Why am I having trouble staying satisfied sexually?

[sethmachine]

I'm almost 24 and I'm in a monogamous relationship with a loving partner. He is on the opposite spectrum in me in terms of physical intimacy, e.g. for him once a week is more than enough (he really only ejaculates about once a week) and has very little desire to ejaculate.

Through my experiences and past relationships, I've felt that physical intimacy is really a key component to any healthy and satisfying relationship for me.

My partner is very loving and accommodating and wants to make me happy. When we do have physical intimacy and I'm inside him, I'm able to have him in any position(s) and speed I want, and it's very intense (for me). However, I often want more immediately after finishing, and several times I have gone again / finished twice in a row, though this is usually much less comfortable for him.

I feel really satisfied after these intimate moments, but they're not as often as I'd like. I've tried talking with him about it, but he's a bit opposed. And these days when I'm in public, I'm always checking out all the cute guys.

What's wrong with me?

[Anocxu]

He is on the opposite spectrum in me in terms of physical intimacy

Are you equating physical intimacy to 'Only' sexual intercourse?

Do you two..
hug?

Cuddle?

Sit outside looking up at the stars while holding each other?

An early morning walk on the beach holding hands?

Shower together?

Lay with your head in his lap while watching a movie? Then switch.. his head in your lap?

A foot massage?

A tickle fight?

^^^^
See what I did there?

Broaden your definition of physical intimacy and this could solve a ton of issues between you two..

[himself]

I actually have a low sex drive, like your partner. I try to cum most days but it's more of a hobby rather than something I have to do. If I were him, I'd like to think that I'd get a stunt double in to pick up the slack for me. Or not. Maybe there are other ways he can please you without his ass. I once spoke to a man (online) who talked about fucking armpits. Maybe he could let you use his armpits once his ass gets uncomfortable.

[Anocxu]

I actually have a low sex drive, like your partner. I try to cum most days but it's more of a hobby rather than something I have to do. If I were him, I'd like to think that I'd get a stunt double in to pick up the slack for me. Or not. Maybe there are other ways he can please you without his ass. I once spoke to a man (online) who talked about fucking armpits. Maybe he could let you use his armpits once his ass gets uncomfortable.

You should be tarred and feathered for that comment..

No hugs for you..

Today...

[Camfer]

I don't think there's anything wrong with you. Some questions arise.

Does he ever masturbate? If he's spending some of his sexual energy alone rather than with you, maybe some of it could be redirected your way.

Why do you emphasize ejaculation? Your partner may be perfectly content to have sex without ejaculating. Cumming makes some people tired. What are his energy levels?

Do you ask him about what he would like to do sexually? How do you encourage him to take initiative and come up with ideas?

Have you thought about him making some videos for you to use when you need to jerk off on your own? Then you can still be focused on your partner even if you're doing it solo.

How do you give and receive physical affection with your partner outside of sex?

How routine is your sex life? How can you change it up that works well for both of you?

And lastly, if your partner were writing here about the same topic, what would he write?

[MikeW]

...
What's wrong with me?

Why is anything wrong with you? You're 23yo. You're a horny guy. You want to make love with your partner but he's not accommodating you. So, yeah, you're probably sexually frustrated... which is why you look at guys when you're out and about.

This is a big issue. If some kind of amicable solution isn't worked out between you, it could end the relationship.

I don't know what to tell you other than talk it out with your partner. Be completely open and honest about how you feel. Allow him to do the same. See if there's any middle ground or something that would work for both of you. If need be, see a couple's counselor.

[LJay]

Sounds to me as though you are both perfectly normal in perfectly normal ways. Not everyone is the same. If you do not already, you need to define your relationship in ways beyond the physical. You also need to talk over the ways in which you can make each other happy physically. It is a balancing act that requires a lot of patience and ingenuity.

[CellarDweller]

I don't think there's anything wrong with you, but one question.....do you have to ejaculate inside him for you to be satisfied?

If he were to give you a blow job or hand job, would you find that satisfying as well?

[himself]

You should be tarred and feathered for that comment..

No hugs for you..

Today...

After spending hours trying to think of a reply, I finally thought of this one: shut up!

[Cuddly]

I have a similar problem. My husbear is 30 years older though, so I suppose that's only natural. Still, it's frustrating that I'm ready again after about 20 mins while he seems content with waiting a week.
Frankly it often leaves me feeling undesired. That's when I get really sad.