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What's the hope?
#21
^ What he said. Take one small step at a time. There is no need to accomplish some kind of a major self-transformation. Just pick up a goal, some ridiculously small goal, and try to achieve it. Then move on to the next one.

Moreover, if you got any friends or family that you could talk to (about feeling down, wanting to get some help, whatever), do that. There's absolutely no need to think that you have to deal with mental health issues on your own. That's what friends and family are for. Just talking to someone (who has a reasonable sense of empathy, keep away from judgmental people) can be very encouraging.

There are no magic tricks to get our of your loop of negative feelings but I wish you the best.
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#22
Something very tragic and very traumatic happened to me seven years ago and the thing is when I came through so much after being discovered...I sunk into a deep, manic depression and due to the circumstances and the incident in a whole, I really wanted my life to be over and for awhile...it appeared to be that way and yet...I was welcoming it to be over. However, what I finally realized with a lot of therapy and counseling that its not over until God is ready for it to be over. I also realized that due to those severe circumstances that God had something else planned for me and therefore, he was not ready for me to leave this earth. To make a very long story short...there comes a point where even with therapy and counseling, you have to have some kind of determination to move forward on your own even if you start with "baby steps" and then gradually progress from that. For example, since then, I had went back to school ....although I had to do it online because during this period ...I was not able to talk and I had suffered from a severe anxiety disorder. I was told by doctors and supporters that this was a really bad idea and I would not get through the first year successfully. Yes..it was a struggle but I was determined to hang in there just to prove all of them wrong. I graduated almost two years now with a Masters' Degree and top 5 of my class with 4.0 GPA overall. So you see...there is hope out there and you can have it and move on to be a much better person than you are now...I KNOW THIS...because although my situation was very severe...I now considered it to be a blessing in disguise because I am like a ray of hope especially when I share my story as my testimony. God Bless...and Please..Don't Give Up Now...God has something in store for you that is well beyond your expectations...stand firm and just have a little hope...
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#23
estudantet Wrote:I guess I am giving up. At least from my "gay life". I have to learn how to focus on other aspects of my life... maybe try to make them better cause pretty much everything sucks right now..

And I'm sorry, being forceful only made me feel like shit... that doesn't work on me.

You have to have faith that it doesn't have to be as bad as you see it now. Nobody can give you hope.

Look at it this way, what choice have you got? You are you, nobody else. You can't be anybody else.

I was once terrified of my sexuality. It ruled my thoughts. I developed eating disorders because of it you have to fight them.

If you feel like you are at rock bottom, there isn't any where to go but up. That should give you hope.
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