Posts: 1,725
Threads: 594
Joined: Jun 2012
Mood: None
I cannot write this from my real name but.... I like a young priest. From a close friend of his I I know he's gay. I've started to come to the church often just to see him. I don't know his personally but I really would like to. Is it worth trying?
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
•
Priests... LOL Shall we also talk Monks and Friars as well?
Assuming you mean a man of the cloth who has taken Vows, which includes such silly notions like Poverty, Obedience and Celibacy - then chances are high (er than most people may believe) your chances with him are excellent.
I had a faith once - in the Church and in men of the cloth - until I went through my crises of coming out and seeking the advice of a Friar - and other clergy I knew at the time that all confessed that sex behind the pulpit happens all the time and that I shouldn't allow that to stand in my way of ministry....
The problem with the concept of taking vows, especially of celibacy, is that its contrary to human nature. Sure a few manage it (I guess - does masturbation count?), but many others end up seeking sex on the side - hidden sex.
Until the whole Catholic Church imploded with the molestation thing - it was very, very common for gay men to seek a position in the church to take vows to cover the reason why they were not married. And also, there was the underlying concept of Homosexuality is a sin, as long as you act on it.
This still goes on, however the church has a Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy - or better yet a policy that strictly (kinda sorta) forbids gays from joining - this is the response the Vatican had when the whole scandal broke.
What all of this means is:
1. IF he is a priest who has taken vows, chances are high he thinks his 'secret' is kept from his boss (The church).
2. He most likely is striving to not be a sinner - meaning he's gay, sure, but he isn't sinning as long as he ain't acting on it.
3. Chances are high that in a few years, once this whole celibacy thing wears thin he will be looking for boys on the side. IF he has already reached that point, then what you could have with him is casual, secret encounters. If you are obviously gay, or everyone knows you are - he won't touch you with a ten foot pole because he has a secret he must keep.
Assuming for the moment that he is a priest as in clergy that DOES NOT take vows that include Celibacy, then you have to appeal to his understanding of Marriage and tolerance of homosexual couples (loving, monogamous couples) and how that all works in his Church.
Understand that while some individual churches are tolerant and accepting, that doesn't mean their whole denomination is. For instance, in the world of the Catholicism, there are a number of individual parish churches which do NOT hold the same stance as the Vatican. Sames holds true for the Episcopalian/Anglican Church. While true they hired their first gay bishop a decade ago, there is still a lot of dissent on the issue of homosexuality, including the marriage thing.
Last thoughts: Then there is your true motivation. Sure he might look hot, he may be kind and gentle and all of that - but is your motivation because of those things, or are you in hot pursuit of that which you cannot have?
A lot of people pursue that which they cannot have because in the long run they are pretty certain that they won't have to commit, won't be put to task to actually go through with whatever.
So if you have had a few bad relationships or something that has turned you off the notion of relationships, it is possible that your motivation here isn't about love, or expectation to get into a relationship, but that you already know that you won't get hurt (Again?) thus are attracted to what you can not have because its 'safe'.
•
I think if you are into really kinky and nasty sex you should pursue him. .........
Usually the "purest" ones are the nastiest ones...yin and yang....
•
Posts: 1,725
Threads: 594
Joined: Jun 2012
Mood: None
I mean - trying get to know him closer, maybe even relationship with him. But how do I do it? Should I just come up to him telling I like him?
No, it's not about fact that he's a priest, a forbidden fruit. He's just a handsome man and I like him.
•
I guess it would depend on the denomination. Some priests can't have sex, others can't be in relationships, others can't do either one. I doubt he'll throw over his vows in order to hook up or date you, so you'd best make sure that that's not going to be an issue.
If it isn't, I'd say just go for it. Introduce yourself to him, say you've been to his services a few times, and you like what you've seen.
Lex
•
Posts: 1,725
Threads: 594
Joined: Jun 2012
Mood: None
" Introduce yourself to him, say you've been to his services a few
times, and you like what you've seen."
Ok and what next? I don't really know how to hit on men.
•
I don't know where you're from, but I'm Irish and, here, people strike up conversations with the parish priests when they meet them in public all the time and invite them back to their homes for tea and shit. Maybe you could volunteer for stuff in the community.
•
If he's an Episcopal priest, it's fine. He is allowed to be openly gay, date, marry...
If he's a Catholic priest and you're a complete masochist, by all means, go for it...if you enjoy being fucked in private and shunned in public...if taking the brunt of your "bf's" guilt appeals to you...then yeah...if you get off on being used...(Oh my, do I sound bitter? Soooo sorry...).
•
