Worst "sex" horror stories

[East]

Hopefully, sharing the experience will now help you heal....but I would definitely seek counselling....because I think the thing that is plaguing you the most isn't that you had sex while drugged...it is that someone removed your control over your own actions and raped you. Only a therapist with some real face time can help you make sense of this and sort out your troubled feelings.

I think you are right. I do need to talk to someone about it....

I left out the part where it wakes me up at night sometimes thinking about it...that is not a good sign....

My therapist passed away so finding another one may be a job....I think maybe someone who understands the subject might be a good fit...

[East]

I thought about getting professional help as I DO think it is a good idea but there is one major drawback....

I had sex with too many men...and I am not sorry about it. There is no way I will not be judged on that bit of information and even the nicest therapist is gonna see it as something I did wrong or asked for...probably try to treat my sexual appetite as my "real problem"....it isn't...

...and I have thought about it for so long now I know one thing for sure.. I didn't ask for that. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time...but people have gotten a lot more prudish about sex since the 60s and 70s and I think then I might have had a better chance of finding a therapist who could help me versus finding one today in this atmosphere...

So...instead...I found a forum that helps men who have had similar experiences....and it looks like a great place. I will feel it out and maybe I can get some permanent resolution....

Wish me luck....

[dynamodean]

I hope you will find ways to heal, East. Those are horrible things that happened to you and I realize how I recently may have dodged something similar with my blind date. My radar went off the charts and I would have soon left if he hadn't.

[Hardheaded1]

East, I'm glad you are addressing the problem. Ultimately, that is all any of us can do, is begin to seek help.

Dissociation following trauma is a studied phenomenon, not rare, not psychic, nor metaphysical. Here is a link to an introduction to it: http://www.isst-d.org/?contentID=76

As for dreading some moral judgment from a counselor, I think you are creating anxiety over that when it is unlikely to occur. You've long since owned your sexual appetite and experiences. When narrating your life, I don't think a trained counselor is likely to dwell on that.

Good luck with the therapy.

As for Misterlove's demonic claw on the ass, the jury is still out on that one. The Devil gets his due.

[East]

I just saw this...GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR..............

I wonder just how bad this problem is for men? I think maybe worse than anyone knows...especially when you don't even know what happened.....

I am so f*cking mad right now after reading this.......

New Zealand Hostel Owner Filmed Sexual Assault Of At Least 16 Backpackers: Police

The owner of a New Zealand hostel is accused of drugging at least 16 male backpackers, then making videos while he sexually assaulted them.

Authorities say Michael Harris, 56, allegedly carried out the disturbing acts over a period of 30 months at the Mainstreet Lodge in Kaitaia. The victims are reportedly mostly 18 to 25-year-old overseas travelers.

Cops said images they have recovered depict Harris sexually abusing the young men, according to Sky News. Police want to talk to anyone who has stayed at the hostel over the past few years.

TVNZ reports that police have already received calls and emails from around the world in connection with the case.

"These victims are unlikely to know that something has happened to them, although they may have suspicions,” Detective Senior Sergeant Rhys Johnson said in a statement Wednesday. “We will deal sensitively with them and offer all appropriate support required.”

Harris was indicted Wednesday on 39 charges, including aggravated wounding, making of intimate visual recordings, possession of intimate visual recordings and indecent assault.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/09/11...ps=gravity

[MisterLove]

East, I'm glad you are addressing the problem. Ultimately, that is all any of us can do, is begin to seek help.

Dissociation following trauma is a studied phenomenon, not rare, not psychic, nor metaphysical. Here is a link to an introduction to it: http://www.isst-d.org/?contentID=76

As for dreading some moral judgment from a counselor, I think you are creating anxiety over that when it is unlikely to occur. You've long since owned your sexual appetite and experiences. When narrating your life, I don't think a trained counselor is likely to dwell on that.

Good luck with the therapy.

As for Misterlove's demonic claw on the ass, the jury is still out on that one. The Devil gets his due.

Speaking of which, I have another one. Not horrific but a bit strange.

This happened twice. I go to a famous sex club, get completely drunk and this weirdo bangs me like crazy. The guy had no hair whatsoever and tattoos all over his body. I didn't recognise the symbols but now I know at least some of them were clearly satanic.

It seems everytime I got drunk, he was out to get me. loooll

[JackTX]

It's kind of stunning how frequently this stuff happens.

When I was 13, a friend of my older brother's plied me with alcohol and showed me porn to get me horny and then more or less coerced me into letting him blow me. It's very complicated in my head because I remember thinking I was gay by that point, and when he was asking if I wanted to drink and watch porn being almost... hopeful? that something would happen. But I felt a little traumatized afterward. I just thought something... wrong/weird had happened. So I have a hard time figuring out what to call this thing... molestation?... first gay experience?... hot older-bro-friend action? (lol). I mean he clearly used alcohol and I was a significantly younger kid. A few more years and it may have been remembered fondly as a freebie blowjob from heaven :p

I didn't live super close to this guy so I never saw him again... until one time when I was about 22... *dun*dun*dun*

I was at a gay bar having some beer and playing pool with friends and I looked up. And there he was! It was like time slowed down...

I think he tried to acknowlege me but I pretty much snubbed him hard. You already had me. Go away :p I just don't know what kind of conversation I could have had with him anyway.

I don't dwell on this incident but I guess I can do a "me too" here. It seems like so many people have had shit like this happen. I think my sister had one of my mom's boyfriend's try to touch her too.

If all of the incidents people described in this thread are "unreported," you really have to wonder what the true stats on it are.

I wish I had something to offer those who were hurt or used in much more extensive ways but I'm not sure I have anything to offer other than this story :/

/grouphugz

[East]

Follow Up.....

I started this at the end of November and here it is the end of February and I just realized something....

I haven't thought about it again since soon after I wrote this....and I haven't gone this long without it haunting me...ever....

I did read a lot at this other board about male rape victims and it helped me a lot to put it all in perspective. I ended up getting outside of myself which was probably the turning point for me

When I look at it now...it is like it happened to someone else...the emotion is gone. The first two I mentioned I will always believe I contributed to the circumstances though I didn't deserve to be raped....I had resolution about both of them already though

The ones who drugged me...I didn't do anything to contribute to it ..even if I was a slut...I always agreed to sex with another consenting adult. My being a slut had nothing to do with what these guys did...I did not agree to have sex with either of them...and they slipped something in my drink...

I don't feel like kicking their ass now...and the rage is gone...and that tells me that I have overcome it ...hopefully permanently. I do feel a little sick now after writing this sentence...maybe I still want to kick their ass...just a little?

I get it now...and I finally have some resolution. I think I had to accept I was a victim...VERY HARD FOR ME...but it's done now. It happened...and it's over.

I have wanted for years to have this go away and stop haunting me...and it has....so far...hope it is permanent as it has never been this long that I didn't think of it and when I do...I am not freaking out anymore....

So thanks everyone for listening...I think this thread was therapeutic for me.

[Lexington]

I'm glad you got on the other side of it, East. It's great to finally do battle with the demons outside the door.

To put a bit of levity here, I'll share a story that happened to a friend of mine. Not "worst" in the traditional sense, but still.

He had met this guy in a bar. They hit it off, and ended up going back to his place. Eventually, they ended up fucking doggy-style, with my friend as the bottom. After a few minutes of this, the guy pulled out and left the room. My friend was mildly confused by this, since the guy hadn't come, or said anything. But he figured he went to the bathroom to get more lube, or a quick drink of water, or something like that. So he waited. But after a few minutes of being there on his hands and knees, he got weirded out. He stood up and went looking for the guy.

The guy was sitting in the kitchen.
Eating a chesse sandwich.

My friend gave him a look. Like..."um, hello?"

The guy said, "Oh. I just wanted a cheese sandwich."

My friend said, "Seriously?!"

The guy said, "Oh, sorry - did you want one, too?"

My friend got dressed and left without another word.

My friend told me, "Look, I'm fine with guys preferring other men to me. But when a guy, in the middle of fucking me, decides 'You know what? I'd rather go eat a cheese sandwich'...that's a heavy blow to my self-esteem right there."

Lex

[meridannight]

i'm sorry this thing happened to you East.

i have no idea what any of this feels like, so i have no good advice to give. you probably were drugged, because Rohypnol (flunitrazepam) is a benzodiazepine. and benzodiazepine hypnotics have this side effect that they interfere with the encoding of new memories at sufficient doses. that means what it sounds like -- your brain loses the capacity to actually encode any memories. thus, you don't remember anything that happened. it's not physically possible to remember because the incident doesn't exist in your brain, it was never recorded. it's a true blackout. (this isn't what happens when it's a psychological block. when it's psychological the memories are all there in your brain, but you've blocked access to them due to their traumatic effect). and it's not just flunitrazepam that does that; alprazolam, for example, (also a benzodiazepine and something i use for my sleep issues) also has such a side effect at higher dosages and i have experienced it many times (i record all my drug use, and several times i've woken up to discover i've written a bunch of things about the effect the drug was having on me without remembering any of it having taken place or having written it). and most other benzos have this same effect, so ALL of them are potential date rape drugs (different ones at different efficacy) and they are readily available through prescriptions. the only way to be safe is not to accept drinks from strangers and/or people you don't trust. especially if you're a younger guy just starting out in the gay scene, although the age doesn't really matter. anyone can fall victim.

i've never even come close to having something like this happen to me. the worst i ever had it was back after high school graduation when i went and hitchhiked all throughout Europe all on my own. one trucker that offered me a ride tried to force himself on me when the night came. but i fought him off and had the situation under control. i learned quickly that all the guys that offered me a ride out of their own initiative had some ulterior motive and i stopped accepting such rides. never had any further issues after that.