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08-01-2014, 11:13 AM

Nothing wrong with being attracted to someone in a non-sexual way...it's being enamored with someone that you typically want to be like yourself if not at least have their influence in your life so they rub off on you. It's partly how we pick our friends. Would also venture to say guys can still have an orgasm together without it being sexual with each other...called watching porn and having a wank with your buds. Goes by many names: hero worship, peer worship, celebrityism...

Had many friends put me in that category of being like a celebrity to them. Really very cute actually. Nothing like watching your buddy mimic your quirks, personality traits, style and almost jizz his pants just being around you.

08-01-2014, 11:54 AM

Ok,

let's break this down.

Polysexual:

the attraction to multiple genders and/or sexes. A polysexual person is one "encompassing or characterized by many different kinds of sexuality."[1] Polysexual is a sexual identity "used by people who recognize that the term bisexual reifies the gender dichotomy that underlies the distinction between heterosexuality and homosexuality, implying that bisexuality is nothing more than a hybrid combination of these gender and sexual dichotomies."......Polysexuality is distinct from polyamory, the desire to be intimately involved with more than one person at once, or pansexuality, which is attraction to all genders and sexes. Polysexuality encompasses many, but not necessarily all, sexualities.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polysexuality

Polyamory:

the practice, desire, or acceptance of having more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved. It is distinct from swinging (which emphasizes sex with others as merely recreational) and may or may not include polysexuality (attraction towards multiple genders and/or sexes)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyamory

Pansexual:

Pansexuality, or omnisexuality,[1] is sexual attraction, sexual desire, romantic love, or emotional attraction toward people of any sex or gender identity.[2][3] Self-identified pansexuals may consider pansexuality a sexual orientation,[3] and refer to themselves as gender-blind, asserting that gender and sex are insignificant or irrelevant in determining whether they will be sexually attracted to others.[4] The Oxford Dictionary of English defines pansexuality as, "not limited or inhibited in sexual choice with regard to gender or activity".[5]

The concept of pansexuality rejects the gender binary, the "notion of two genders and indeed of specific sexual orientations",[3] as pansexual people are open to relationships with people who do not identify as strictly men or women

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pansexuality

Demisexual:

a person who may identify as "grey romantic" or a "grey asexual", respectively, because they may feel romantic attraction or sexual attraction once a reasonably stable or large emotional connection has been created

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demisexuali...ationships

If you really want to get a really good grasp on all this, immerse yourself in studying human sexuality, sexual orientation, gender identity and asexuality. Aside from wikipedia, there is a boat load of information out there.

Ultimately what it all means for me anyway, is that your label should not define you as a person, should not dictate who you are or how you live your life or what choices you make but should merely reflect the desires of your heart.

08-01-2014, 11:57 AM

memechose Wrote:You asked about pansexualism and I was hoping someone else would jump in and do a good job of explaining it and save me from having to do it ---- because I don't think anyone in GS has been spared my rants about labels. I hate them. I hate them even more when they're stuck on me... by the jerk I'm going to end up marrying.

Pansexual fits me pretty well. I'm attracted to both sexes pretty much equally when you do it on paper with pluses and minuses. The big thing for me is that unless there is some sort of chemistry between me and a guy --- or a woman it's not even arousing for me. Without some sort of connection or chemistry it's all just meaningless to me.

And to screw up the whole pansexual definition I attach much higher value on that chemistry than on the gender of the partner. I happened to find it with a guy and I'm focused on him and him alone. From my understanding most people who are pansexual have a more difficult time in focusing on being monogamous. I don't. I can cut up about hot guys in a gay forum and women in a forum of predominantly straight guys (if I was in one) .... but it's all just me cutting up -- being funny. If I started a thread about the things that REALLY attract me to the guy I'm with you guys would beat me to death with a trophy for being the most boring and mushy pervert ever allowed in GS.

I know there's a deep psychological thingie about my sexuality and my friendships --- which are deep down to the marrow of the bone with men, gay straight or whatever.... but never much deeper than birdbaths with most women. I bond in a brotherly way with men a hundred times easier than with women regardless of the prospects of sex with either of them.

The freudian explanation would be my deep dark need to keep the brotherly love I had with my own big brother whose approval means more to me at age 26 than my parents.... and my parents give approval all the time. I have to EARN it from my brother and the guys who are my circle of friends.

Let me give you an example of how this works. If my parents ever found out I cheated on Jay they'd pour a lot of coffee and give me a long talk about relationships. If my brother found out --- or any of my straight guy friends found out --- all of them would walk off and throw their hands up and treat me like crap.

I could do another 10 paragraphs and explain this. I doubt you'd read it. Not a day goes by that I dont weigh the weight of my "brothers" against my heart. And not a day passes without a brother standing up to defend my heart. It's something that's incomprehensible in the gay world.

^well said, love this post.

08-01-2014, 03:50 PM

memechose Wrote:You asked about pansexualism and I was hoping someone else would jump in and do a good job of explaining it and save me from having to do it ---- because I don't think anyone in GS has been spared my rants about labels. I hate them. I hate them even more when they're stuck on me... by the jerk I'm going to end up marrying.

Pansexual fits me pretty well. I'm attracted to both sexes pretty much equally when you do it on paper with pluses and minuses. The big thing for me is that unless there is some sort of chemistry between me and a guy --- or a woman it's not even arousing for me. Without some sort of connection or chemistry it's all just meaningless to me.

And to screw up the whole pansexual definition I attach much higher value on that chemistry than on the gender of the partner. I happened to find it with a guy and I'm focused on him and him alone. From my understanding most people who are pansexual have a more difficult time in focusing on being monogamous. I don't. I can cut up about hot guys in a gay forum and women in a forum of predominantly straight guys (if I was in one) .... but it's all just me cutting up -- being funny. If I started a thread about the things that REALLY attract me to the guy I'm with you guys would beat me to death with a trophy for being the most boring and mushy pervert ever allowed in GS.

I know there's a deep psychological thingie about my sexuality and my friendships --- which are deep down to the marrow of the bone with men, gay straight or whatever.... but never much deeper than birdbaths with most women. I bond in a brotherly way with men a hundred times easier than with women regardless of the prospects of sex with either of them.

The freudian explanation would be my deep dark need to keep the brotherly love I had with my own big brother whose approval means more to me at age 26 than my parents.... and my parents give approval all the time. I have to EARN it from my brother and the guys who are my circle of friends.

Let me give you an example of how this works. If my parents ever found out I cheated on Jay they'd pour a lot of coffee and give me a long talk about relationships. If my brother found out --- or any of my straight guy friends found out --- all of them would walk off and throw their hands up and treat me like crap.

I could do another 10 paragraphs and explain this. I doubt you'd read it. Not a day goes by that I dont weigh the weight of my "brothers" against my heart. And not a day passes without a brother standing up to defend my heart. It's something that's incomprehensible in the gay world.

Why do you feel that this is incomprehensible in the gay world?

ChadCoxRox · 08-01-2014, 05:19 PM

memechose Wrote:Not a day goes by that I dont weigh the weight of my "brothers" against my heart. And not a day passes without a brother standing up to defend my heart. It's something that's incomprehensible in the gay world.

OK I'll bite. WTF? Wavey