HIV Concern or Just Anxiety?

[Bowyn Aerrow]

My last relationship of 14 years was a mixed status relationship. Him Pos, me Neg.....

I came to find out a lot about just how much HIV can affect a relationship. There is more than just the physical aspects to consider... Its not just about managing the sex part, the day to day side effects of having a third partner in the relationship is a problem which most people don't realize until they walk that road. Cost of drugs, putting a band aide/plaster on a minor cut of his... awake in the middle of the night wondering about what happens if he becomes tolerate to all the cocktails... There is a lot of hidden stuff that most folk don't seem to talk about.

IF you do pursue this relationship, or any relationship with a positive person, I strongly suggest you start reading up on the emotional impacts that mixed status can have. And learn how to cope with the potentials and other emotional stuff that HIV presents.

[Cejai]

Today if a person has HIV and are on meds with undetectable status infecting anyone is almost impossible. But that doesn't go for other stds

[Virge]

Here's you a song to go with your thread

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Today if a person has HIV and are on meds with undetectable status infecting anyone is almost impossible. But that doesn't go for other stds

While people know this intellectually, most do not understanding emotionally.

One of the common fears of mixed status partners is that the positive one fears infecting their partner no matter how low their viral load or how many condoms they wear.

Its and emotional thing.

[Cejai]

I agree with you. My partner and I just recently split unfortunately after 4 years he is neg I am positive and undetectable. We have never used condoms he's allergic. However, after all that time I have kept him neg. I'm not saying go and do it because you must be undetectable and stay that way that means keeping up with your meds and never cheat. But you also have to watch out that your partner is faithful because he can still give you other things that will certainly mess with your system. Always be careful cheating partners lie.

[Chimpy]

Don't worry too much!

I had a similar experience last year. I invited a guy around to my place after we'd met a few times. It was the first guy I'd been with for years. We ended up having a cuddle in bed, kissing, and I sucked his uncut cock for only about 20 secs (he was quite large and made me gag). He didn't cum.

I never met him again but about a week later I felt really ill and it lasted for weeks. My gums also started bleeding a little while after as well. I was sure I had HIV but then I read the chances of catching it from oral are tiny, and even less if the guy doesn't cum in your mouth. Anyway I went to the dentist and apparently I'd picked up a gum infection. That eventually cleared up. I assume I caught it from kissing him. The general illness sorted itself out eventually as well. This was over a year ago and I've not been with anyone since.

I think being intimate with another person exposes you to all sorts of common everyday germs that you're body isn't familiar with. I think kissing opens you up to loads of nasties.

Long and short of it - you've probably just picked up some common viruses and bacteria from him.