Strange things heard on the streets

[LONDONER]

These are taken from the London edition of "Time Out":

Am I always the last one to find out that Ricky Matin is gay?

Tell her to do that one, man. You can't deal with that on top of your own anxieties about red wine vinegar.

What would you call a really tall midget?

When I die, I'm going to have a bench put up somewhere. That's how much I like sitting down.

Will it be safe to watch the partial eclipse on TV?

You know, it's weird, but pain au chocolat really reminds me of France.

I tend to get the Northern Line more than the others if I can, because I'm Northern.

I simply cannot believe the inefficiency of the Vegetarian Society.

I just fancy her because she works in a brewery.

[Rareboy]

... the women come and go
Talking of Michelangelo.

Isn't it just so....