Would you go out with a Disabled person?

[fjp999]

I guess one should ask themselves this question: What would I do if I was suddenly made disabled? Would I want my love/partner to stay and take care of me or leave and live a fuller life (as some seem to be saying - that disabled are not capable of living as full lives as desired). I have heard of both happening. I know of a man who was severely burned and all he asked his partner was to put cream on his back. The partner left. Another friend had a stroke. He has not recovered much. He and his partner were just about to end their relationship before the stroke but his partner stayed and for years now has helped make their lives more complete.

[Star Twister]

Thanks again, Joseph. I've learned a lot from what you have written in this discussion. mile:
Where does this useful sharing of information get us :confused:

Marshy you do talk a lot of sense........



.

I would like to put my two pennies worth in........

It wouldn't bother me if my b/f was disabled but I do think it depends if you want a physical relationship. If the disabled person couldn't offer you what you wanted physically, would that be a problem ????

Just a thought !

[fredv3b]

It wouldn't bother me if my b/f was disabled but I do think it depends if you want a physical relationship. If the disabled person couldn't offer you what you wanted physically, would that be a problem ????

As far as I am aware love at first sight is less common than not and often times first impressions are misleading. My question is if you were to happen to 'bump into' a guy who, at first impression, did not appear to be boyfriend material how likely would you be to get to know him better, find out if he really was boyfriend material or not? Would you be any less likely if he was disabled?

My point is that all would-be disabled boyfriends must go through a period of being disabled POSSIBLE love interest, is that where some of the difficulty is?

[yar]

Love and happiness is a rare commodity take it where ever you find it and live well with a clear mind.

[marshlander]

... My point is that all would-be disabled boyfriends must go through a period of being disabled POSSIBLE love interest, is that where some of the difficulty is?

I think Fred has nailed it for me. The worlds of the disabled and the more able-bodied are often segregated. People with a disability may find themselves thrown into the company of the more able if they are able to work or attend a regular school, but I would guess there are few more-able people who choose to spend time with those significantly less able unless the company is enforced through, say, an accident of family or through choosing to work in the caring professions.

I suppose there are cases of professional carers who learn to love their clients, but that brings me back to a point I made elsewhere; namely, is it realistic for such a relationship to be equal? Co-dependence can be very unhealthy. Despite these thoughts I see no reason why such a relationship should not be possible ... it is just less likely, I suppose and will in reality depend on the less able candidate being able and prepared to move in the world of the more able.

[joseph]

hello. i dont even now for boyfrinds! but if you are disaabled and not disabled you can still be bestfrinds and frinds i think .but what if what is was you was both disabled but diffrent kind like pisicle disabilty and learning disability.

[marshlander]

hello. i dont even now for boyfrinds! but if you are disaabled and not disabled you can still be bestfrinds and frinds i think .but what if what is was you was both disabled but diffrent kind like pisicle disabilty and learning disability.

I think this is why I find it difficult, Joseph. Do your friends talk about the kinds of disabilities they have? I have heard some physically disabled people refer to themselves or others as "crip" or "spas", which I guess is the same kind of humour that allows Albert and me to make jokes about "fairies" or "queens", but I would not be able to use those words to or about people who can't walk or who have cerebral palsy.

[joseph]

my friends not relly say about a botu how come they are disabled and about it. and not any words. most of my frinds is disabled but some of them not like marshlander!

[marshlander]

my friends not relly say about a botu how come they are disabled and about it. and not any words. most of my frinds is disabled but some of them not like marshlander!

Thank you, Joseph mile:

[Low__x]

I would, if they looked hot in the chair?
If they looked like a Vietnam Vet or something, not so much...

Lol. Coot...
I feel like a jackass, mann.