Steve Wrote:Another method of atonement, help someone who genuinely needs assistance. There are no shortage people who have fallen on hard times or are in dire circumstance due to actions beyond their control. If the guilt of this one lapse in judgement is leaving you without peace of mind, be a helping hand to someone who really needs it.
I like this idea. Chances are he fixed his ride, and a financial windfall at this point would not be likely to trigger any change in his behavior.
I'm not generally a vengeful person... I'm more likely to just disappear from your life without a trace, without even giving you the opportunity to explain yourself. I'm not sure that's much healthier, but it's how I roll.
One incident that comes to mind... I dated Guy A briefly and we remained casual friends, although continued to harbor a soft spot for him for a long time. He is the kind of guy you are not super proud of dating, but manages to get under your skin. Also probably the best kisser I have ever encountered, and I admit that even though there was nothing else going on between us, we'd still end up making out when we got together just because he was so freaking good at it.
Guy B, someone whom we both knew but whom I had not hung out with in a long time, made a point of contacting me to tell me, he and Guy A were now dating. My response to him was pretty much "That's nice" even though he violated #14 of the "Gay Code" rules I hold as gospel (if you're not familiar with Nate Lippens' "
Advice for New Arrivals" AKA "You Are Not a Strong Black Woman", it's worth a read). But it continued to stew at me, and one night when I happened to be near his home, I decided I was going to go tell him about himself. He lived in a big condo complex and it was raining and I'm sure I was a sight by the time he opened the door to see me for the first time in years, dripping wet. It was very
The Thorn Birds, or at least it was in my head.
Before he could say anything, I pointed at him and said, "I just want to tell you one thing: No matter what happens, just remember,
you... get... him... used."
I could tell you that I left him there, slack-jawed, and disappeared into the night, but in fact he called me a bitch, we got drunk together on his floor and I told him I was not really upset; it was just too good of a line to waste. He agreed and I still tease him about it now and again.
Meanwhile Guy A later claimed they never dated, but at this point we're all old, so who cares? We don't hang out anymore mostly because I gotta avoid near occasions of making out with him.