public fondeling

[Pyromancer]

Let me reiterate my question.
I once had a young guy (16 or so) ask me for advice. He used to drink pretty heavily every day. He blacked out at least once or twice a week. His messages to me would ask how to keep this from happening....but usually framed within context how fucking awesome it was getting drunk. I told him "The first step in quitting is wanting to. You're not there. Let me know when you are."

....the first step in quitting is wanting to. You're not there. Let me know when you are.

Lex

When I was 19, I had my 5th (and last) alcohol detox admission. I was whining to a counselor, asking. But HOW do I stop drinking? His response was, You just don't drink. And I was like, WTF??!?!?
He said:
-you get up in the morning and you just don't drink
-you eat your breakfast and you just don't drink
-you go to work and you just don't drink
-you have a shitty morning but you just don't drink

And he went on to name every possible activity in my day...and he repeated it every day...and when I left rehab, he sent me off to talk to another old timer in my AA group...a guy who said the same damn thing. Almost 6 years later I can say for sure, they were right. I think that this is what [MENTION=20912]Iceblink[/MENTION] was saying earlier...no magic, no tricks or inside info...just...stop...

[Butterfingers]

To me, a want is ok, yesterday I wanted to spank a dude in the locker room.
We have to make a distinction between our wants and other people rights. You want to fondle, so do I, I love to play with a guys cock.
He has a right to be asked first, it's unlikely that most guys will say "have at it", so we don't ask, we know that they prefer not to be touched.
You are putting your wants above the rights of others, if someone wants your car, should they take it?
You steal a feel, the other guy steals a car, both disrespect the rights of others. Just because I desire a mans car, that does not give me a right to take it.
Quit stealing.

[MikeW]

I don't know how to stop... Thoughts?

You're allowing yourself to act out an unhealthy compulsion -- unhealthy for you on a lot of levels. If you don't stop it, eventually someone will sop it for you. Is that what you want? The desire to engage in compulsive behaviors won't go away so long as you don't use your own will power to stop.

[Borg69]

Your problem is self correcting.

What you're doing now will get old. You'll need that excitement back. You'll get more bold. Grab firmer, more often... until you eventually grab the wrong guy whom either beats the crap out of you, knifes you, or presses charges for sexual assault.

You're like every drunk driver who thinks you're the one special guy who can handle it... get away with it...

And you might. For a while. The odds are against you. Ready to roll the dice again?

[Camfer]

I live in a small town. If I do an internet search on registered sex offenders in my zip code, I get the name and a recent picture of someone I know from this town. For the rest of his life, his name and face will come up for anyone who cares to look for it, no matter where he lives.

OP, do an internet search on registered sex offender and your zip code. Imagine that it is your name and your recent mug shot that appears on the top of that search. You might actually know someone who appears on that search. You can ask them how it has affected their lives.

So, OP, is that what you secretly want? To be a registered sex offender? If not, maybe this urge can be channeled in a different way.

Go to a gay bathhouse or sex club. Not everyone will tolerate your behavior, but chances are you won't get physically assaulted or arrested for your actions, since that sort of behavior can be indulged there. Chances are you won't become a registered sex offender if you limit your action to that setting.

[trywait]

no no. that's considered sexual battery when you fondle someone else without her or his consent. don't act upon it.

[East]

I hear the TSA has a few openings for gropers since they fired two this week...

[Edward]

Think about the possible punch in the face from the man you want to fondle. This might make you to think one more time about what you're about to do.

[East]

I was thinking about this...never really heard anyone mention this before...so I want to ask one thing...

If it was you in a situation where someone you didn't know was groping you or touching you...and it was unwanted by you...how would you feel about it?

If you put yourself in their shoes...it might help unlock your compulsion...or at least help you to see it differently...

What everyone else said is true as well....and so I think in order to get past it..you probably have to try to figure out what is at the root of your desire to do this?

[Rareboy]

The first thing the OP should do is seek qualified psychiatric help. Seriously.