Hook-ups and career moves

[JTEvans1]

So I’ve been lurking here a while but I need some advice so I guess it’s time to get my feet wet. I’m 25, I live in NYC, and I work in marketing but I’m also a freelance writer with a (small) following. I’m not very happy with my current career and I’ve been thinking about making the jump to a media job where I could write full time. It’s competitive obviously so that’s been a little slow.

Recently I met a guy (through Scruff, not classy, sorry) we met up for late night drinks. One thing lead to another, fast forward a few hours and I’m at his apartment drinking his whiskey, doing a modest amount of coke, hooking up, and trading life stories. I know this sounds trashy as hell but it was honestly one of the most honest, invigorating nights of my life. We talked about bad break ups and our careers, I think we both cried and laughed at one point or another. I’m not a big advocate for drugs generally, but in this case we ended up in just the right place to form a real connection.

Anyway, we went our separate ways but it turns out he works for a big digital media company that shall remain nameless and he’s been pushing me to let him set me up with a job. This seems like something that’s’ within his power to do. We’re roughly the same age but he works as an editorial recruiter. I’m torn about taking an opportunity that comes about in this way. On the one hand, it’s basically the perfect job, on the other hand wtf am I thinking? Who offers career help to someone they just met in those circumstances. I’m not, in fact, some sort of crazed party guy, but all he knows about me is that I will do coke with a stranger and that I’m great at eating ass. That’s insane right?

As far as I can tell he’s not looking for anything. He has a slightly older fiancé back in San Francisco but they’re in an open relationship. He hasn't really pursued another hookup or even asked to hang out socially, he just seems very keen to get me a job. I want to do it but I’m a little wary of connecting my career so blatantly to a very uncharacteristic one night stand even though he seems like a thoroughly decent guy.

[jimcrackcorn]

Don't miss an opportunity to further your career goals just because your unsure of the circumstances that led you to that opportunity.

Thoroughly check out the company before you commit.

Sin-cerely,
Jimerooo

[LJay]

Yep, seems flakey but consider the field. Freelance writing and marketing are not exactly bound to the behavior of older ladies with streaky yellow hair and longer skirts. I'm thinking it is a wide world out there. Competitive? You bet.

Consider carefully just exactly who you will be working for (direct supervisor), what the job really is, the track record of the company in dealing with its employees, etc. You should also do a bit of sleuthing about your new friend.

Then you should take into account the advice of my beloved priest of yore: "Use what ya got."

[Sherbil]

The best way to think about it is pros and cons. What happens if you accept his offer and then it's not what you wanted? The worst thing would be that you'd be back at it looking for a job in marketing again, right?

If it were me, I'd do it. There are much worse reasons to take jobs. I understand you being wary, but it sounds like you could likely get another job in marketing if you needed to, but opportunities like this are much more rare.

[InbetweenDreams]

Look into it, also is there a way you could do both until you feel comfortable, assuming you take the job? If you hate the new job you can always fall back. If that is workable for you.

The only thing worse than a shitty job is a shittier job...I've been there before.

[CorsacReborn]

If you really do want to look at what opportunities that this can bring then instead of just going for it you could actually arrange to meet the guy in a more controlled environment like a coffee shop or somewhere similar. Ask this guy to bring some information on the company and/or a portfolio of the work that they undertake so that you can have a good look at that and see if it is in line with what you want.

If you feel uncomfortable because of what happened then you need to be honest let the guy know, he might even be able to reassure you if his intentions are genuine with this offer. One night does not make you a "crazed party boy".

[Borg69]

A lot of people have to climb the corporate ladder by kissing a little ass... so you took it a step further and had to eat a little ass instead. It may be a little unconventional, but if you really have nothing to lose, why not go for it? You like to write, and this sounds like the beginning of a great story. Turn the page and see what's in the next chapter.

You took a chance in meeting him, going to his place, doing drugs, opening up to him and having sex... how is taking a job a bigger chance than that??? NOW you want to play it safe?

[Emiliano]

Personally I'd be cautious about a guy who promised me a career after a night of doing coke and hooking up. Maybe I'm just old fashioned.

[Insertnamehere]

If it's not breaking the law you are free to go for it if you wish, but exercise caution.

I'm a bit concerned over the motives of a guy you just met. Call me paranoid, but I don't trust people that easily, even less so if the first meeting with the guy involved drugs.