Don't assume...get the facts!!!!

[JohnSomebody]

Hey Guys:

I want to tell you about a guy that I met last year while visiting my cousin in Los Angeles. This guy and I had ...I thought...established a pretty good connection. However, he did have a concern over the fact that I tend to be a private individual and I tend to be pretty shy until I get to know you better. Nonetheless...I am very cordial and pleasant upon meeting me. While on a date prior to my last night in California...we had exchanged contact information. I gave him not only my mobile no. but I also gave him my residence phone # as well. Now..the reason that I still have a residence phone is that over the past six months...one of my older brothers had been staying with me. Unfortunately, he's the type that loves to talk on the phone constantly throughout the day and night...and he also love watching TV non-stop as well when he's home. Since I work evening hours and not home that much during the day...I rarely watch television and I have my cell phone for contact so I have no use for a residence phone. However, I made him get cable and phone service while he was staying with me in his name so that he can pay the bill which he did. My brother is now in prison and the cable company had offered me a package deal with internet service at a low discount price if I maintain the service which I did. Therefore, if you happen to call that residence phone...either on your caller ID or your TV screen...his name and the number will appear and both our first names begins with the letter "J".

Now..with the time that I spent with this guy...I noticed that he can be very assuming and somewhat insecure which did not sit well with me. I had came to the conclusion that this guy had been hurt really bad by someone whom he loved dearly which had caused him to have this kind of behavior. Usually whenever I hear from him...he contacts me on my cell...however...last week...I had just came out of the shower and this weird phone number appeared on my TV screen that I've never saw before. I got on the computer and Google the area code which I found out that this is the location where he lives. However, he never left a message...he just hung up. The next day...the number appeared again..this time I picked and said "Hello"...the caller just held the phone while I'm saying "hello" and they never respond. They ended up just hanging up. Therefore, this guy contacted my cousin and told him that when he dialed the number...he got a different name which was my brother's instead of mine which made him think that I was hiding something. Like I told my cousin...if I was hiding something..then why would I had given him that phone number knowing that another name would appear. In fact, since he always contacted on the cell phone...I was surprised that he decided to call the residence phone. This incident lead to him not wanting to contact me anymore which is fine because I don't need anyone like this in my life...but I have to wonder does he feel guilty for assuming something that's not true instead of just confronting me if he went that far to find that information out?

[ShiftyNJ]

I noticed that he can be very assuming and somewhat insecure which did not sit well with me. I had came to the conclusion that this guy had been hurt really bad by someone whom he loved dearly which had caused him to have this kind of behavior.

I have experienced this too, and came to the conclusion there's a loop pattern with this behavior. They are so used to be kicked around that they unconsciously seek it out and/or goad you into doing something to self-fulfill the prophesy. Now when I see signs of that behavior, I run.

[GenerousGreed]

It does sound like there has been some misunderstandings from both sides. My only advice would be to clarify the situation and see how he reacts. What follows is up to the two of you.

Hope you find a happy solution to this ^^

[Pyromancer]

A couple years ago I got the same kind of deal from FIOS...TV/internet/phone...but I'd just come out of dealing with a stalker situation and was a bit paranoid about listing a landline in my own name...so the whole package was listed in my best friends name...so his name would come up and he recorded a generic reply for the answering service. I had a few people ask me why it was in his name, or who he was...but at least they asked.

I can see why you're put off by the guy. He should have just asked.

[Lexington]

You can always text the guy back. "Hope you weren't weirded out by the name on the phone being a bit different - the phone's under my brother's name, and I've never bothered to change it to mine". Then, quit thinking about it.

Lex