A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables, and when he picked up a CD player to place in his sack, a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight out, and froze.
When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head, promised himself a vacation after the next big score, then clicked the light on and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard, "Jesus is watching you,"
Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?"
He hissed at the parrot.
"Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you," The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?"
"Moses," replied the bird. The burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird 'Moses'?"
"The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler 'Jesus', moron".
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I love Rottweiler's. They get a bad reputation like Pit Bulls and a lot of other dogs. Both Rott's and Pit Bull's would be good, obedient and loving dogs for someone like Virge, or StingRay. Their personality demands an Alpha male owner who trains and treats them like the fab breeds they are.
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Thanks Steve. It's an old one but many might now know it so it's always worth while posting it now and again.
"You can be young without money but you can't be old without money"
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
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Steverino I have a serious thing about dogs and ---
if I could do it responsibly for the dogs --- I'd have way more than two as full time co-residents. I'll have extras starting in spring when the first of the unwanted pups show up in shelters. I'll take them in 2-4 at a time to get them off death row, bring them home, let my dogs and cats educate them on manners for a couple weeks. After I've observed for a while, I'll start teaching them things that will give them an edge at finding homes. Tricks, obedience and most of all socializing them with all the kids in my neighborhood so when they get to a home full of kids they fit right in. I like to catch the one people are afraid of before the dogs have a chance to develop bad habits... Rotties, Pits, Dobies, etc.
I love my 2 prissy girlie labs for being sweet cuddlers and great play buddies. Any game I come up with they want to play it. They'll follow me around the house with their noses on my feet begging me to kick box with them... and they never bite. They love my singing and harmonize real well. If I carry a mesh bag of tennis balls out the door they run and find my potato cannon/tennis ball launcher and howl to show it to me in case I've forgotten. I can say, "go wake up Ray" and they GO do it! hahaha!
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Virge Wrote:I like to catch the one people are afraid of before the dogs have a chance to develop bad habits... Rotties, Pits, Dobies, etc.
Dobermans are one of the most intelligent breed there is, if not the most intelligent. been my favorite among dogs since i was 5 years old. i'll get one for myself.
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I had a pair of Rottie/German Shepherd crossbreeds. They were the last two girls in a litter that a co-worker had when her dog got out and bred unexpectedly.
They were a few months old when I got them, couple of bitches sure to get into trouble, so I named them Thelma and Louise.
At the time, I lived in the country and they were free-range dogs and lived a great life. Thelma died some years ago and Louise finally passed this year. When I left my home in Arkansas, I had to leave them with my sister there, as I couldn't find leased properties in the city that would accept large dogs. They had a great time while they were alive.
My dogs are always sweet, and I never allowed them to menace or intimidate. Children were perfectly safe around them, only in danger of being loved to death.
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Hardheaded1 Wrote:I had a pair of Rottie/German Shepherd crossbreeds. They were the last two girls in a litter that a co-worker had when her dog got out and bred unexpectedly.
They were a few months old when I got them, couple of bitches sure to get into trouble, so I named them Thelma and Louise.
At the time, I lived in the country and they were free-range dogs and lived a great life. Thelma died some years ago and Louise finally passed this year. When I left my home in Arkansas, I had to leave them with my sister there, as I couldn't find leased properties in the city that would accept large dogs. They had a great time while they were alive.
My dogs are always sweet, and I never allowed them to menace or intimidate. Children were perfectly safe around them, only in danger of being loved to death.
Dogs resembling Rotties have been found in mosaics from the Roman Empire. They were used to protect children and carry the money and jewels of travelers. SAY WHAT? It's true! What they'd do is take a pack of Rotties, put identical side bags on them to keep robbers from spotting the one dog with the loot and then hit the road. Anyone attacking a dog became dog food.
I had a Dobie and Collie when I was a kid and -- no offense to Collies but they are sweet loving morons compared to Dobies. Mine was a year old when she came and I was 7. When I was 18 she was still treating me like a kid -- protective around strangers. Normally if the doorbell rang when my parents were home, Bertha barely noticed. If I was home alone when the door bell rang she'd go out the doggie door into the back yard, climb the fence, circle the house to see who it was and decide either to chase them off or invite them in if she knew them. If she got bored at home she used to turn up at school around lunch time -- a five mile trek.... and be home before I got there. Crazy dog.
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