Rejecting a guy

[Anonymous]

So my question would be - how to reject someone who likes you?

There's this guy who gives me a lot of attention, treats me as if we were lovers and he even has said he would like to be my boyfriend. However I don't need his attention and would appreciate a lot if he stopped doing this. I'm the kind of person who doesn't need anyone to be happy. I love being single and don't want to mess with relationship. It might sound egoistic, but it's just who I am.

There have been a lot of guys who wanted the same thing this guy wants, but somehow I managed to get rid of them, they understood I don't want a boyfriend. This one, unfortunately, doesn't want to give up. He believes I'm just playing hard to get and returns to me all the time. I've told him a lot of times to find someone else and forget about me. He says he likes me and no one else. For me it's a little bit stupid.

Actually he's a nice guy and I don't want to hurt him, but I want him to understand that he's just wasting his time with me, I'll never answer him the way he wants. Maybe my question should me - how to reject him in a way he understands?

[gerald]

hi, I love you, do you want to marry me

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Um No.

Since you desire to enforce your independence in life, then it is only fair to allow you all of the independence you can want. That means you need to figure this one out on your own.

Besides which, I can see at least 4 important life lessons this experience will teach you if I allow you to muddle through on your own. And I suspect that this experience will, eventually turn around and present you with a few more life lessons once your feelings and needs change.

I do wish you luck on this, Mr. Anonymous. Me thinks you are going to need a lot of luck.

Cheers

[50Plus]

WTF? I thought you had a boyfriend whose parents wouldn't let you be together?

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Anyone with 50 posts or more can use the Anonymous Poster account to post in most forums. This could be any member posting. In theory its to give people the way to post without being linked back to them.

[17vs41]

So my question would be - how to reject someone who likes you?

There's this guy who gives me a lot of attention, treats me as if we were lovers and he even has said he would like to be my boyfriend. However I don't need his attention and would appreciate a lot if he stopped doing this. I'm the kind of person who doesn't need anyone to be happy. I love being single and don't want to mess with relationship. It might sound egoistic, but it's just who I am.

There have been a lot of guys who wanted the same thing this guy wants, but somehow I managed to get rid of them, they understood I don't want a boyfriend. This one, unfortunately, doesn't want to give up. He believes I'm just playing hard to get and returns to me all the time. I've told him a lot of times to find someone else and forget about me. He says he likes me and no one else. For me it's a little bit stupid.

Actually he's a nice guy and I don't want to hurt him, but I want him to understand that he's just wasting his time with me, I'll never answer him the way he wants. Maybe my question should me - how to reject him in a way he understands?

Tell him you are dieing! (you pick the illness or disease)

[Virge]

I saw this question yesterday and didn't answer immediately because I needed to think it over and recall the times I've been in similar situations.

I'll bet money I'm going to be right about this guy because guys who do this all have about the same game plan... from my own experiences.

First, just go ahead and accept the fact there's no way you can get out of this looking like the good guy. Just accept it and don't let things turn into a struggle for "being right" about it. Concentrate on "doing right."

The right thing to do is level with him in a firm way without anger or confrontation. Tell him it's a "you thing" and not about him.

He might take it well and be civil about it. My money's on him doing it the way all the ones I've experienced have done it. I bet he'll say something like....

"I don't know how you got the idea I was interested in you in any way besides being friends."
Or
"Don't flatter yourself. I was just being nice to you because you seem so lonely."

If that happens, let it go and walk away. DO NOT let it go into a debate about his hidden agenda with you. You can't win it and you don't get a trophy for "being right" about this or anything in life.

And if that happens as I'm predicting you can't even save a friendship without him putting you through the same drama so don't try. You might as well get ready for him to start start smack about you for being a jerk who thought he was hot for you. Just accept it and let it go. You can't ever win with people like that playing their game.

And try not to lose a wink of sleep over it.

[Cuddly]

Tell him he's cute and that you wish him all the best, but you two will not become an item, because you aren't going to settle down.

[Uneunsae]

^ I would advise against this because either he will convince you to settle down, or pretend that he doesn't want to settle down and that he just wants to "have fun" together.

Blatant honesty is the only way to deal with this without digging yourself into a hole. You can't give him anything to hang onto.

[Jacqui]

just say " I don't like you, really sorry."