I can't get over him being feminine?!

[Beaux]

You are correct. I am not out. He only has a more soft and higher voice and a couple of feminine mannerism. Apart from this, he is like any other guy. But, it is obvious and I know others take notice to it as well. You are also correct in the fact that I am somewhat scared that by hanging around a guy that shows gay traits, could label me the same. However, we haven't gone out in public or anything. We just chill at his place and hang out, when he is free and home alone. I can admit, the more time I have spent with him this past week, the more I am beginning to like him, despite his effeminate traits.

I realize that you don't see it this way, but your original post is really offensive on quite a few levels. I'm not even going to go into all of that though.

In your above quote, you have pretty much explained your true feelings--You are scared. You are afraid of being "Outed-by-Association". That, my friend, is solely your problem and as long as you remain in that state of mind, you have no business being in any relationship that involves more than first names, imo.

Let's talk about "Strength" and "Being a Man" for a minute. ANY Effeminate Out Gay Man who is living his life authentically, is showing MAGNITUDES more Strength and Character than someone hiding in the closet worried about what people think about him. Hands Down.

Do you know which people have done, and continue to do, the MOST damage to our community..? The Self-Hating Faggot. You should consider yourself lucky he is willing to be seen with a coward.

Think I am being too hard on you? If your man enough to want to fuck another man, at least have to balls to be honest about it; instead you are projecting your shame onto him! That shit just doesn't fly with me.

~Beaux

[Beaux]

Ok, having slept on it, perhaps I was a BIT harsh in my last post. However, most of my opinions stand, I will only apologize for the tone of my remarks, not the content.

Sorry if I came across as hurtful.

~Beaux

[ca1050]

I realize that you don't see it this way, but your original post is really offensive on quite a few levels. I'm not even going to go into all of that though.

In your above quote, you have pretty much explained your true feelings--You are scared. You are afraid of being "Outed-by-Association". That, my friend, is solely your problem and as long as you remain in that state of mind, you have no business being in any relationship that involves more than first names, imo.

Let's talk about "Strength" and "Being a Man" for a minute. ANY Effeminate Out Gay Man who is living his life authentically, is showing MAGNITUDES more Strength and Character than someone hiding in the closet worried about what people think about him. Hands Down.

Do you know which people have done, and continue to do, the MOST damage to our community..? The Self-Hating Faggot. You should consider yourself lucky he is willing to be seen with a coward.

Think I am being too hard on you? If your man enough to want to fuck another man, at least have to balls to be honest about it; instead you are projecting your shame onto him! That shit just doesn't fly with me.
~Beaux

It's fine. Everyone has the right to his opinion. However, I would like to clarify that I have never been attracted to the feminine trait. I have a friend who is gay and feminine and I think of him no less than any other person. If anything, I agree with you. It takes courage for someone to show off his effeminate trait.
Furthermore, I am not a self-hating faggot. I am in the closet still because not only am I still figuring everything out, but I know the damage it would cause within my family and personal life thanks to the world and family I was brought up in, not by choice. For this, I am going against everything I was taught to be wrong and a sin, everything I was told to do growing up and still continually told, and am deciding for myself for once what I think I may be happiest doing. Again, I am still unsure what that is, but I am trying. I do like this guy, I do enjoy being with him, I don't necessarily want to or am aiming towards, as you termed it, "fuck another man" simply because I don't care about a sexual relationship as much as an emotional one.

But again, thank you for your opinion.

[erectrician4u]

hey dude some guys want to be with masculine male guys its a thing that alotr of guys go for if you want someone feminine then you go with girls and if you want a guy you want a guy not a person that act dresses or has mannerisms or carries a purse and then there are other guys that want it all the female mannerisms with the male pipes its a crazy mixed up world and if you dont want this in your relationship you need to let that be known in all fairness would you want to be strung along until your partner figures out if he or she can learn to love you

[Anocxu]

Wasting time much?
If you're friend were to read what you wrote here . .
He would be devastated.
Tell him how you truly feel set him free.
You'll understand how this truly feels when a crush tells you you're not MAN enough!