Dating and Disclosure -Something unique about me

[MountLogan]

Hi everyone!
Since I register to this forum, less than two weeks ago, I’ve been kind of quiet about me, mostly replying.

I’ve said on another treat they are many things about me left unsaid, things that could make me more attractive to some and less to others. One of those things that make myself «me», unique like a rainbow (shoot out to BrianNorth today's awesome video), is definitely my l-e-f-t hand.

I have, wait for it, a Ninja turtle left hand. How cool is that. In fact, I am pretty sure Ninja turtle hands have been inspired by me since the first appearance of the Ninja turtles are also the year my hand have been shaped this way (1984). Or maybe I’m the one being inspired lol

Growing up I always found that cool. Peoples called me Raphael, Michelangelo, Donatello and Leonardo. I guess a kid can have worst nicknames growing up at school than that. I feel so lucky being born the same decade our amazing turtles. We share a special bond lol

I’ve always accepted I am different because I wouldn’t be me without it. I am not saying from time to time I'm not wishing to be «normal» but it’s who I am. On the good side of thing it’s an icebreaker when I meet someone new. Peoples always had been surprise how I can talk about it and explain why my hand is like this so easily. I’ve told this story probably a million times (nothing juicy or fancy), so I can tell this story perfectly.

So I am not coming here to ask if someone could love me the way I am I know they could if they really love me. I am so lucky because nothing I cannot do and all my friends and family often forget I’m different because on a day-to-day basis this is nothing. So I know my lover will soon forget about it too.

However, I need a piece of advice when should I let the other person know when I go on a date? Should I let them know before we go on a date, should I wait the date and say «see this my hand, cool hein», should I wait the person to figure it out for themselves by example when we are fooling around? I understand this can be an deal breaker for some.

My hand pretty much look like that but not green lol I am still a human being after all lol



So my question to all of you is this… let say you are about to meet a guy like me when would you like to know and when should I tell you.

But I know they is no perfect answer just want to hear your thought

Thanks and Goodnight,

[shirogane]

A turtle eh, I used to be fan of Ninja turtle, not anymore after that Micheal Bay-movie. Since I was a child, i always want to become Don, maybe I like long stick LOL.

For your question,, i don't know. If i hang out with a guy and he keeps hiding his left hand.....That grants me ton of questions. But if you show it to me immediately, that's gonna be a shocking info for me. Maybe I should let you feel comfortable to talk about it. A good-story ehh, i like background story about strange things

Last one, I think Ok, if you don't behave like some jerk, I'm absolutely OK with your left hand. It just a hand with 3 fingers, what could go wrong, i think 3 is a perfect number.

[Steve]

Complicated question Logan.

I was in a nasty car accident when I was eighteen. Left me with a bizarre question marked shaped scar on the right side of my head and a bunch of mental health issues. Before I was lucky enough to meet my partner I was kind of at a loss at how to tell guys that I might well be an emotional handful in terms of a long term relationship. If things between a guy and I started to feel more serious, I filled him in on my past and my mental health issues. If it was just a date, especially a first date (pretty much a hook-up), I usually just glossed over my scar (it is visable through the hair on my skull) and the details.

With you it's an immediate physical issue. If it were me I'd probably show the guy/date fairly soon into the conversation. You'll know by his reaction whether he has problems with you or not. I'd still give the guy a little while to get to know you after telling/showing him your hand. He may just find you irresistible, because frankly you sound like a great guy to me.

The good thing about turtles is that they have hard shell protection. Rejection happens to all of us, no matter our shape. Keep your head poked out of that shell, but use it if you need to. I'd hate to see you hurt.

(BTW, which TMNT are you? Raphael, Michelangelo, Donatello and Leonardo are all the best of the best in terms of fine artists. There's nothing to be ashamed of when you're associated with a grand master artist. Even if those are TMNT names, I'd feel sort of complimented at being called any one of them. Your hand doesn't define you, even if it has influenced who you are. Don't let anyone define you by reducing you to one unique characteristic. We're all more than the sum of our parts.)

xx

[Virge]

[SIZE="7"]

[COLOR="Red"]Fingers?
I know all about them.

Here's how
I learned to count on mine.



and I found out why we
have so many extras.



And they come in handy
cleaning tight spots.



hahahahahahaha!

[/COLOR]

[/SIZE]

[Cuddly]

In my opinion your hand is no big deal, unless you make it one. I see no reason you should be like "Oh by the way, before we go on a date, know that my hand is weird!", it's just another unique thing about you, like your nose or a birthmark or whatever.

[Borg69]

So many aliens here... I knew there was a reason why I liked this place!

[Hardheaded1]

If I were to meet you, I'd appreciate some light remark early in our conversation. That would allow easy conversation and get the subject out of the way so that the person could be the center of curiosity, not the hand.

It would also help me gage whether it is a sensitive topic or open for humor, etc.

I'm glad you told us. It's important. But it could never be any kind of friend impediment.

I knew a troll on JUB when I was there, and he made fun of Stephen Hawking's appearance, directly implying no one would want to kiss that face. I was incensed, not that anyone would believe the troll, but that others with physical impairments would feel more self-conscious because of that ridicule.

Of course, most people know better and do not think such childish things.

Thanks for sharing and being transparent.

[Bhp91126]

The lengths people go to, to get out of piano-lessons...

if you don't make a big deal out of having a unique hand, potential dates shouldn't either. And those who are "disgusted" by it, you don't want as friends anyway.

[Borg69]

I'm curious if your twin is the same, or was it a physical accident?

[Darius]

It would probably only be a big deal if you made it one. Except for a few assholes, of course.
It wouldn't matter to me.