We had a great time visiting Grandma

[LJay]

So Virge, does this mean you are opening a salon for stretching and coloring?

[LONDONER]

How did this thread manage to get from mobile 'phones. to scrotums?

[East]

I know I've mentioned it a couple times here on the forum. Mine is actual physical damage to the inner most ear that happened when I was 18 years old. It was a culmination of two things: First, my dad had this ridiculous notion that if you removed the muffler from a tractor, that would extend its gas millage. This was at a time when fuel was 35 cents a gallon! Anyway, he had me up on an International Harvester for EIGHTEEN HOURS IN ONE DAY with the damn muffler removed. I don't even know how to describe what that was like; the exhaust being in front of me about four or five feet, papapapapapapaing about as loud as a fire cracker going off a hundred times a minute. Of course back in those days, none of us ever thought to wear ear protection, either.

After that my ears were ringing like crazy AND IT NEVER WENT WAY.

Some years later as an adult I went to a hearing specialist. I remember they put me in a sound proof booth to test my hearing and at one point the guy running the test was talking outside the booth to someone else and I had NO PROBLEM hearing them.

The point being, this isn't a VOLUME issue. People don't understand this. If I mention I'm partially deaf to people, they always start talking louder -- which is thoughtful but doesn't necessarily address my problem. MY PROBLEM is a "comprehension" issue. Since my ears are ringing constantly (it is always bad but being around high-frequency sound generators like electric motors, you know, blenders, vacuum cleaners, leaf blowers, jet engines, that sort of thing, only makes it worse) the consonant sounds that allow us to differentiate "bat" from "hat" or "cat" from "sat" not to mention "that," "brat," "splat," "rat," "fat," "pat," "tat," and "vat" are lost on me. They all get "mushed" together and sound alike. BUT if I can see your lips moving, I can SEE those sound differences being formed (a consonant is a letter/sound that requires the closure of the air passageway by teeth, tongue, lips or constriction of the vocal cords). So you have to be FACING me and I have to be looking right at your mouth.

One of the funny things is, if I can't see your mouth moving, I do "hear" you talking but what my brain MAKES of your words can be something totally ridiculous. LOL, I can't think of a good example because, what happens is I hear someone say something and I *know* what they "said" made NO SENSE at all; therefore I'm pretty sure I didn't hear them correctly. I have to say, "What?" and then make sure I'm facing them or they're facing me. OH... and the worst are mumblers! People who mumble their words by barely moving their lips at all. FUCK THAT! I can ask someone like that three times what they said and STILL not be sure I have it right and usually don't. ENUNCIATE PEOPLE!!! ENUNCIATE!

The other thing is being in crowded rooms... like restaurants or bars. If I'm in a noisy bar and talking with some hottie, even IF I can see their lips moving, I have NO IDEA what they're saying. They can put their mouth right next to my ear, makes no difference.

The thing about a disability like this is that it isn't "visible". I've worked at the same place with the same boss for almost 40 years. She knows me very well and knows exactly what my issue is but does that prevent her from saying something to me with her back turned toward me? Nope! She knows but she doesn't "get it" and hasn't ever gotten it and never will. I say to her over and over and over again, "If I can't see your lips moving, chances are I'm not understanding what you're saying." So, she turns to me and repeats it... but damn, you'd think someone would "get it" eventually, but nope!

As far as disabilities go, though, I'd rather this than a lot of others. I rely so heavily on my vision, I can't imagine what it would be like to be partially or completely blind, for example.

WOW..Mike...I want to kiss you....

You have solved one of the only things me and my BF ever fight about in one minute...

We rarely have fought about anything in 30 years that has any traction. We get along very well..but lately I have been wondering if he is paying attention to me. He has told me he has tinnitis...and when you wrote what you wrote...I felt like an idiot because you verbalized what he has been trying to tell me....but he didn't know how to explain it 'til he read your explanation and he said that you explained it perfectly....

He said his came from a loud concert when he was a teenager and the ringing in his ears didn't stop for a very long time..and it never totally went away...

So...I had him read this...he is very grateful to you...and then I got on my knees and asked him to forgive me.....

He did...and I learned something very valuable I will never forget....

I cannot thank you enough....you have no idea...(or maybe you do which I hope is the case)....

[MikeW]

...I cannot thank you enough....you have no idea...(or maybe you do which I hope is the case)....

Well, I'm happy to be of help! Makes my day to know that something I've said has helped someone out.

Yeah, it is a tricky one. It's not like I can't "hear" exactly, it's more like I can't "understand" WHAT I'm hearing. Again, it isn't a volume issue. From that POV my hearing is excellent. I would say "I can hear a pen drop"... but that isn't exactly true.

You see, it works like this: The sounds in my head are EXACTLY like those very small electric alarms you hear on watches, alarm clocks, refrigerator doors, and various other appliances. Since those sounds are identical to the ones in my head, my brain does not DIFFERENTIATE them from the "static". So, I don't "hear" them (become aware of them as unique sounds). LOL... A friend of mine was over a month or so ago and said, "What is that noise?" I had no idea what "noise" he was talking about. I didn't "hear" anything (other than my usual on-going cacophony). He said, "No, there's some kind of beeping,... it's coming from inside that book case." I thought HE was imagining things but I dutifully open the bookcase door and scratched around till I found it: A Stop Watch.

Now, the horrifying thing is, I hadn't looked at that stop watch in MONTHS. But it was s somehow set to "go off" every 90 minutes or so. :eek: So, if you can imagine this, this stop watch had been dutifully fulfilling its task even 90 minutes since I don't even know when BUT THERE WAS NO ONE IN THE FOREST WITH EARS TO HEAR IT. LOL! omfg

Truly the worst part of it is how my brain "makes something" of what people say. It's all via "rhymes". Trying to make up an example, say someone said "He bought the gun for self-defense." I might hear, "He brought some gum across the fence." Now, of course the latter makes NO SENSE at all... but that's just it. I "hear" it and my brain does a double take... "WHAT?!" LOL. And people get SO fucking annoyed with me. NOW they think it is because I'm an old man; but seriously this has been going on my whole adult life. And yes, sometimes it is worse, like after flying in a jet for several hours... I can't hear shit for two days. I've learned I MUST wear ear plugs when I'm around such noise.

Some sounds are literally PAINFUL, like a needle stabbing me in the ear. The last place I lived had a refrigerator with an electric alarm that sounded when ever the door was open longer than it thought it should be. It would start this high-pitched signal that just felt like a needle stab in my ear drum. GOD I hated that fucking thing and could never figure out a way to disarm it.

Anyway, as for the Kiss... After looking at your picture and discovering you're one of the kinds of men in my age group that I DO find attractive, BEWARE: I'm not going to want to stop there!

ETA... Oh, and another thing: I prefer watching movies at home because I can have the Captioning for the Hearing Impaired on. This is especially important watching films where the characters talk too fast, where the background music obscures the dialogue or anything with a British (or other) accent. Without that, I have NO IDEA what is being said.

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