Finding attractive an image that most guys don't have

[subdivisions]

When I look at the guys that most gay dudes consider attractive, or even most people in general lately, they tend to be white and scruffy/bearded and/or hairy. I think a lot of us know this already. Of course, it isn't the same for everyone. But online social media tends to push this.

I've made a thread before about not finding myself attractive. It could be because of the above. That tends to be what I find attractive. I can't post links or images yet I think so look up the following on Google images: Bo Bice, Bucky Covington, Lindsey Buckingham (circa 1970's), Tim Lambesis, Brock O'Hurn, actually just type "long hair and beard" in. I don't usually like the beards unruly or too long but I stil like them to exist.

Finding a gay guy that looks sort of "rocker" like this is hard. The few I found have no interest in me.

Oddly, a lot of bisexual guys are like that but even then, they don't like me or if they do, I get into huge arguments with them. Personality clashes. Which I get into with everyone but I'll put that in a separate topic.

But yeah, the reason I didn't like myself that much is because my features didn't match the guys I was attracted to. When I grow my facial hair out, it doesn't look good. It looks stupid. Like face-pubes. Everyone told me it looked bad. So I can't let it grow too much.

What sucks is a guy like I described was into me and we were texting and I was gonna meet up with him... he cancelled. Apparently, his husband almost found out. -_- I didn't even know he had one, otherwise I wouldn't have been texting him.

I mean there's other reasons I'm single too but guys I find attractive never hit on me. And guys who hit on me are guys I don't find attractive at all.

I guess this is everybody's dating problem lol. But yeah, anyone's thoughts on this?

[meridannight]

if the guys you find attractive don't hit on you, then you have to hit on them.

by the way, cute post.

[Anocxu]

How about the interior?

What qualities do you like in a guy?
Tell us what your dream guy is like.
On the inside.

How would you like to be treated by other guys?

What are two major qualities about you that would make YOU an awesome boyfriend?

[TwisttheLeaf]

I'm sitting here trying to figure out why you would want to look like the guys you're attracted to. I actually think it's kind of -weird- when you see two guys who look like they could be siblings dating.

Then again, I'm attracted to people who look absolutely nothing like me, and I've never had a problem with that. There's people out there for everyone.

[Justme]

I'm with meridannight. Hit on them if they aren't hitting on you. Sometimes you have to make them notice you by taking the initiative. And if they aren't into you, there is nothing you can do besides move on. It doesn't mean there is something wrong with you.

I'm mostly attracted to white men. I've been turned down many times solely because of the color of my skin. I'm not what they were attracted to.

So in a way, I'm one of those guys who hits on you... the ones you aren't attracted to at all. Lol. And you are unattractive to someone else. I think it's a part of life. Its something everyone experiences at some point.

[subdivisions]

if the guys you find attractive don't hit on you, then you have to hit on them.

I've done that hundreds of times at least, to no avail. Well, one avail. He became the best guy ever to me, then out of nowhere dumped me and broke my heart, then I ended up passed out in my car after taking 2 bottles of medication all at once.

So I don't hit on guys anymore, because I fear rejection so much. I don't take it well. I even say in my dating profiles, "I don't send the first message, so send one if interested", so the other guy knows to message me.

One time, a really cute and seemingly cool guy liked my profile. That like never happens. So I liked his profile back and messaged him. But he wanted nothing to do with me honestly. He must have been drunk when he liked my profile. His profile said he loved beer. Figures.

How about the interior?

What qualities do you like in a guy?
Tell us what your dream guy is like.
On the inside.

I made another thread about this; it didn't get approved yet, for some reason. I don't get why some posts I make need to get approved when this thread didn't.

How would you like to be treated by other guys?

With respect. Like I mean something to them. Like I'm really important to them. Like they enjoy being around me a lot. Not to be made to do something I don't want to do. I want to feel loved and special. But not spoiled.

What are two major qualities about you that would make YOU an awesome boyfriend?

Hm... well I enjoy being around my signifigant others a lot. Well, assuming I actually love him. I didn't love my first ex but that's a complicated story. I'm easy to please, I don't need expensive things. I think I'm funny and although my sense of humor is weird and often offensive, I did find people who love it. I tend to learn new things quickly. I'm versatile. xD Honestly not much. But I still think that to the right person, I'll be perfect.

I'm sitting here trying to figure out why you would want to look like the guys you're attracted to. I actually think it's kind of -weird- when you see two guys who look like they could be siblings dating.

Then again, I'm attracted to people who look absolutely nothing like me, and I've never had a problem with that. There's people out there for everyone.

Because a lot of us are brainwashed by society to find the same thing attractive. I know I am. As I said, society seems to find the same type of guy attractive. And most guys like what I first described... are with other guys who look like them. Not facial features that make them look like siblings. Just similar features- same race, scruffy, not too fat, etc.

Though, to be honest, I wouldn't have a problem dating someone who looked like me sometimes... call me autosexual.

[meridannight]

Hm... well I enjoy being around my signifigant others a lot. Well, assuming I actually love him. I didn't love my first ex but that's a complicated story. I'm easy to please, I don't need expensive things. I think I'm funny and although my sense of humor is weird and often offensive, I did find people who love it. I tend to learn new things quickly. I'm versatile. xD Honestly not much. But I still think that to the right person, I'll be perfect.

i'm sure you will be. i also think 22 is too young to worry that you won't meet the right guy in your life. you have so much time to live and learn, meet new guys and explore them, and, eventually, settle when it feels right.

Though, to be honest, I wouldn't have a problem dating someone who looked like me sometimes... call me autosexual.

there's this guy who looks a lot like me (or i look a lot like him, whichever way you look at it). he's 20 years older than me but there's an obvious resemblance (and, thankfully, he's the only guy in the world -- i know of -- who resembles me in facial features). my friends have commented on it and asked me if i was related to him.

i would totally do him. he's fucking hot.

[TigerLover]

Wow I actually had long hair and a beard until fairly recently. I like to think of it as the viking look.

And it's no wonder you can't find many men sporting it. It makes finding work so much more difficult. With that hair you can't work with food and no one is going to employ you for customer service work unless it's over the phone. Even in other industries you're just sabotaging your chances at interview by looking "unprofessional". Plus there we're more than a few people who assumed I was a stoner.

No most of the guys with that style are either students or make their living in the arts.

[meridannight]

Plus there we're more than a few people who assumed I was a stoner.

that's silly. everybody knows the real ''stoners'' are walking around in suit and tie (optional).

i know people from basically all walks of life who do drugs. some are businessmen, some are public life figures, musicians, composers, film directors, photographers, construction workers, DJs....i'd be hard-pressed to find a social class or a profession that boasts no drug use. it's a rather universal phenomenon.

[LJay]

OP, your first 50 posts are randomly reviewed. Keep posting and they will show up later. It is a troll defense and not personally aimed at you.

As for your preferred look in guys. If you want to meet guys like that you need to hang out where they do. Chances are it will be a challenge, but there are a number of such guys that are gay. From the sounds of it you have some other stuff to work through, also. Just keep in mind that, though society is more open to people being gay than it once was, a lot of people are just not comfortable with it. You have to deal with that as well as your own problems. Not easy. Keep at it.