of social acceptance. I am just afraid that liking feminine features in a man makes me less gay? If I like femboys am I gay? If I am sort of like attracted to and in love with a handsome guy, but not necessarily erected at the sight of him naked am I really a gay person? The thought of being in a gay relationship excites me a lot, but I am scared I might not be gay enough or at all. I see myself being in love with and having sex with men, but more or less just enjoying the feeling of their penis inside me as opposed to their whole body. I can appreciate the male form and what not. I am really scared and confused about my sexuality and do not want to be straight or live a heterosexual lifestyle.

[dynamodean]

You make sexual orientation sound like it's a choice. It's not.

Not wanting to be straight won't force the straightness out of someone if they were truly straight anymore than one can "pray the gay away" if they were truly gay. You liking fem boys means that you're gay man who has a preference for fem guys. That's it. Just like there are gays who are into twinks versus bears, top versus bottom, hairy versus smooth, etc, etc.

Embrace your sexuality, don't hide from it.

[Jacqui]

yeah, you're really so gay!

[Swanny]

Are you being sarcastic Jacqui?

[Jacqui]

not at all

[Swanny]

Oh ok just checking

[Adam]

I'm trying to follow the logic, which is always a bad idea at 4am, but anyway...

So...what? I'm attracted to very masculine guys --- does that mean I'm more gay than you?

And...I consider my BF to be hot, but I don't automatically get an erection at the sight of him naked. Depending on the circumstances, I'm just as likely to yell, Get dressed and go feed the baby and let me sleep!

Sexual orientation is not a choice.

[Swanny]

Got it, being gay isn't a choice, but wondering if being attracted to femininity made you any less gay since that is tied to womanliness. I'm talking about males here.

[Cuddly]

Got it, being gay isn't a choice, but wondering if being attracted to femininity made you any less gay since that is tied to womanliness. I'm talking about males here.

Since I'm a man of labels, I am the PERFECT guy to answer this question for you.
Let me stop your worries right now.

If you like dick, you're gay.
If you like pussy, you're straight.
The above assumes you're a guy, the reverse is true if you're a woman.

[East]

Got it, being gay isn't a choice, but wondering if being attracted to femininity made you any less gay since that is tied to womanliness. I'm talking about males here.

What, exactly, is femininity to you? ...and what does that have to do with being gay one way of the other?