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How to discipline kids
#1
I know this sounds corny but there's only one way to do it: LOVE.

Threats and punishments do not work, believe me; love does.

Love means establishing a connection, reaching out to others and that's exactly what a high school teacher has to do. Empathy is another word for it.

This year, I have the wildest group of teenage kids you can possibly imagine and so far I've had zero discipline problems. I don't even have to raise my voice anymore.

My colleagues, by the contrary, have had terrible experiences and one of them was even physically attacked by one of the students (he threw a table at her). Things have gotten so bad, the school director had to intervene and now we have an emergency meeting scheduled for this week.

I'm always looking for ideas for classroom activities (ages 16-19), any tips are more than welcome.
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#2
I'm neither a parent nor a teacher, but another thing I believe matters is learning that actions have consequences -- whether good or bad. An activity that reinforced that would probably be useful. Sorry, I don't have specific ideas. Also, I think there are games that encourage cooperation rather than competition, which is somewhat related.
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#3
Elijoan Wrote:I'm neither a parent nor a teacher, but another thing I believe matters is learning that actions have consequences -- whether good or bad. An activity that reinforced that would probably be useful. Sorry, I don't have specific ideas. Also, I think there are games that encourage cooperation rather than competition, which is somewhat related.

Absolutely.

I'm all for cooperation but competition isn't that bad either. Kids are extremely competitive and we can use that to motivate them.
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#4
My friend used to teach troubled teens and one of the things she did (with MUCH SUCCESS) every year was to get them to become part of something bigger than they were.....

She had them become part of a yearly event in San Jose where they had to work together as a group and raise money for charity and give back to the community....they did a great job year after year....

It gave them a sense of responsibility and purpose...a lot of them came from homes with little structure or discipline ....
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#5
My grandmother was a geniouse when it came to punishments and ill follow her example! Big Grin
punish each child uniquely.
IE my uncle rick hated being alone so my grandma would give him time outs in his room
uncle billy hated being around people so Grandma would make him stay in the living room with no book while company was over.
My parents didnt get how hard headed I was, dad would whip me until mom would intervene, but it didnt do any good. My grandma knew my weakness.. she would make me feel bad,, like sad. She would act really hurt if I did something wrong and I would feel terrible for making her sad for days.
she is a very smart lady Big Grin she knew when to give and when to not give. Ill follow her example and give my kids If I ever have any, a punishment that suits them uniquely.
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#6
I'm not a Parent and can't say how I would discipline my kids if I ever had them, but I know it would never have to do with physically hitting them.
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#7
Love? We do love our kids, at least I do and although I don't treat them I do punish them if they're doing wrong. If the kids aren't yours I can understand that you want to use another method than threat and punishment, because trust, me if you'd had me as a student and you'd treat and punish me, the only thing you would have done is to make me enrage and boil my blood with revenge and resentment that will not fade away until I act upon it. But as a parent, love and turn the other cheek doesn't work sorry.

I told my son that I didn't want him to sag his pants, and I explained in clear voice why I didn't want him to do that as I find this fashion to stand for nothing else than showing your ass and underwear. He didn't listen and I caught him with his pants half way to his tights. Well, because I do love him, and because I do want him to understand what I meant. I got out of the car, called my son over, forced him to take off his pants, put back his socks and shoes, Had him remove his shirt and in front of a crew of over 60 people, young, older, girls, boys I had him walk 10 minutes back and forth in its underwear. Yes it was humiliating, yes he cried and NO he'll never sag again. Sometimes to get your point across a good and creative punishment is necessary. And I'm very good at it.
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#8
SilverBullet Wrote:My grandmother was a geniouse when it came to punishments and ill follow her example! Big Grin
[...]

Wow she sounds like a fascinating woman, a very strong personality indeed!

I'm not saying that punishment is useless, it is important but only as a last resort.

When you're dealing with kids as tough as these, empathy is your #1 weapon.

Classes went really well this week, I feel so proud when I see all those kids in complete silence and focused on their work! Smile Smile Smile Let's see what this week brings, hopefully it will be a good one.
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#9
Some activities I tried this week:

a) Funny YouTube videos (the subject was archives, so it was a good excuse to talk about YouTube and show some funny videos and they loved them)

b) Collective writing

c) Music archive

d) Android tablets instead of conventional pen and paper

Any other tips? I really need them, guys!
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#10
Punishment is a hard thing to do now a days. I was spanked when I was kid. Not a lot because it hurt and I didn't want to get spanked again. Now a days, spanking is frowned upon, though for generations, punishment like this was handed down by parents. Not saying that it should be the go to punishment because there are plenty of other punishment but it is very effective when administered properly as a kid. It gets the point across of acceptable and unacceptable behavior quickly.

Now as a teenager, spanking is not really an option. This is when you have to get creative and know how to cause the greatest amount of strife for your kids with the least amount of effort. Grounding them, taking away technology are good ones. As a teacher, you should never embarrass your students especially in front of other students. As a parent, you can embarrass your kids, it sort of a requirement. Embarrassing punishments work well.

The problem now a days is that parents aren't so much punishing their kids anymore for unacceptable behavior. They blame it on everything else, the teacher, a disorder, another kid, or sugar. They do not take responsibility for the actions of their kid. So the kid learns that they can do anything the want and not get punished because he can blame it on some one else. And parents allow them to do it. They forget to instill in them actions have consequences. So when they mess up in school, they don't realize the consequences of their actions until its to late.
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