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What are your insecurities, and how are you dealing with it?
#1
Insecurities are a part of being human. Even the most confident and attractive individuals have insecurities on some level. What's important is that we can identify them and deal with them so we can love for who we are. What are yours?

I'll start: I'm a little insecure about being Asian, especially in the gay community. I've met a lot of individuals who don't find Asians attractive whatsoever, and even deny friendship because I'm Asian. It's a punch in the face every time I come across a dating profile and it says at the bottom: "No Asians."

*sigh*

How I'm dealing with it: I've developed a very confident persona in public and I learned how to dress well, and I try to act as friendly as possible. I'm also trying to just ignore everyone that doesn't want Asians... if they don't want me, I don't want them, especially if they're willing to exclude someone totally just on their ethnicity.

What about you guys?
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#2
I've been working with people with special needs for 10 years. I still feel like I'm crap at what I do. Could do it better. Should've done this. Shouldn't have done that. Did that wrong. That person must think I don't know what I'm doing. Etc. It's exhausting.

Sad
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#3
Have you encountered such an issue here?
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#4
1and1, it sounds like you are constantly self-evaluating because you care about doing a good job. Bet you are better at it that you think.

I had a prof, a musician, who taught us that we have to be our own harshest critics. It does not make for a terrifically happy life, but it does keep you on your toes.

By the way, is that a pepper, persimmon, or Christmas light in your avatar? It's very pretty.
I bid NO Trump!
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#5
LJay Wrote:1and1, it sounds like you are constantly self-evaluating because you care about doing a good job. Bet you are better at it that you think.

I had a prof, a musician, who taught us that we have to be our own harshest critics. It does not make for a terrifically happy life, but it does keep you on your toes.

By the way, is that a pepper, persimmon, or Christmas light in your avatar? It's very pretty.

Part of me does not want to live like that anymore. Not when my heart lies in my music now. I've had enough of being on my toes. I want to feel relaxed and content. But this kind of work does not allow for that. Not least because of the kids, but because of the employers or staff.

Being chucked in the deep end with inadequate support or development. Being left to get on with It. So it's a case of constantly being in the dark and having to juggle a million things.

My avatar is the logo of my music production software.
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#6
Anocxu Wrote:Have you encountered such an issue here?

I have not, no. But I have on plenty of other sites.
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#7
Alto Wrote:Do you feel the same if they are only looking for asians, a guy messaged me and on his profile he said he was looking for a japanese friend and I messaged him back saying that I thought I had a japanese friend once but it was just my imagine asian, he never messaged me back

I have insecurities about pretty much everything.

Pretty much. The people that I've talked to that were ONLY into Asians or ONLY wanted a Japanese/Korean mate, 99% of them had a fetish thing going on. Only wanted the sex.

I was talking to this caucasian guy and he thought I was extremely attractive.

He asked me things like "I wish you can come over and be my pool boy," or "I bet you give great massages. Do you do happy endings?"

Stuff like that irritates me. POOL BOY?? He made it sound like he wanted me to be his sex servant or something.
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#8
Stevefs Wrote:Insecurities are a part of being human. Even the most confident and attractive individuals have insecurities on some level. What's important is that we can identify them and deal with them so we can love for who we are. What are yours?

I'll start: I'm a little insecure about being Asian, especially in the gay community. I've met a lot of individuals who don't find Asians attractive whatsoever, and even deny friendship because I'm Asian. It's a punch in the face every time I come across a dating profile and it says at the bottom: "No Asians."

*sigh*

How I'm dealing with it: I've developed a very confident persona in public and I learned how to dress well, and I try to act as friendly as possible. I'm also trying to just ignore everyone that doesn't want Asians... if they don't want me, I don't want them, especially if they're willing to exclude someone totally just on their ethnicity.

What about you guys?

On your profile, you should write "No crackers" at the bottom.
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#9
Stevefs Wrote:Pretty much. The people that I've talked to that were ONLY into Asians or ONLY wanted a Japanese/Korean mate, 99% of them had a fetish thing going on. Only wanted the sex.

I was talking to this caucasian guy and he thought I was extremely attractive.

He asked me things like "I wish you can come over and be my pool boy," or "I bet you give great massages. Do you do happy endings?"

Stuff like that irritates me. POOL BOY?? He made it sound like he wanted me to be his sex servant or something.

That is so insulting. Was this an older guy? Do you get it from younger guys, too?
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#10
himself Wrote:On your profile, you should write "No crackers" at the bottom.

Lol! I would have, but I like white guys, too Smile I like any ethnicity so long as they're nice

Darius Wrote:That is so insulting. Was this an older guy? Do you get it from younger guys, too?

Not as much, but I've gotten it from a guy that was 2 years younger than me. I'm 22, he was 20, but he looked a LOT older. Like.. maybe almost 26. Tall Russian guy, about 6'3", very muscly. On his profile it said straight, but he wanted me to come over so that he can "make use" of me before his girlfriend got home.
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