Yep help me. I'm so dull.

[Rod]

[SIZE="5"]SO!

As we all know I came out earlier this year to just about everyone in my family so I'm only just starting to deal with the intricate dating process (the serious dating stuff at least). Not all gay men are different and yes all of them have their own individual preferences and stuff, But i need to know, What should i be talking about on the first date and what shouldn't I be talking about on the first date? Should i be bringing up past relationships? Should i keep things basic? Should i ask about family and occupation? I am loaded with questions but i don't wanna come off as pushy nor do i want to cross that border where someone might lose interest or be offended by me because I'm asking stuff too early.

What topics should i be touching on the first date?

What shouldn't I ask until we're closer? [/SIZE]

[matty7]

just off to work so no time for big reply right now - only thing i'll say is the "im so dull " title is wrong" With the right person with similar interests and passions then you are going to be far from dull buddy ... just try and remember that

[LONDONER]

You might come across as a bit pushy if you just start speaking about everything about yourself. You could try drawing the other person out by asking him about himself and his interests.

[East]

1) Don't bring up your exes unless you have something nice to say about them

2) Don't complain about what is wrong with men..or what it wrong with gay men in particular

3) Don't make fun of other people...you will attract the wrong guy...

Remember..when you are talking about other people whether it be someone you know or don't know..you are showing people who you are..and saying nothing at all about anyone else.

30 years now.....never said a bad word about my BF to anyone..not even once. It is one of the secrets not many people realize. I watched guys "date" for so many years as I sat behind the bar in a gay club I saw the same mistakes over and over and over....

The top three are above.....

What you DO want to be is authentic. Be who you are. Don't hide it. If you are a freak..let your freak flag fly. They are gonna find out anyway.

I know..that sounds simple ..BECAUSE IT IS!!!

One of the things I did which I won't suggest unless you think you can pull it off...I put my worst foot forward just to break the ice and not have to go through all that nervous nonsense.... and I am rebellious and would rather not put my best foot forward.

Oh yeah...why do you call yourself "dull"? Specifically....why?

[Borg69]

Think of it like a job interview. Don't sell yourself short, and don't oversell your abilities.

Ask questions. When asked, be honest but don't give TOO many details.

Don't list what you (!!!) Think your flaws are.

[Insertnamehere]

Can't give you too much advice here but definitely don't bring up exes and things like that on your first date.

I would also say keep the communication balanced, as it neither of you should talk too much about yourselves but both of you should have the opportunity to do so.

[Sylph]

Maybe my Dating thingie I broken;

The very few times I even try to date, I rarely follow any rules, and usually either get a Man who is hot after my "exoticism" (which I've never experienced before going to England) or Men who are too shy;

And so going from that alone, my only advice conceivably speaking is just follow the cliché of be yourself.

My experience pales in comparison to the sea of Veteran Fish in this Ocean, but leaving a lure in for too long or reeling it in early, not go catch you a fish :v

Is like a game of Water Tag;

If you wait too long, you lose and if you make lots of ripples you will chase away the people you gotta tag.

[kindy64]

Good advice from everyone.

You could try talking about cooking, music yoga... you know things that interest you. Or the weather. I'd avoid politics.