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if I'm capable of finding love, let alone feeling it. If I haven't ever felt what it's like to love someone and be loved back by now, will I ever? I'll admit that I'm young-ish, but it's starting to get to the point where I feel like something might be inherently wrong with me, I'm the last one left in my group of friends who has never been loved by someone, gay or straight. Sounds pathetic I know, it's just that I'm worried that I won't get to experience being with someone ever.
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What are you doing to find someone?
Are you going out and meeting people?
Are you standards too high?
Are you sitting at home hoping/waiting for them to come find you?
Are you using apps and trying to order a guy on line like a pizza?
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I'm a : Single Gay Man
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As long as you keep all spaces open, like those Borg pointed out, your chances of finding your love will be higher. You should neither rush nor sit down doing nothing with your life. Catch any occasion along the way, but you absolutely have to be patient.
Just like what I did, I've waited years for who I needed the most, and here he is. Yet all of it was too sudden and unexpected, however I decided to seize the opportunity, to sneak around the correct places and websites. Yes you WILL love and be loved, but only if you desire it and start acting to get it. Never give up!
Like I always say, you can't force love, you can't fight it, all you have to do is to embrace it when it comes knocking at your door. Most important of all, love yourself without egoism. I'm sure then you'll get to define love by yourself when you get what you've always looked for, not by words, not by vision, but feelings alone...
Whoever, my heart is with you. And you can realize from my threads to what degree my boyfriend turned my entire life from hell to paradise, yet how sudden was his entrance into it. Which means, have hope always, someone somewhere is falling in love with your smile.
But you have to be patient, a new day will shine upon your path...
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Borg69 Wrote:What are you doing to find someone?
Are you going out and meeting people?
Are you standards too high?
Are you sitting at home hoping/waiting for them to come find you?
Are you using apps and trying to order a guy on line like a pizza?
I've already heard it all... I go out and make friends, my standards are pretty normal, some would say even low, and apps creep me out.
I hate that I can't express that I have this problem without being automatically judged, it just happens to be that for whatever reason I haven't been with anyone yet. Why that is beats me, hence why I felt the need to vent.
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I'm not 100% clear on what your problem is. Never been in love or never had a relationship?
Do you have crushes on other guys? Do you try to develop those? Have you been in love with someone, but he didn't love you back?
Do you have a sexlife or is it all masturbation?
Bernd
Being gay is not for Sissies.
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Bhp91126 Wrote:I'm not 100% clear on what your problem is. Never been in love or never had a relationship?
Do you have crushes on other guys? Do you try to develop those? Have you been in love with someone, but he didn't love you back?
Do you have a sexlife or is it all masturbation?
Well, at least I do have a sex life, but that's all it is, just sex. And of course I've had crushes on guys, very intense ones that have never been returned, but I have a problem that seems to be a recurring thing with a lot of gay guys: the guys I like are either straight, taken or not interested because they have their eyes on someone better, or they're just not emotionally available. .
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Anonymous Wrote:Well, at least I do have a sex life, but that's all it is, just sex. And of course I've had crushes on guys, very intense ones that have never been returned, but I have a problem that seems to be a recurring thing with a lot of gay guys: the guys I like are either straight, taken or not interested because they have their eyes on someone better, or they're just not emotionally available. .
Maybe this is your problem... you're giving up the goods too soon. You're also consciously, or subconsciously picking/settling on guys whom are unobtainable.
You need to work on your weeding out processes and stop wasting time on guys who aren't ever going to work out long term.
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Anonymous Wrote:Well, at least I do have a sex life, but that's all it is, just sex. And of course I've had crushes on guys, very intense ones that have never been returned, but I have a problem that seems to be a recurring thing with a lot of gay guys: the guys I like are either straight, taken or not interested because they have their eyes on someone better, or they're just not emotionally available. . Welcome to dating. You will find lots of guys that are straight, taken or not interested. However, you seem to have low self confidence, if you think guys are interested in someone better. Self confidence is very attractive, so you should cultivate it. Nothing is more repelling than someone desperate.
Bernd
Being gay is not for Sissies.
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Cliche-ness aside, things like this happen when you least expect it. Everybody is different. Some start dating when they're 13. Others when they're 24. It just depends on so many factors and life will make everything fall into place when it's meant to happen. I was like you. I wanted something. And as soon as I caught the opportunity, I finally caught it! Everything seemed so great in the beginning. But after a week, I noticed, he wasn't my guy. I only did it out of desperation. Luckily, he felt the same way when I told him we couldn't date, so it wasn't that bad. But as bad as it may seem, don't rush it! If not, you'll get yourself in a "beggars can't be choosers" situation. I'm still young myself and I've only been in one relationship, and that lasted about only 3 months. So I still have a lot to learn. But one thing I do know about all this lovey dovey stuff, is that almost always, it's no good to rush. Keep doing what you're doing, and put yourself out there and out of your comfort zone, here and there, and I guarantee you, in time, that guy will come to you and you won't even notice it.
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Well Wardo, I hope you're right. Granted I'm a little older than you, I'm about to finish college after coming here four years ago with such ambition and hope, I had a second chance to have what I never got to have throughout high school. And now here I am, writing this post... I came out two years ago and all guys ever want from me is sex. Maybe some guy does want me in a less shallow way, but I haven't had the luck of meeting him yet. I remember when all my friends started dating when I was around 14, I always thought that I would soon follow. I never would have thought I would still be waiting to have just one special experience after eight years, that right now I would still be waiting to feel what it's like to have my feelings for someone returned.
Sorry, I know I'm going on and on, but it's been a rough day and this is really getting to me right now.
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