Made a new friend

[Radbot42]

via OKcupid. I made it clear that I was only looking to make friends. I'm working on getting my life together before I start another relationship. He accepted this and we hung out a few times. After the third time we hung out and when I went to leave he went in for a kiss.

I stopped him and said No. He asked are you sure, and I said No again. I felt very awkward after this and texted him when I got home that I was flattered but am only looking to make friends. He apologized and said he should have respected what I said earlier. I then told him that we can put this behind us and still be friends, but I know it might be awkward knowing that he likes me.

[WolfEyes300]

Awwwww, Well at least ye will know that there IS someone there... But, there will be a time limit... He won't be single forever...
Is it alright to ask, What it is that ye need to sort out in yer life, to be able to start dating again?
Hi Btw... I'm Wolfy, Or Pup...

[Radbot42]

Hey Wolfy, I need to get my life together. I need to get a job and move out of my parent's basement. I'm also nor entirely over my first ex. I want to be fulfilled with being on my own before I start trying to find that special someone.

[Rojo1990]

If you guys were enjoying each others company etc it shouldn't be awkward staying as friends. In fact the next time you meet up, after a little while, you'll probably forget it had happened.

He may of been into you but you told him you were only looking for friends. So he will know for sure now not to make another move or anything. Well I can't really speak for him, but I don't think he would make another move, unless you gave him a reason to. Which you haven't.

[princealbertofb]

It's not awkward, Radbot, it's just one of those things that happen. I hope he values you as a friend too. He knows what you wanted and since things were clear, there shouldn't be any awkwardness. If you do find it awkward, come out with it, just tell him there may have been a misunderstanding. I'm sure you can also understand why he wanted to kiss you. Isn't it nice to know that someone cares enough for you to give themselves to you? Maybe it is too early, just make sure he understands that you're not completely healed from your previous relationship.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Every time I have gone to make a friend I only end up with sewed together body parts... IDK no matter how much electricity I hit the body with it just doesn't come alive. I'm quite certain I'm following Dr. Frankenstein's methodology to the letter.


Its nice you want to make 'just friends' and you realize your life has issues to iron out and 'stuff'. But let me tell you how love works, its modus operandi.

Typically when a person is looking for love, wanting it to happen, hoping and praying and slowly sinking into a state of desperation, love cannot be found. Love shuns them, makes them beg even more, drives them to making pacts with the devil for a wee bit of attention. Love is cruel.

It is when you are least prepared for it, with your plate already full of other stuff you just have to do, that love walks up silently behind you and then proceeds to bash your brains in with a blunt object. Yeah love hurts in many ways.

So don't be too quick to shove this guy to the side. Yeah sure you think you want to get your life in order first and hold off a bit, you think you want just a friend - but life tends to throw at you the things you need more often than the things you want. Humans want much, but need little, and often enough humans wants do not match their needs, thus they don't get what they want when they want it.

Including when they want to do things slow, or work by a set of goals, plan.

Never know, you may need to have a lover in your life more than you need a friend.

[LJay]

Kisses are nice. They don't have to be commitments or considered as foreplay.

[emil]

The way you talk or treat him during the meet could have been the reason he likes you. He might just forgot about the earlier idea of being friend or stuff like that. Remind him again and start going out as usual and just keep the gap between in it. Jmo

[Steve]

Don't let a possible good friendship go because of a misunderstanding.

People always grouch that love is hard to find, but I think a good solid friendship where someone accepts you, warts and all, and still wants to spend time with you may be just as difficult to find. Hang out with him again. If it feels like the two of you aren't going to get past the awkwardness of that one moment I suppose you'll have to let that friendship go. It just seems silly to me to make more of something than it is... You've talked about it, both resolved the issue and now all that's left is to continue to build the friendship. If he isn't being honest about not wanting your friendship to turn into something deeper that's on him. You can put a stop to a friendship whenever you feel uncomfortable.

[Radbot42]

We have stayed friends and hung out a few more time since I posted this. I definitely overreacted. I've never been in this situation before, but we have moevd on.