Going to gay bars alone?

[Anonymous]

I hate online dating.
Apps, websites, I can't stand them anymore.
I guess I could try gay bars, the only problem is, I don't really have any friends to go to them with. Also I don't drink alcohol in public. I'd have to drive, so that's out of the question.
Would I look approachable? Because I'm one of those losers who's too shy to talk to someone first so I let other people ask me out instead.

[Insertnamehere]

I suppose it's a matter of how you present yourself. If you go for looking shy, you'd probably be noticed as such.

[Camfer]

Yes, you'll be approachable alone in a gay bar/club as long as you're smiling and enjoying yourself. You don't have to drink alcohol. You can drink a soda and only the bartender will know there's no alcohol in it.

Being shy doesn't make you a loser.

It's pretty easy, you just make eye contact with people. You don't have to say anything. Non-verbal communication is very effective. If you look approachable, you are approachable.

Then if someone talks to you and you're interested, you do your best to keep the conversation going.

As you get more comfortable, you might even find it's more effective for you to say hi to someone you want to talk to. All you do is walk up and say, "Hi, I'm _________." It really is just three words.

Get used to some rejection. You are not interested in everyone who is interested in you, so don't get upset if you're interested in someone who's not interested in you.

Learn the bartender's name and the front doorman's name. These are people who can prove to be helpful to you in a variety of situations.

[himself]

Everyone's approachable in a gay bar.

[starlight]

I found it easier yet still scary to go in a gay bar on holiday in Prague, i couldnt go in this country alone. My view of most gay lads is shaded anyway so id first of all find it not just scary but id find it hard to trust.

[Pix]

Just be aware that if you're shy who lets others come to him (or her, tends to work this way regardless of whether you're male or female), the ones most likely to approach you are those who are constantly looking for fresh meat rather than a partner.

They can typically be identified by telling you exactly what you want to hear (and some are experts at feeling you out and finding what to say to get what they want, and some even trade tips with each other on how to get into your pants), and what you'd expect more in a the romance genre filed under fiction rather than anyone's true life story. I can only guess that people fall for it over and over because they want it to be true so bad. This may mean that the relatively rare decent guy you may prefer won't be the one you go home with as he's not the one telling you the lies you want to believe as the decent guy has too much respect for you to do that.

I'm just saying this because there are hordes of men and women who go out as wallflowers waiting for the bees to come to them and then end up crying about how everyone uses them for sex and loses them and come to think all men are pigs rather than they're picking the wrong ones over and over. But if you're just after a little fun rather than love then this doesn't apply to you.

[Pix]

That aside, I wanted to say thank you for not drinking & driving. mile:

[LJay]

[MENTION=14705]Pix[/MENTION], many people realize that there are other people hanging out in gay bars waiting for fresh meat. That is why they go there.

[LJay]

So [MENTION=23118]starlight[/MENTION], how is it that you could get up the courage to go to a bar in Prague, but can't in your hometown?

[starlight]

So [MENTION=23118]starlight[/MENTION], how is it that you could get up the courage to go to a bar in Prague, but can't in your hometown?

I went there on holiday for the sake of that and mainly because i didnt know anyone or anything it was easier, i know of my nearest gay area too well and im not keen at all as most people who go there are actually very nasty.