Yup, gay people can be awful to one another, perhaps because the only people they can feel superior to are other gay people.
For example, I knew this guy who had an inferiority complex; he made up for his lack of looks by bragging about his sex life and making hints at how good he was at being gay. He hated me because I turned down his every attempt to have sex with me, so he was really passive-aggressive toward me about not knowing how to be gay enough to have the experience that he had. He always disgusted me, always talking about inappropriate things like anal sex and making everyone in the room uncomfortable... as if anyone wanted to visualize him being stuffed in the ass.
Anyway, enough of that, you get the idea. Gay guys can be nasty sometimes, but my theory is that the mean ones feel inferior/threatened in one way or another.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
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^the even more disturbing aspects there are the concepts of "being gay" and "gay enough."
What would that even mean?
The equivalent of the insecure straight man's macho, hypermasculinity?
Had a woman tell me once she couldn't handle it if her husband was bi because she would be afraid he would be more concerned about pleasuring his prostate through anal than pleasuring her vag with his peen.
She considered herself straight but engaged in same sex activity with other women frequently.
Delusional people can be selfish, judgmental, despicable hypocrites at times
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I experienced the same odd behavior a number of years ago when I was still out and about in the gay community. My disillusion with the evil nature of so many gay brothers and sisters forced me to "go my own way" and develop interests that were outside where mostly gay people met/associated/organized. Believe it or not....even though most people consider me effeminate, it was much easier to find likeable people who were no more interested in bashing a lifestyle, creating dilemma for people of "alternate choice", or otherwise cause discomfort for others than it was within the gay community. I didn't have to deal with equally effeminate guys calling me a queen, putting up with bigoted comments from people with no more sense than a gnat, or listen to endless ridicule of others who didn't fit into the mold that the "popular" gays mandate. Although I've gotten my doctorate in Psychology, I still find it difficult to understand why the phenomenon you've described occurs. Yes, there are volumes written on theories of why it occurs, but I deal with logic....and it isn't logical to hear others who are (supposedly) in the "same boat" (being LGBT) bash each other so mercilessly.
My humble advice....find outlets that promote positivity in your life. Check out other YouTube offerings. Associate with people who value diversity and keep the nastiness to themselves. Most importantly....be your own person....one who makes a positive mark on the LGBT community. We all need more folks like that.
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I have experience with scenario #1 and #2..... and have witnessed #3.
Aside from the bisexuality thing, you'd also be amazed at how many give flack to gay Asian men and other men who like Asian men. And, of course, those who assume every gay Asian man is a bottom or a submissive or a twink.
That said? I have no idea why this happens. It's.... just not one of those things that's easy for me to wrap my mind around.
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I think the key factor is that people who are gay are still -people- It's the human condition and humans tend to fear/ridicule/dislike what they don't understand or those who are different than themselves.
You would -think-(or we'd all like to think) that being gay and being in that minority makes people more open minded and accepting, but it doesn't always work that way, yeah?
Though on the upside, the people here have proven themselves to be open minded and accepting, understanding and helpful. Gay, Bisexual or straight, this place, these people seem to promote that acceptance and that...is -awesome-
You guys rock....
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Capricorn
