Not wanting help I just need to complain....

[Rareboy]

I think you need to contact a social services agency and see what they can do for you given your impending eviction and employment and health issues.

And then move. To someplace where it is just your space. Don't even tell your ex where you are moving to. Just tell him it is finally over and done with.

[araya]

it's not him I want to punch right now, but you
YOU ARE NOT A DOORMAT, don't let yourself keep bbbeing stepped on!
you're kind, you're too kind but your kindness is getting you nowhere! you keep giving your kindness to those who didnt even deserve it
I agree with rareboy, if he didnt want to move out then you get outta there, disappear from his sight, don't tell him about where you gonna move
even if he found you in the future and crawling, begging to you to have you back, KICK HIM, don't let him go near you again, it's time for you to stop giving him the kidness he didnt deserve

[Bowyn Aerrow]

I have about $7.00 in quarters. I can afford to get down to the corner market for a coffee and a doughnut... then....????

[Rareboy]

Then?

This is why the time has come to contact a social services agency. To reach out for constructive assistance in finding you housing and income support.

To do nothing will result in you being evicted and literally homeless. No one would want to see this happen.

[araya]

I have about $7.00 in quarters. I can afford to get down to the corner market for a coffee and a doughnut... then....????

maybe not right away, just stop spoiling him from now on and plan your grand escape from that asshole

NO MORE KINDNESS, this is not you being selfish or being bad, you really need to draw a clear line on the sand, there's no longer US, it's only you and me, and you can go fuck yourself.

stop making excuses for him, stop worrying about his thing, stop taking care of the shits he threw at you, if you don't, I hope someone from this forum come to you and whack you in the head so you realize what kind of shit you're stuck in -I wish I could personally whack you on the head-

time to free yourself from the unnecessary shackles that bound you to him, TIME TO BE FREE AND FLY, BABY!!!

[Borg69]

I have about $7.00 in quarters. I can afford to get down to the corner market for a coffee and a doughnut... then....????

Your new landlord offered you $2,000. To move. Take it.

I suspect there may be some co-dependency with you and the ex. He's not perfect, but he's familiar. Someone to talk to. He has a job and can at least help out minimally. ... and to whatever degree he "needs" you and relies on you- pushing some kind of buttons so you feel productive and a sense of accomplishing something. And he always (eventually) comes home.


Better than being alone. And to whatever degree aside from what he supplies financially you need him too.

I get it. I really do. Two lost souls whom the world kicked and overlooked, turned its back on whom (you feel) no one else would have. At least you have each other. For better or worse to the end. Unconventional, but better than nothing.

There are other paths to take. Your current one is a dead end. Please see this.

[araya]

I know a couple who lived more than 35 years tho' they hated each other's guts
they started off good, loving each other, as the time goes by, problems keep coming, they start yelling at each other, fighting -one keeps deceiving and the other keeps being deceived but still trying to endure it- and all that yet they still come back together
until they reached the peak of their relationship and they divorced
it's too painful to stay like the way it was before and it's not healthy to stay in a way that keep hurting one of them
even now they already separated, I know deep down they still have this love to each other despite the painful experiences they've gone through

it's hard to let go, lovers, friend, people close to you
people tend to let their loved ones, the one closest to their heart and all that to hurt them
but how long can you endure the pain? at what extent will you allow him to hurt you?
it has to end soon, the sooner the better

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Lets see if I can keep this concise:

1. I'm concerned if I accept any money from the landlord at this time that it will mean that I have accepted it as full payment for all the work I have done. So no, I'm not going to accept $2000.00 to move when I have 2883 hours of work I need to be paid for. which even at minimum wage comes to well over $25,000.

2. October of 2012 I had a 'few seizures' in a condition called status epilepticus. I downplayed that for everyone here, but the reality is I almost died. The state takes such matters seriously and refuses to allow me to drive. They yanked my license and the last time I went to a doctor to get him to sign off I ended up having a seizure in office. he laughed -literally - at my request to get my license back.

3. In the past year six of my friends have died and I have gone to their funerals. Unfortunately I had about 8 friends, two of which who have moved to such far away exotic places as Oregon.

While no doubt for many of you you can just get on the phone and call someone to come help you pack and drive a truck full of crap to a new location, I have to hire a person or persons since everyone I know is now dead. And those who are alive are in worse shape than me or so far away that they will laugh at me if I ask them to come fly out here and help me pack and move.

Co-dependency:

Yes I suppose there is a bit of that going on Mr. Borg. If you followed my link to my post in 2012 after my minor stay in hospital you will note that it was my ex then roommate who discovered my seizing body on the floor in a minor pool of blood. Since then I have been slightly afraid of being alone. I have no idea why.

Three nights ago I ended up having a seizure on the way to the bathroom - not one of my typical absence seizures, a grandmal - tonic colonic type seizure. That on top of the fifth round of flu this year I ended up spending half the night or more sleeping on the floor as I didn't have the energy to crawl the rest of my way to bed.

I lay there in my own piss (on the way to the bathroom, tonic colonic seizures often cause pissing and even defecation - joy) so I had to also find the energy to clean up my own urine before I could manage to fall into bed.

So yes, there is an ulterior motive for wanting someone around, I am scared to death that I'm going to have another status epilepticus and no one will find the body until the stench is pretty high and well after my little dog has eaten my eye balls.

Lawyers appear to want me to come into their office. Unfortunately the nearest bus stop is 1.9 miles away. I am currently suffering from the flu (again) and even then I am down to 140 pounds, weak as a kitten and in pain, lots and lots and lots of pain from my herniated disk. I did send a couple emails to that one link, and I get the automated someone will get with you shortly reply. phone calls get me the never ended musak of being on hold. Apparently lawyers are busy people.

So while I know that I need to do something - and have a fair idea of the things that should be done, any suggestion to 'do something' is pretty much like telling a legless man to get up and walk.

[Cuddly]

Sorry to hear that Bowyn. I honestly can't come up with any solutions, save robbing a bank, getting caught and making a home in prison.
You need legal aid, so you can either stay or be compensated properly and moved into suitable quarters, you and the ex.

[bluerealm]

I feel like i want to say something but i don't know what to say.

you need to be calm and not give up. keep making phone calls and do what you can.

the stress could be causing you to get sick.

I don't feel very much. but i feel bad for you.