I'm very confussed

[Anonymous]

Hi all, I’m a bit confused??? For starters no one knows that I’m gay. My problem is about one of my best mates. For ages now he has like been making comments about me being gay in a joking way, but the other night after a house party at his, we were texting each other for about 2 and a half hrs after. It started off with me saying I wish I didn’t go home as I had drink left n i wanted to go back. Things progressed n by the end of it all he was saying he wished id gone back to wank him off. We were both very drunk and the next day when I seen him at work it was a bit awkward but we both didn’t mention it. How can I tell if he was as usual joking or if has never been joking and he actually meant it as he has never before been so blunt? I would hate to read the situation wrong n loose him as a friend??? I would be grateful for any suggestions. Thanks!

[BobBlack1988]

I personally wouldn't read too much into it. It is possible he just said it for shock value. The trouble with texts is its difficult to tell about things like this. Is he gay himself?

[Anonymous]

Well he isnt out gay but he does act very camp and he never talks about girls like my other "straight" mates n ive never known him to be with or pull a girl when we go out drinking which is most weekends lol.

[Shadow]

I'd probably wait until what I considered to be a suitable opportunity presented itself (i.e. when you're both comfy, and it's just the two of you), and then just bring up the TOPIC, not the specifics ... and see whether conversation turns that way again ... so you could say something about the length of time you guys were texting or something like that - something that's in the region of where you want things to go (conversation-wise), without just blurting the question out ...

... bait him, in other words.

mile:.

If he doesn't TAKE the bait, or he steers conversation AWAY from that topic, then you can take that as a subtle sign that he's not happy discussing it again.

!?!?! Shadow !?!?!

[Dizzybeatle]

I had the same thing about a month ago...
I baited him, and then told him I was go so he needs to stop winding me up.
Then he was like, so am I! And yeah, things went from there lmao

Shadow is right though, be careful, dont be too blunt. I only did what I did becaude I was quite certain he was gay. If you are very unsure, be safe (Y)

[Low__x]

"A drunk mind speaks the truth"

Go for it, mann.

[ourgaysite]

A lot of my friends back in high school used to act gay at times. I am not sure if it was cause they were bi-curious or it was just the thing to do. I am glad I never took it as a sign they might be gay and come out to them. They were all straight and homophobic. If I were you I would just be his friend and if he reveals anything later then so be it.

[Kiid]

mayb you could come out to him if hes a good friend he shouildn't cear and if hes gay he may even come out to u inturn. i think you should be proud of being gay like i am

YAY I'M 16 AND GAY lol

[yero69]

remember whatever your decision there will be consequences
just stay safe